


Tread Softly

by QueenSabriel



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: M/M, Minor Violence, Post-The Raven King, Sexual Content, The Raven King Spoilers, adam learns more about being the magician, background bluesey / sarchengsey, pynch - Freeform, set post-freshman year of college for adam, summertime adventures, the team has to work together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-16
Updated: 2016-09-18
Packaged: 2018-08-09 05:37:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 42,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7788784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenSabriel/pseuds/QueenSabriel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Adam never thought returning to Henrietta for the summer would be easy, but he did not expect to find his name on a letter that should not exist, and the promise of a gift that could be a weapon in the wrong hands.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Adam sat in the middle of his half empty dorm room. His roommate Ben had moved out that morning, heading back home for the summer. Without the constant presence and sound of another person, the high-ceilinged room felt echoey and barren, even with most of Adam's things still in place on his side. He should be packing, he knew, Ronan was getting in that afternoon and even though they would be spending the night, Ronan wanted to load up the car as much as possible so they could get an early start the following morning. It was, after all, a ten hour drive from Cambridge, MA to Henrietta, VA. 

At the forefront of Adam's mind was a dark cloud of anxiety, though he couldn't quite understand why. He was going back; not to the slogging prison of his childhood but to three months of waking up next to his boyfriend, of seeing Blue and Gansey, and Opal. It wasn't the Henrietta he had spent so long trying to escape, it was the Henrietta that happened when he found his friends. His real family.  

To occupy himself while waiting for Ronan, Adam grabbed his tarot cards from where they sat on his desk. (His friends here at school were fascinated by them. After he correctly foretold Lhakpa getting the internship she wanted, and Ben meeting his now girlfriend Sheila, there was no doubt in their minds that he was, in fact, some kind of magician. Adam didn't argue with them too much.)  

Absently Adam shuffled the deck and flipped three cards out before him: The Lovers. Wheel of Fortune. Eight of Wands. The first made him smile, the second made him curious, and the Eight of Wands made him nothing short of perplexed. Apparently this summer wasn't going to be the quiet, relaxing one he had been expecting, if the cards were right. They showed his close relationships being important and present which was no surprise, but also pointed to change, turning points and potentially some kind of important message.  

Adam was still puzzling over the spread when someone knocked on the open door behind him. He jumped, turned, then smiled widely. "Ronan..." He got a bit clumsily to his feet, stepping forward to throw his arms around Ronan and cling to him, face pressed to the side of his neck. "I missed you."  

"I was just here two weeks ago," Ronan said, but he held Adam tightly and kissed him the minute Adam lifted his head.  

Someone passing in the hall whistled and went "Wooo, Adam!" to which Adam was sure Ronan responded with a middle finger, though he didn't break the kiss for a second.  

Parting finally, Ronan looked past Adam at the room. He snorted. "Didn't you start packing?" 

"Not really." Adam finally moved to close the door, then sit on his bed. "I was procrastinating. Did you leave Opal and Chainsaw behind?" 

"If you think I'd want to be stuck in a car with those two for ten fucking hours..." Ronan said, making a face. "Chainsaw's at home and Opal's with the witches." 

Adam rolled his eyes. "I think Blue would punch you if she heard you calling her family that." 

"Sargent doesn't care," Ronan said. He stretched, kicking Adam accidentally as he suddenly sprawled out on the narrow twin bed. "Seriously, though, we should load up the car tonight." 

"Sure," Adam said. He made no move to get up, instead lying down beside Ronan, his deaf ear pressed to Ronan's chest. He could still feel his heartbeat, faintly, even if he couldn't hear it. The anxious, dark cloud in his mind ebbed just a little as he draped an arm around Ronan's waist.  

Ronan curled his arm around Adam, combing his fingers through his hair. After about ten minutes of lying in silence, however, he squirmed a little and sat up. "Seriously, Parrish, let's get your shit in the car." 

"Impatient, Lynch?" Adam shot back. He gave Ronan another kiss before getting up to pull his suitcase and duffel bag and backpack out of the closet. "Blue called me this morning, she said her and Gansey are getting in tonight. They want us to come over for a cookout tomorrow." 

"We gotta pick up Opal anyway," Ronan said, nodding. He was sitting on the bed still, arms resting on his knees. "Their third wheel not with them?" 

Adam gave him a look. "Cheng's visiting his mom or something. And he's not their third wheel, Ro, be nice." 

"Fine, their boyfriend."  

"That's..." Adam trailed off then shrugged. "Potentially more accurate."  

The two of them exchanged a grin. Ronan got up and started taking down Adam's clothes that were hanging in the closet. When he started just throwing them haphazardly into the suticase however Adam shooed him away and told him to get the stuff off the desk. 

By dinnertime they had all but the essentials loaded into the BMW, and were sitting on Adam's bed debating where to eat when a dark haired girl appeared in the doorway of the room. She grinned when she spotted them. "I thought I spotted the prodigal boyfriend. Hey Ronan!" 

Ronan rolled his eyes but leaned forward, holding his fist out. "Sherpa." 

Lhakpa Sherpa was the first friend Adam had made at school, a bright and funny girl who's parents had moved to the US from Nepal a few years before she was born. The first time she met Ronan the two of them had engaged in what looked like a fifteen minute staring contest that was broken, surprisingly, by Ronan saying "I like her." 

"Did you guys eat yet?" Lhakpa asked, sitting down on Ben's empty bed. "Do you want to get Boloco? I'm going to miss the shit out of that place this summer."  

"I'm surprised you haven't turned into a burrito yet with how much you can eat there," Adam said. 

"Did you know they've got a fucking Chipotle in Henrietta now?" Ronan said, wrinkling his nose. 

Adam raised his eyebrows. "Wow, it's really turning into a thriving metropolis isn't it." 

"One of these days I'm going to come visit and compare it to the village where my aunt lives," Lhakpa said. She bounced to her feet again. "You two coming or not?" 

Ronan pretended to look annoyed about the whole ordeal, but he got up and reached for Adam's arm with a grunt of, "C'mon, Parrish, I'm starving." 

They locked up the room and headed out, crossing Harvard Square which was bustling at this time of night. Adam looked around, marveling at how quickly he'd adapted to life in the middle of a busy city after spending his whole life in Henrietta. A lot of people had told him it would be a jarring transition, but other than the sheer amount of constant _noise,_ he hadn't found it too bad.  

And he could do things like hold Ronan's hand as they walked without feeling like anyone was going to come up and say something about it. He slid his hand down, curling his fingers through Ronan's. 

Next to him Ronan and Lhakpa were debating something about cows, but Adam wasn't really listening. Instead he was drinking in the sights around him; the storefronts glowing in the fading twilight, the people wearing t-shirts from Harvard and MIT and Boston University, the street performers, the tourists. Music spilled out of one of the restaurants they passed, sifting through the chatter of people eating at sidewalk tables. The pavement still radiated heat from the afternoon sun that was now setting. The smell of food wafted everywhere. 

Henrietta was going to seem so quiet after all of this. So quiet and so empty. He thought again about the tarot cards he had drawn that morning; something is going to change for you, they had said. Be ready for a message, be ready to take action. 

Adam sighed, and tightened his grip on his boyfriend's hand. 

*** 

The appearance of a BMW in front of 300 Fox Way just after six p.m. prompted an unusual explosion of activity within. It began with a piercing shout of "Advenerunt! Hic sunt! _"_ _They_ _'_ _ve arrived, they're here!_ This in turn was followed by the pounding of feet (and hooves) as Blue Sargent, Richard Gansey III, and Opal all went charging out of the house and down the front walk.  

Getting out of the car Adam instantly found his arms full of Opal, which was not surprising, and Ronan found _his_ arms full of Blue Sargent, which was a little surprising, though not so much considering they hadn't seen each other face-to-face since just before Christmas. Gansey settled back waiting for the enthusiasm to subside before he pulled Ronan and then Adam into one-armed hugs.  

"How was the drive down?" he asked as the little group huddled together, Opal leaning back against Adam who had his hands on her shoulders.  

Ronan shrugged. "I've gotten used to it."  

"He still hates Massachusetts drivers though," Adam said, smirking. Used to it or not, the trip had involved quite a bit of profanity on Ronan's part. 

" _Everyone_ hates Massachusetts drivers," Gansey said, sympathetically. Then he motioned them towards the house. "C'mon, Mom Sargent and Calla are getting food set up in the back, probably more than all of us can eat but what can you do..." 

Ronan grinned fiendishly at him. "Mom Sargent?"  

"Something wrong, Lynch?" Gansey said with an innocent smile.  

"She has, reluctantly, accepted him into the clan," Blue explained, taking Adam's arm in her own as they let Gansey and Ronan lead the way around to the back of the house. "It's sweet. She does like him, now." 

Adam smiled. "That's good." He gave Blue's arm a squeeze. "And it's good to see you again." 

"You too," Blue said, grinning. "I'm glad we're all back here for the summer. Henry said he'll be coming in mid-July. After spending the year gallivanting around the continent with us he had some family obligations to go to or something...Is it weird being back here?" 

" _Here_ here?" Adam asked. "No. In Henrietta? Yeah." 

Blue nodded, watching him for a moment. "Well, at least you'll get to be with Ronan 24/7 again, that'll be nice." 

"Yeah," Adam sighed, and didn't realize just how longing the gaze he threw his boyfriend was until Blue snorted loudly and elbowed him.  

"Try to wait until you get home to jump his bones though, okay?" She said, snickering.  

"I heard that!" Ronan shouted.  

*** 

Dinner was perfect. Calla had grilled a bunch of things and Maura had made cupcakes and side dishes and by the time the meal was over no one seemed able to move from their seats, except for Opal who was busy finding out if cupcake wrappers tasted as good as their contents. Though the sun had gone down the backyard glowed with the flickering light from a few torches stuck in the lawn, and the ethereal shine of the strings of lights Blue had put up in the branches of the tree above their heads.  

Adam felt warm, and the cloud of anxiety was, for the moment, banished almost entirely from his mind. He jumped when Calla rapped her knuckles on the table top beside him.  

"Blue said you wanted a job this summer." 

"Huh? Oh, yeah, I probably..." Adam glanced at Ronan, he had only mentioned it in passing to him, and hadn't brought it up again because those sorts of things usually led to uncomfortable arguments. He looked up at Calla. "Yeah." 

Calla nodded. "If you want something part time I could use help at the Aglionby office. We're switching over to digital student records and it's a big pain in the ass that'll take all summer. It's only part time but the pay is decent considering all you'll be doing is typing and scanning. Probably would be about $15.50 an hour." 

"That sounds great, actually, thank you," Adam said. He had been glumly picturing a sweltering summer back at one of his old jobs. At least Aglionby would be air conditioned. 

Ronan turned around, having clearly overheard. " _Aglionby?"_ He scoffed. "Why the hell would you want to go back there?" 

"Because it beats working at the mechanics, don't it?" Adam said. He could see Ronan getting ready to make another snarky comment and said quietly and firmly, "I'm doing this, Ro."  

"Oookay," Ronan said, shrugging and slouching back in his seat.  

"Magician and snake charmer both," Calla said, laughing under her breath.  She tapped the table again. "Remind me before you go to give you the forms you should bring with on Monday." 

Adam smiled and nodded. "Sure. Thank you, Calla, I really do appreciate it." 

She flapped one hand dismissively at him before going to put the lids on some of the food containers.  

Ronan shifted his seat closer to Adam so he could say quietly, "I thought the whole 'full ride to Harvard' deal meant you didn't need to work shit jobs anymore."  

"Ronan..." 

"I'm not _arguing_ , I'm _asking_. You never want to talk about this shit." 

And, because that was a fair point, Adam sighed. "There's still stuff I have to buy. And I don't want to talk about it because it always turns into an argument. And I know you'd be happy to just support me but that's not the kind of relationship I want." 

"You're so fucking mature, Parrish." 

Adam frowned. "What's that supposed to mean?" 

"Exactly what it sounds like." It was then Adam realized what kind of smile Ronan was giving him, affectionate rather than malicious. Leaning in Ronan bumped their foreheads together gently, then kissed the corner of his mouth. 

"One of us has to be the mature one," Adam said, fighting back a smile. When he settled back he glanced across the table and saw Blue staring at them. Adam cocked his head towards her. "What?" 

Blue shrugged and picked at her half eaten cupcake. "Just marveling at how much people can change in a year," she said, then burst into laughter when both Ronan and Adam flipped her off. 

*** 

Adam woke the following morning to find the Barns drenched in pale golden mist. He knew it had to be early; by nine a.m. that mist would have burned away, as though it too was trying to avoid the summer heat. Beside Adam the bed was empty, and he had a vague recollection of Ronan getting up a little while earlier. Presumably to work outside before it got too hot, as Adam couldn't hear any sounds from downstairs.  

It felt like a luxury being able to take his time. He had made the mistake of taking a number of early classes the past year and was used to rushing through getting dressed and having breakfast, but for the next couple days at least he didn't have anywhere to be or anything to do.  

He padded downstairs, wearing just his boxers and a crimson, slightly oversized Harvard t-shirt. As expected, the kitchen was empty, but the coffee pot was on and Adam poured himself a cup before putting some bread in the toaster. He noted, curiously, that this was not Niall Lynch's dream toaster but a regular one with a plug and everything. He would have to ask Ronan about that later.  

From outside came a shriek of childish laughter and Adam peeked out the window over the sink to see Opal galloping around in the dewy grass, Chainsaw circling overhead. As he watched, Ronan came out of the nearest barn, carrying an armload of...some kind of rubbish.  

Ronan was shirtless, wearing only jeans and boots.  

Adam swallowed thickly. He left the toast and coffee on the table and went outside.  

"Hey," Ronan said when he saw Adam. He deposited the garbage he had in an already sizable pile off to the side and  walked over to join Adam by the inexplicable ten foot stretch of red picket fence that extended out from one side of the barn. "You could've slept in." 

"I missed quiet mornings," Adam said. He hoisted himself up to perch precariously on the fence. "Also, you're walking around without a shirt on." 

Ronan's smirked. "Yeah, what's your point there, Parrish?" he asked, stepping forward so he was standing just between Adam's legs, hands moving to rest on his waist. 

"That you look real nice, Lynch," Adam replied. He reached out, putting his fingertips on Ronan's shoulder, then trailing them down over his collarbone and chest, finally settling with his hand cupping Ronan's hip, thumb moving in small circles against his skin.  

Ronan let out a breath of laughter and leaned in, brushing the tip of his nose against Adam's then turning his head to kiss him. It was a chaste kiss, by their standards, as bright and delicate as the morning around them. Adam returned it with a slightly more heated one, bringing his arms up to wrap around Ronan's shoulders. 

"Quit it, I've got work to do," Ronan murmured against his lips. He reached up and untangled Adam's arms. 

Adam scoffed and gave him a push. "This is my first morning back and you want to work?" he said.  

"Is this payback for all those times I distracted you from homework?" Ronan asked. 

"Maybe." Adam cracked a grin at him. 

Ronan rolled his eyes. "Asshole." 

"Dipshit," Adam said before he pulled Ronan close again to give him one last kiss. "All right I'll let you get back, I need to eat breakfast anyway. You're not gonna do this all day are you?" 

"Nah, just in the morning," Ronan said. "I'll be in in a bit, 'kay?" 

Adam slid off the fence, nodding. He tried to pat Opal's head as she darted past but she hissed at him and continued bounding into the barn, Chainsaw shrieking and close on her heels. Ronan sighed, gestured at the two of them and hurried after. Adam grinned to himself as he turned and started back to the house.  

After eating the toast and having at least half the cup of coffee, Adam picked up the forms Calla had given him the previous night. He wouldn't have to get them to her until he started the job on Monday, but he wanted to get them out of the way before he forgot.  

Spreading the papers out on the table, Adam realized he didn't have anything to write with; the kitchen, somehow, was no help in that department, so Adam wandered into the sitting room. The top of the desk in one corner was devoid of anything except for a few stray books, so Adam started checking the drawers; the large one in the center was either locked or stuck, but the little ones down either side opened for him. These contained the strangest assortment of trinkets – one was full to the top with skeleton keys, another had financial ledgers, another had rubber band balls and binder clips and other odds and ends. Still no pen.

Adam tried the middle drawer again. After a few sharp tugs it slid open revealing pads of paper and, _finally_ , an assortment of pens. Adam grabbed one at random—then he froze. On top of the notepads was a rectangular envelope, unremarkable except for the writing scrawled across the front: 

_Mister Adam Parrish_  

It was not Ronan's handwriting. Adam knew Ronan's handwriting, and this was far too elegant, too flourishing. But who else would have put it there? Adam stuck the pen behind his ear and used both hands to pick up the envelope. It wasn't anything special, just a regular white, business-sized envelope. Whoever left it there hadn't even sealed it.  

Adam, for whatever reason, felt a chill run up the back of his neck. Without checking to see what was actually inside the envelope he turned and walked quickly back outside and across the yard to where Ronan had been working. "Ronan?" He called when he didn't spot him immediately. " _Ronan_?!" 

"What?" Ronan appeared from inside the barn, slightly sweatier than before. He frowned when he saw the look on Adam's face. "The hell's the matter?"  

"Did you leave this in the desk inside?" Adam asked, holding the envelope up. "The one in the sitting room?" 

Ronan's frown deepened considerably. "I haven't touched the desk in the sitting room, why were you going through it?" 

"I was looking for a pen!" Adam said. "I'm serious, Ronan, did you leave this in there? I haven't read it if that's what you're worried about." 

"No, I don't know what the fuck that is," Ronan said. He made a grab for the envelope, but Adam held it out of his reach. 

"It has my name on it," Adam said. "Where did it come from?" 

"I don't fucking know, Adam!" Ronan snapped. "Did you open it?" 

Adam shook his head. He didn't protest when Ronan moved to watch over his shoulder as he slid out the single page folded inside. Adam's brow furrowed and he started to read, lips moving slightly—  

> _Adam,_  
> 
> _We haven't met, and I doubt we ever will. As unfortunate as that is, I have -_  

"What the fuck," Ronan said hoarsely, his voice cutting through Adam's reading of the letter. "What. The. Fuck." 

Adam glanced at him, "Ro, can I finish —" But he stopped because Ronan had pointed at the letter, his finger resting next to the signature. Adam glanced down and felt his chest tighten.  

The letter was signed ' _Niall Lynch._ ' 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (warning for brief homophobic language towards end of chapter)

_Adam -_  

 _We haven't met, and I doubt we ever will. As unfortunate as that is I have left something_ _for you_ _that_ _you may find useful. Call it what you like_ _—_ _a weapon_ _,_ _a crutch_ _, an artifact_ _—_ _but know_ _in the wrong hands it will be dangerous_ _at best, catastrophic at worst_ _. It feeds on the energy it is given, thus in your hands, Magician, I hope it will be a_ _productive_ _tool._  

 _What I know of you is limited to the look in Ronan's eyes when he says your name. Believe me, trusting you with him is no small_ _thing_ _on my part. But I do._ _I have to._ _We dreamers are precious and dangerous and marvelous_ _creatures_ _. Ronan is no exception._  

 _They always say that the important part_ _of any quest_ _is the journey_ _, not the end_ _. To begin then you must offer_ _up_ _something_ _:_ _a_ _piece_ _of_ _who you are_ _. I don't mean that literally of course, but you're a smart lad. You'll figure it out. The next steps will fall into place after that._  

 _Be good to my son, and tread softly, Adam Parrish, for you tread upon not only my dreams, but_ _his._  

 _Yours,_  

 _Niall Lynch_  

*** 

The letter lay in the middle of the kitchen table at 300 Fox Way. Gathered around were Ronan, Adam, Blue, and Gansey. Opal sat in the corner trying to keep a blueberry muffin away from Chainsaw, who was perched nearby. The mood in the kitchen hovered somewhere between shocked and concerned. Ronan was chewing on his bracelets, his back hunched. 

"And you're absolutely certain," Gansey said, "that you didn't dream this up?" 

"I think I'd fucking remember if I did that," Ronan snapped. What he found most unsettling about the letter was just how much it screamed Niall Lynch. It was just the kind of shit, he thought, that his father would do. Which didn't mean anything for sure of course, but it did make the little hairs on the back of Ronan's neck stand on end. 

Gansey had his elbows resting on the table, his thumb worrying over his lower lip as he continued to gaze at the paper in front of him. "It could be fake." 

"Why would someone fake something like this?" Blue said. She looked at Ronan. "D'you think...maybe your dad just...made a lucky guess?" 

"I didn't even know Adam existed until after my dad died," Ronan said. He leaned back in his seat, fingers drumming against his leg. "Dad sure as hell wouldn't have had any interactions with the Parrishes." 

Beside him Adam stiffened a little, but he had to know that Ronan didn't mean anything by that comment. "Let's say it is real," Adam said. "That Ronan's dad did leave this for me to find..." 

The others, including Ronan, looked at him as he trailed off. Ronan raised his eyebrows. "Yeah...?" 

"Should we at least consider doing what it says and seeing what happens?" Adam said. 

"I must admit I'm curious," Gansey murmured, nodding. 

The front door of the house slammed and they all looked up.  

A second later Calla stormed into the kitchen with a grocery bag. She set it down then looked at them all with a deeply suspicious frown. "It is far too quiet in here considering who is sitting around my kitchen table," she said. "What've you all done this time?" 

"Calla," Blue said, picking up the letter and offering it to Calla. "Could you do your thing with this letter? Please?" 

The older woman looked very much like she wanted to say 'keep me out of whatever this is' but she heaved a great sigh and took the letter from Blue. For a long moment she stood there, holding the paper in both hands, perfectly still and silent as she stared down at it. Finally she looked up, refolded the letter and used it to point at Ronan. "Your father wrote this." 

Ronan scowled. " _How."_  

"With a pen, I would imagine," Calla said dryly. She set the letter down and turned to start unpacking the groceries. 

Blue rolled her eyes, but Ronan curled his lip a little. "Seriously? That's all you've got?" 

"I don't know what else you think I can tell you other than the fact that Niall Lynch did in fact write that letter," Calla said, impervious to the glare Ronan was giving her. 

"Can you tell _when_ he wrote it?" Adam asked. He reached over, putting a hand on Ronan's arm to keep him from snapping anything else.  

"No," said Calla. She balled up the reusable grocery bag and shoved it into a drawer. "Did you bring those work papers with you?" 

Adam shook his head. "I'll bring them on Monday?" 

Calla nodded. She gave Ronan a brief look that was either a warning or a reprimand, then strode out of the kitchen. 

After she left, Ronan got to his feet and went over to open the refrigerator. Though he pretended to look for something to drink, he really just wanted to feel the blast of cool air on his face. A restless energy was coiling up in the marrow of his bones, and he wanted to break things, to drive fast, to throw something heavy across the room. The milk jug looked awfully tempting for that but Ronan closed the refrigerator instead and straightened.  

"I'm going for a walk," he said, then held up his arm and whistled to Chainsaw, who glided over to him. Casting a look at Adam alone, Ronan turned and walked out the back door. 

Adam sighed heavily, then waved a hand at Gansey and Blue's expressions. "He'll be fine. He's been weird since I found the letter this morning." 

"I think I'm going to take this opportunity to call Henry and ask if he's heard anything unusual," Gansey said, shifting to fish his phone out of his pocket. 

"What, like if Niall Lynch is still running around somewhere?" Adam asked. "What would Cheng know?" 

"Well..." Gansey shrugged a little. "I don't know. I'm grasping at straws, to be entirely honest, but Henry's mother ran in the same circles as Niall Lynch. If there's something funny going around she's bound to have heard." He motioned Adam and Blue to gather closer as he opened FaceTime. 

A moment later Henry Cheng's face appeared. He was clearly outside, wearing sunglasses and reclining on what looked like a poolside lounge chair. "Hey hey Ganseyboy!" He said, grinning. "And Bluebird! And Parrish! Where's the scowly one?" 

"Ronan's having a moment, he needed to take a walk," Gansey said. "Look, Henry, I've got a strange question for you." 

"Fire away Richard C, I've probably got a strange answer for you." 

Gansey shifted. "You don't know if there's been any talk about Niall Lynch lately, do you?" 

"Niall Lynch? As in the deceased progenitor of Parrish's nearest and dearest Lynch?" 

"That's the one," Adam said, leaning a little closer so he was in the camera's frame. "He um...wrote me a letter. We're trying to figure out how." 

"Curiouser and curiouser," Henry said. He tipped his chin forward, looking at them over the top of his sunglasses. "What did the letter say? 'Break my son's heart and I'll haunt you for the rest of your life'?"  

Adam pursed his lips, thinking it was a good thing that Ronan wasn't there. "Have you heard anything or not, Cheng?" 

"Hum, hummm," Henry sat back again, rubbing his chin. "I can't say that I've heard any rumblings in the rumor mill, but I generally try to stay out of Mother's business. I'll stick some feelers out." 

"Thanks, Henry," Gansey said. 

Henry gave him the thumbs up. "You don't think Mister Lynch is still alive and kicking do you?" 

"That's even less possible than him leaving a letter," Gansey said quietly. "I don't think there's much question of his passing to the other side." 

"Well, I'll let you know if I turn up anything," Henry said. "And you lovelies let me know if you need me to cut my home visit short." He leaned in to whisper conspiratorily, "Seriously I will take any excuse to skedaddle out of here. I'm going stir crazy." 

"You're welcome to come whenever," Blue said, resting her chin on Gansey's shoulder. "You know that." 

Henry pulled his glasses down again to wink at her. "Smashing," he said. "Alright kiddos I'll talk to you soon." He waved his fingers at them. 

"Bye Henry," Blue and Gansey chorused.  

Gansey set the phone down with a sigh. He looked at Adam. "Well, Parrish, looks like this is your show. What do we do next?" 

"I guess..." Adam rubbed the back of his neck and shrugged. He looked around the room and saw Opal was watching him expectantly as well. "I guess I'm gonna try to figure out what sort of offering I need to make, right?" 

"I'll talk to Mom and Calla," Blue said. "They might have something helpful to say. Maybe. What did the letter say again? 'You must offer a small part of yourself,' something like that?" 

Adam checked the letter and nodded. "Yeah, that's basically it. Thanks. Really." 

"Think nothing of it," Gansey said. "You know us, we can't resist the call of adventure and have a bad sense of when to stop." 

He and Blue exchanged an amused look. Then Blue rolled her eyes, leaning over to kiss his cheek. "Hopefully this one involves less death," she said.  

There were footsteps on the back stairs, then Ronan appeared in the doorway. He walked over to stand behind Adam's chair. "We gotta stop at the grocery store on our way home. We're out of a bunch of food shit. And laundry detergent." Glancing up he saw Blue grinning at him. "What, maggot?" 

"Nothing," she said. "I just love that we can go from letters from dead fathers to grocery shopping in one conversation." 

"Even magic dreamers still need to restock on peanut butter sometimes," Adam said. He got to his feet. "And laundry detergent." 

Gansey watched them. "I'm just impressed that you actually do laundry, Lynch." 

"Fatherhood will do that to you," Blue chimed in, but the grin she flashed Ronan was affectionate. 

Ronan gave them both a sour look, then turned to Opal. "Squirt go put your boots on. No don't look at me like that, do it. _Now_." 

Opal blew a raspberry at him but stood up and complied, going to pull on the lace up boots that Blue had given her. Ronan retrieved the letter from the table and folded it, then stuck it in the back pocket of his jeans.  

"Thanks again, guys," Adam said to Blue and Gansey. "We'll talk to you tomorrow probably." 

"Have fun grocery shopping and being normal," Blue said. 

Ronan, scooping Opal up and resting her on his hip, actually grinned a little at that before starting towards the front door. Adam followed, thinking that _normal_ might actually be a nice break, for once. 

*** 

Outside the day had gone from warm to hot. Cicadas shrilled away in the trees, the sun beat down, the air smelled of cut grass and dust. Neither Adam nor Ronan said much on the way to the Fresh Eagle, but that mostly had to do with the steady stream of questions Opal kept up about what she could or couldn't get at the store. 

Wooden spoon? No. Cheerios? Yes. Candy? No. Apples? Yes. Frozen fish? Why, for the love of God. Trail mix? Maybe. Crayons? You have plenty. Sponges? No. Ladder? They don't sell those there and you couldn't use one anyway. And so on and so on. 

Ronan, Adam was pleased to discover, had gotten better about the concept of grocery shopping in general over the past year. He actually followed the list Adam had written up, only straying from it a few times. He didn't argue either, though Adam was beginning to think that had more to do with him still being in some state of shock over Niall Lynch's letter than any real change of heart. Even Opal was quiet once they gave her a box of Cheerios to hold onto while she sat in the cart.  

The whole thing took a little under an hour. While they were waiting in the checkout like, Adam leaning on the cart handle and Ronan keeping Opal from grabbing all of the gum and candy bars on the rack next to her, Adam was struck with the sudden realization that here he was grocery shopping with Ronan Lynch before they went back home to make spaghetti and have a quiet night in. It wasn't even that they hadn't done this together before; he just still found it a little surreal. He tried to imagine telling the Adam Parrish from two years ago that this was where he would be _—_ a rising sophomore at Harvard, being incredibly domestic with Ronan Lynch when he wasn't at school _—_ and the thought almost made him laugh. But it was far from a bad thing. 

After paying for it all, they pushed the cart back out to the BMW. Adam started unloading the groceries into the trunk while Ronan buckled Opal into her car seat then circled back around. 

"I'm gonna go put the cart back," Ronan said, tugging the now empty cart away from Adam who was arranging things in the trunk of the car. 

"Don't hurt yourself," Adam called, absently. He could imagine Ronan's idea of 'returning the cart' being very similar to 'riding the cart into the corral very, very fast.'  

Adam closed the trunk with a bang, then jumped. Someone had come up on his left side while he was bent over and he hadn't even noticed. Now he did, however, and his entire body froze, an all too familiar feeling of anxiety exploding in the pit of his stomach. 

"Thought I recognized this car," said Robert Parrish as he looked his son over.  

 _Breathe_ , Adam told himself. His father looked older than he had remembered; or maybe Adam had just spent so much time trying to drive Robert Parrish's face from his mind that he straight up forgot just how much grey his father had in his hair, or how many lines creased his weathered face.  

When Adam spoke finally, his voice came out calm and quiet. He could do this. He could show his father that he wasn't afraid of him anymore. "Hello Dad." 

"You back for the summer then?" His father asked. "Looks like your fancy school's treatin' you alright." 

Adam nodded. He glanced surreptitiously to the side. Where _was_ Ronan? In the car Opal turned around, watching them through the back window. Her eyes were wide, hands gripping the back of the seat. 

"Take it you're staying with _him_?" Robert asked. 

Another nod. 

"You tell your mother that you're back?" 

Adam shook his head. 

His father's eyes narrowed. "This how it's gonna be, then, huh? After all that shit you pulled, the least you could do is be civil and say more than just ' _Hello Dad_.'" 

"I've got nothing to say to you," Adam said evenly. 

" _Ah_ _'ve got nu_ _thin_ _'_ _t'say to yeew_ ," his father spat back at him in an exaggerated drawl. "Shit, do you even hear yourself? You come back here actin' all high and mighty, like you're somethin' you ain't all of a sudden. You can put fancy clothes on a mutt but it's still a mutt, Adam. Don't pretend like you forgot where you came from." He gave a derisive snort. "Don't think even a rich faggot like Ronan Lynch can fuck the trailer park trash outta you, Adam Parrish." 

Adam imagined driving his fist right into that sneering face. He imagined brushing past his father, bumping him with his shoulder and giving him one of Ronan's frigid sneers. He imagined shoving him to the ground. This was what he had been afraid of; his father appearing, forcing himself back into Adam's conscious existence. But Adam didn't do any of the things he imagined, he couldn't move. Even if he really had wanted to strike his father, his body remembered every blow Robert Parrish had dealt to him and fear won out. 

"A rich _what_ now?" And there was Ronan, stepping up to Adam's side all cool coiled energy and poisonous fury. "Say that again, fucker, I didn't hear you the first time." 

Adam let out the breath he had been holding. He was at the same time both grateful for Ronan's intervention, and furious that he didn't have the chance to face down his father on his own. _Or the guts_ , said a small, insidious part of his mind. _You're still too weak._  

"Oh I think you heard me just fine," Robert Parrish said, rounding on Ronan with nothing short of disgust on his face. "You better watch yourself, boy. Niall Lynch had a smart mouth on him too and you'll end up just like your daddy with your skull bashed in, bleeding out in that expensive car of yours, you mark my words." 

Ronan was smiling, cold and dangerous. "Keep my dad's name out of your goddamn mouth, old man. You want me to kick the shit out of you again?" 

"You think I'm afraid of some punk-ass little fa _—_!" 

"You fucking should be, bastard." 

Adam grabbed Ronan's arm. "Ronan," he said, and his voice sounded stronger now. He gave Ronan a push. "Get in the car, he's not worth getting in trouble over." 

Robert laughed. "That's right, call off your dog, Adam. Or maybe think about getting him some training." 

"You can tell mom I'll see her only if you're not there," Adam said. He was still clutching Ronan's arm tightly with one hand. "I'm done talking to you." 

Robert stared at him for what felt like a very long time. Adam stared right back, and somehow that made more of an impression than anything Ronan had said. Snorting like a wounded animal, Robert turned and continued on into the store (to buy cigarettes, Adam knew. His father never did the grocery shopping). 

Opal patted one hand on the inside of the window, and said something neither of them could make out. Ronan ran one hand over his head and Adam let go of his arm so they could both get into the car. 

Adam sat down in the passenger seat and a second later felt a hand on his shoulder. "Hey Opal. It's okay." 

"Qui erat?" Opal asked.  

"My father," Adam said. 

Ronan snorted. "Father," he hissed. "I'd give him sperm donor at best." 

"Don't say that," Adam said, so angrily that Ronan actually turned and looked at him, lips parting in surprise. Adam took a deep breath. "I just _—_ _he_ said something similar once and..." 

"Okay," Ronan said quietly. He reached over and took Adam's hand. Adam let him, closing his eyes when Ronan lifted his hand and pressed a kiss to the back of his fingers. 

In the cup holder between the two front seats, Ronan's phone vibrated. Both boys ignored it. Ronan let go of Adam's hand after a minute, then started up the car and backed out of the parking space. The phone stopped ringing. It buzzed once a few seconds later, then again when they were turning out onto the main road. 

"What the fuck now," Ronan muttered. 

"Maybe it's Blue or Gansey?" Adam said. 

Ronan shook his head. "They'd know to call you first, not me. Whatever. Too much shit's happened today I'll deal with that later." 

Adam let the matter drop. He closed his eyes, tipping his head back against the headrest, the air conditioning blasting across his face, Opal narrating something to herself in the backseat. Niall Lynch and Robert Parrish. Two very different fathers. Thoughts of each of them chased around in Adam's brain, and even the music pulsing out of the speakers couldn't drown them out.  

Reaching over, Adam rested his hand on Ronan's leg.  

The thoughts quieted. 

*** 

Ronan slammed the freezer shut and turned to look back across the kitchen to where Adam stood by the sink, trimming the ends off asparagus stalks. Walking over to him, Ronan leaned against the counter, so close that their shoulders touched. He could see out the window to where Opal played in the yard, building some kind of nest out of grass trimmings and twigs. 

One thing Ronan loved most about having Adam there was the effortlessness with which they occupied each other's space. With Adam, unexpected touches never felt like an invasion, they felt normal, they felt like a confirmation that the two of them were meant to exist together. Neither of them would ever belong to anyone but themselves, but they did belong here, in this space, side by side. 

Adam put the asparagus into a container of shallow water and reached over to run his fingers absently up and down Ronan's spine. He too was watching Opal, though a moment later he laughed. "God damn, Blue was right. We really are getting domestic, aren't we Lynch." 

"I know, Parrish, it's fucking disgusting." 

"Yep. It's literally the worst," Adam said, laughing. "Maybe we should have the neighbors over for a Sunday barbecue." 

"God, shut up," Ronan said lightly. "I actually let someone put my email on the Singer Falls township mailing list how fucking gross is that?" 

Adam buried his face in Ronan's shoulder for a moment, stifling his soft laughter. Ronan grinned, pressing his face to Adam's neck. His skin felt warm against Ronan's lips, and they stood like that for quite some time, pressed together. 

Then, seemingly out of nowhere Adam asked, "Was your dad nice?" 

"What?" Ronan said, not because he hadn't heard Adam but because he was surprised by the question. Adam had never asked about Niall Lynch before, not like that, probably because he knew Ronan wouldn't want to talk about it.  

Adam turned so he was leaning back against the counter. He absently ran his hand along Ronan's arm. "Your dad. Was he nice?" 

"Where do you think I got my ability to be a complete asshole from?" Ronan asked. 

"I don't believe that," Adam said. He met Ronan's gaze for a second then looked down again. "Maybe he could be a jerk but I know he loved you." 

Ronan had no reply for that because Adam was right. Both of them had fathers who could be less than stellar human beings but Ronan's at least...Niall Lynch and Robert Parrish were different breeds of men on every level. Ronan had never been afraid of his father. 

Roughly six months previous Ronan had said 'I love you' to Adam for the first time. He had been visiting Adam for Thanksgiving break and after an afternoon spent in bed together, the words had slipped out without Ronan really meaning to say them. Adam had just stared at him. The look and lack of reply had stung Ronan deeply at first, until he realized that Adam had never had anyone to say that too before, and quite possibly, that no one had ever said it to him before either. The exchange (or lack thereof) still hurt Ronan, but for a different reason. 

"He would've liked you," Ronan said. It was easy to imagine introducing Adam to his father, but the minute Ronan did he felt a tight knot in his throat.  

"So the letter might actually be from him." 

The knot in Ronan's throat slid down into his chest, growing, tightening.  

On the counter, Ronan's phone buzzed yet again. Ronan swore, glaring at it. Adam just shook his head, reaching for the phone himself. He looked at the screen to see who the missed call and three texts were from. Giving Ronan a pointed look, Adam hit the call back button and held the phone to his ear. 

"Adam." Declan Lynch said by way of greeting. 

"Hey Declan, how'd you know it was me?" 

"Because my shithead little brother never calls me back, thank you for being the responsible one in that relationship." 

Adam let out a breath of laughter. "Sure, man. Look we've had kind of a shit day, what's - "  

"Dinner, at my house, on Thursday at seven," Declan said. "I would really like Ronan to be there. You too, of course. Can you make it?" 

"Dinner on Thursday," Adam repeated back, mostly for Ronan's benefit. Ronan looked deeply displeased, but Adam said, "Sure." 

"Great. Make sure he dresses nicely, please. I'll  see you then." 

Adam hung up the phone, setting it back on the counter. He folded his arms over his chest and looked at Ronan, waiting for the argument to start.  

Instead all Ronan said was, "I'm gonna show him the letter." 

 


	3. Chapter 3

If Ronan and Adam were headed down a path of rural domesticity, then Declan Lynch had bought an express ticket to white collar urban grandeur. The street in front of his townhouse was lined with luxury cars, all of them new enough and clean enough to make Ronan’s BMW look as tired as Adam’s Hondoyota. Or maybe that was just all in his head. Either way he wore a look of either disgust or discomfort as he found a place to park. 

“Jesus,” murmured Adam. 

“I know,” Ronan said. “Fucking Declan, man.”  

Ronan got out of the car. He had, reluctantly of course, conceded to a button down shirt and pressed dark slacks for the evening, and shoes that were not his customary boots. Now more than ever he felt like he was pretending at this normal adult life. 

The front door of the townhouse opened and there stood Matthew, waving cheerfully as they came up the walk towards them. He pulled Ronan into a hug, patting his back and saying, “Hey, you made it on time! And Adam, it's good to see you man!” 

“Hey Matthew,” Adam said, smiling when the youngest Lynch brother pulled him into a hug as well. It was hard _not_ to smile into one of Matthew’s hugs. 

Ronan nudged his little brother’s shoulder with his knuckles, then jerked his chin towards the inside of the house. “Who all is here?” 

“Oh, Declan and Ashley,” Matthew said, stepping aside so they could come into the small, brightly lit foyer. “Declan's mentor and his wife, then some other people. Declan's friends. Or coworkers, I can't remember.” 

“Must be coworkers,” Ronan said. “I can't imagine Declan having friends.” 

“Ro,” Adam said, but he was laughing quietly. 

Ronan smirked. It was fairly clear that Matthew was trying to get them to follow him out of the foyer, but the longer Ronan could put that off the better. Except that Declan was likely to make this more unpleasant if they made too late an entrance. For a brief moment he wondered if this was how Gansey felt whenever he visited his family—the biggest difference being Gansey could put far more effort into faking it than Ronan could. 

They went through to the living room. 

There were four couples including Declan (rising to his feet with a diplomatic smile when his brothers appeared) and Ashley (standing by the sideboard with one of the other women). Everyone was sitting around on furniture that looked like it had been professionally arranged. Ronan took a glance around the room and immediately thought Declan was trying too hard, overcompensating for the strangeness of their lives by attempting to look impeccably normal. 

"Ah and here we go—Everyone this is our middle brother, Ronan, and his—" Declan hesitated just a split second, long enough for Ronan to shoot him a mildly annoyed look. "—partner Adam Parrish." 

" _Partner_ ," Ronan muttered under his breath, and Adam elbowed him lightly.  

Declan proceeded to introduce his friends-slash-colleagues, whose names Ronan instantly forgot, and then finally the older couple seated next to him. "...and this is my former professor and mentor, Damien Pearce, and his wife Angela." 

"Mr. Lynch, Mr. Parrish," Damien Pearce stood and shook their hands. "A pleasure. I really was looking forward to meeting the rest of Declan's family."  

Damien Pearce looked wealthy. Damien Pearce _smelled_ wealthy. He wore a finely-tailored suit and thin, wire-frame glasses. His hair was white and grey and styled and when he smiled, all of his teeth were bright and even and the corners of his eyes crinkled pleasantly. He also had that unshakeable and irresistible  charisma that reminded Ronan—unnervingly—of his own father. 

Pearce asked them about what they were doing lately—when Ronan responded only with half answers, he focused his attention on Adam. Pearce had also attended Harvard for his undergraduate degree so the two of them had plenty to talk about, which was fine with Ronan. It was all the same to him to observe quietly from the sidelines. 

Declan had other ideas. "At least _try_ to look like I'm not torturing you," he murmured, bumping Ronan's arm.  

"Beggars can't be choosers," Ronan said. "You don't want me to look bored then leave me out of your networking bullshit." 

"Ronan." 

"Also— _partner?_ " 

Declan raised an eyebrow at him. "What's wrong with that?" 

"You can just say 'boyfriend,' if that's too shocking for people that's their problem, not mine." 

"Jesus, Ronan," Declan muttered into his glass as he took a drink. "Can we not do this tonight?" 

Ronan glowered at him but shrugged. "Whatever, man. Look, can I talk to you later? In private? We found something at the Barns that I think you might want to..." He trailed off, gesturing. 

"Sure," Declan said, giving Ronan a curious look. 

Ashley cleared her throat then, telling everyone that it was time to move through to the dining room.  

_Move through to the dining room_. Who actually said that. Maybe adulthood really was just a "fake it 'til you make it" sort of deal. Ronan walked close to Adam, resting a hand on Adam's back in a way that couldn't possibly be mistaken for platonic behavior, not in this company. Ronan looked at Declan to see if he had noticed. If he had, Declan didn't react. Maybe he really didn't care after all. 

 Ronan and Adam were seated on one side of Declan, directly across from Mr. And Mrs. Pearce. While everyone was starting on salads and complementing Declan's wine selection, Pearce looked to Ronan and Adam again. "Now, how long have you two been together?" 

"Oh, um," Adam sounded surprised by the question, and glanced at Ronan before saying, "A year? Year and a half? It doesn't feel like it could have been that long." 

Pearce smiled knowingly and nodded, reaching over to pat his wife on the arm. "That _is_ how it goes, often times. Still, it's good to find someone who balances you like that. Now Declan tells me you're also both good friends with the Ganseys' boy?" 

"Is there anything Declan _didn't_ tell you?" Ronan said, and Declan shot him a withering glare but Pearce just laughed. 

"Not much, it seems," Pearce said. "He also told me about your rather unusual talents." 

For a second Ronan's blood froze. He stared at Pearce, calculating. Pearce stared back, watching Ronan over the rim of his wine glass as he raised it to his lips. There was no way Declan would have... 

"Farming?" Pearce prompted. "Not many young men take an interest in that." 

_Farming_. Of course. Ronan's posture relaxed and he nodded in response to Pearce but adrenaline still pulsed uncomfortably along his limbs. "Yeah, uh...you know, family business." 

"College not quite your cup of tea then?" Pearce said, his tone surprisingly understanding. 

"Ronan's always been more of an independent learner," Declan said. 

Ronan grinned coldly. "That's Declan's way of saying I would've dropped out of high school if certain people didn't drag me by my ears." 

Again, Pearce laughed. It wasn't a mocking laugh either, it sounded genuine, which perplexed Ronan. Gesturing with his fork Pearce said, "I like you, Ronan. You're so different from your brother but not a titch less interesting." 

Completely unsure of what to do with that statement, Ronan said nothing and turned his attention back to his food. 

*** 

Dinner wrapped up and some of the guests left and others—including the Pearces—remained. Ronan cornered his brother on the way back into the living room. "Can we talk?" 

Declan sighed heavily, motioning further down the hall. The two of them went to stand by a window that looked out onto the back patio. Wordlessly, Declan folded his arms over his chest and looked at Ronan, waiting. 

"We found this—Adam found this—in Dad's old desk, you know the one in the sitting room." Ronan took the letter from his pocket and unfolded it carefully, handing it to Declan. 

Holding the letter in front of him, Declan took a moment to read it, his brow furrowed. Ronan waited patiently, chewing on his bracelets and trying to gauge exactly what kind of reaction his brother was going to have to the letter.  

It was not the one he expected. 

"You know," Declan said, folding up the letter but not handing it back to Ronan. "Just because I didn't run out and buy an ' _I love my gay brother_ ' t-shirt doesn't mean I'm upset about the fact that you're dating Parrish." 

Ronan blinked at him. "What the fuck does that have to do with anything?" 

"But _this_ ," Declan continued, waving the letter and acting like Ronan hadn't said anything, "isn't funny, Ronan. And I don't know what you think you're going to accomplish by it...Don't look at me like that, you can't honestly expect me to believe that Dad wrote a letter to your boyfriend. And I honestly can't _believe_ even you would do something this childish." 

"You’d think _I_ would _lie_ about something to do with Dad?” Ronan snarled. He made a grab for the letter but Declan held it out of his reach. "Look, man, I'm as confused about it as you are but we asked one of Sargent's—"  

"One of the psychics?" Declan said, dubiously. 

"— _yes_." Ronan narrowed his eyes. "I don't like it either but Dad wrote this fucking letter whether we believe it or not. God damn it, Declan." 

Declan looked at the letter again. "How." 

"I don't fucking know. None of us fucking know. But we're going to look for whatever it is he left for Adam." 

"Fine." Declan flicked the letter at Ronan. “But leave me out of this. I told you, as soon as I finish tying up Dad’s loose ends I'm _done_ with all of this magic bullshit.” 

Ronan caught the letter but he stared at his brother, then took a step closer. “Wait what do you mean ‘when’? You made it sound like you already did. Are you still selling— ” 

Someone nearby cleared their throat, preventing Declan from having the chance to answer. Ronan turned expecting Adam or Ashley but instead he saw Mr. Pearce, smiling apologetically. As Ronan watched he reached up and adjusted his glasses before saying, “Pardon my interruption, Declan, I wanted to have a quick word before we head out…” 

Ronan realized he was still holding the letter. He hastily returned it to his pocket before stepping past Pearce and back towards the living room.. 

*** 

It was late by the time they got back. Ronan had been lost in thought for most of the drive, but was startled back to reality when Adam spoke. 

"Hey, aren't we picking up Opal? That was the Henrietta exit." 

"Nah." Ronan shook his head. "I didn't know how late we'd be getting back so I figured she could just sleep over. She likes the Sargents, it's fine." 

Adam had already turned so he could hear Ronan better, but now he leaned in even closer, a smile playing over his lips. "Yeah? Or did you just want us to have the house to ourselves for the night?" 

"Huh?" Ronan glanced at him, then let out a barking laugh. "Like I care whether she's there or not." 

"Ronan." Adam rolled his eyes. "I was trying to...never mind." 

Ronan glanced at him. "No, what?" 

"Nope, it's too late," Adam said with an exaggerated sigh. "The moment's passed." 

"Like hell it has," Ronan said. He stepped on the gas pedal a little harder.  

Adam let his head fall back against the headrest and he laughed. Ronan smiled, brightly in the darkness of the car. He lived to hear Adam laugh. “Ro,” Adam said after a minute, voice still breathless with laughter. “Slow down. I don't really wanna get in a crash...” 

Ronan slowed down a little, but only because he could see the shine of tail lights somewhere ahead. He smiled again when he felt Adam’s hand on his leg. “Thought you wanted me to drive safe, Parrish.” 

“Get your mind out of the gutter, Lynch.” 

“Never.” 

They were still in a light mood when they got to the Barns, which lay quietly under the clear night sky, the surrounding fields dancing with fireflies and filled with the sounds of night insects. Ronan had just gotten out when Adam was there, pressing him back against the car and kissing him once, twice, and again… 

“Parrish,” Ronan mumbled. “Can't even make it through the front door?” 

Adam's hands were on his waist, on his bare skin having already tugged his shirt free of his waistband. “Does it matter? It's not like there's anyone here to see us.” 

“Mosquito bites in terrible places say it matters,” Ronan said, pulling Adam with him towards the house.  

Adam laughed, and there was a breathlessness in it that sent a thrill right down Ronan’s spine. Ronan let them into the house. The front hall was dim, lit only by the single lamp they had left on in the living room. The door closed and Ronan blindly fumbled with the lock as Adam had already pulled him into another kiss.  

Turning them, Ronan backed Adam up against the edge of a narrow table, knocking a precarious stack of junk mail to the floor. Adam gasped softly and sat on the very edge, his hands pulling at the buttons of Ronan's shirt.  

Ronan’s hands were fumbling with buttons and zippers. His teeth grazed Adam’s jaw, his throat, the little bit of collarbone that peeked out from his shirt. He slowed, drawing his gaze to Adam's face as he turned his hand to cup the hard bulge of his dick through the material of his briefs. 

“ _Fuck_ , Ro,” Adam sighed, eyes closing, head lolling, expression slack. He grabbed Ronan's shoulders, pushing his hips into Ronan's touch with another gasp of, “Fuck.” 

This was the dream: Adam Parrish coming undone against him.  

Drawing a shuddering breath, Ronan drew Adam out, the pushed his own pants and boxers down just enough. Pressing close once more Ronan got his hand around both of them, giving a slow, lazy stroke upward as his mouth found Adam’s.  

This was also the dream: Ronan thrusting his hips against Adam, hand still holding both of their dicks, squeezing gently. Their lips parting, tongues curling against each other, Adam moaning low and deep in the back of his throat. The steady _thud_ of the table hitting the wall again and again and again as their movements became less controlled. Adam's legs spread and Ronan between them.  

And also this: the way Adam looked when he came, his back arching, mouth open, moaning out “ _Oh, oh, oh Ronan-!”_ into the stillness around them and all of that drawing Ronan quietly over the edge after him.  

For a solid minute they clung to each other, gasping for breath, muscles threatening to give way. Sweat shone on Adam's forehead, but Ronan kissed the spot between his eyebrows anyway.  

He wiped his hand on his shirt, which he took off and tossed vaguely in the direction of the stairs.  

“Please don't just leave that in the hall,” Adam said weakly, letting out a little laugh.  

“I'll bring it upstairs with us,” Ronan said. He tucked himself back into his boxers then looked at Adam, who was beautiful, still on the table, face flushed, hair tousled, lips swollen, eyes shining bright and happy. “Hey,” Ronan murmured. “I love you.” 

Adam laughed. “Real romantic there, Lynch. Me sitting here all—” 

“Shut up, Parrish,” Ronan said, grinning.  

Then Adam said, “I love you too.”  

Just like that. Effortlessly.  

*** 

Eventually they did fall asleep, a naked tangle of limbs in the middle of the bed, Ronan's head on Adam's chest because he loved to listen to Adam's heartbeat. It was easy to fall asleep.  

It was easy to wake up, too suddenly in some late hour of the night. Ronan sat up with a gasp, eyes wide as he scanned the dark room, took in the curtains hanging still on either side of the window, the shapes and shadows of furniture in the moonlight.  

Beside him Adam stirred, mumbled, and opened his eyes. “You okay?” He whispered.  

What had startled Ronan was not the same thing that had woken him. He had already been starting to wake when he heard someone shout his name. Shout _RONAN!_ in an achingly familiar voice. His father's voice.  

“I heard my dad shout my name just now,” Ronan said, though the minute he said it he realized how silly it sounded.  

Adam frowned and rubbed his eyes. “I didn't hear anything. Maybe you were dreaming…” 

“Maybe, but what if that means…” Ronan stopped because Adam's arms had circled him, and Adam pulled him gently back against his chest.  

“Sometimes a dream is just a dream, Ro,” Adam said drowsily. “Even for you.” 

Falling _back_ asleep was not as easy. 

*** 

The following day, when Adam went to visit his mother he refused Ronan's offer to let him take the BMW. Instead he got the Hondoyota out of where it had been parked in one of the sheds at the Barns, gave it a thorough check over and drove that into Henrietta. He wasn't even entirely sure why; part of him knew he shouldn't care, part of him _wanted_ to rub it in the faces of every neighbor who had spent their lives turning a blind eye on him. 

_That's right_ , he wanted to say. _I got out of here and I'm going to school and I have a hot, rich boyfriend who lets me drive his expensive car._   

But he didn’t. Instead he pulled up in front of the familiar double wide trailer home, praying silently that his mother hadn't been lying when she said his dad was out fishing today. (Getting drunk with his buddies, more likely.) Up the front steps. Knocking on the door.  

His mother, when she opened the door, also looked older than Adam remembered her. Like his father, her hair had more grey in it, the bags under her eyes were darker, her face was more lined. She wore a faded t-shirt and paint splattered jeans and looked at Adam for a long moment before saying, "C'mon in." 

Adam stepped through the door and immediately the _smell_ of the place sent his mind careening back to his younger years so fast that he had to resist the urge to slump against the wall. It wasn't even a particularly distinct smell, but it was enough to conjure up the memory of coming home night after night when he finished work, of slipping past his parents while they watched TV, of making himself a dry sandwich or can of soup... He watched his mother go over and sit on one of the ratty, stained couches in the living room. Adam sat across from her. 

"You enjoying your summer?" His mother asked. They had kept up semi-regular correspondence since Adam went to school, just a few lines here and there, him telling her about his classes and Boston, her telling him nothing much about nothing in particular. 

"Yeah, we uhm, we went up to D.C. the other day..." Adam began, and he saw his mother's nostrils flare a little at the " _we._ " He paused, then pressed on. "My friends are back in town too so it's good to see them." 

His mother nodded, then shook her head  a little, picking at something on the arm of the couch. "I just don't understand why..." 

"I don't want to talk about Dad," Adam said, cutting her off. "And I don't want to talk about Ronan." 

"Adam..." His mother said. She gazed at him with her tired, sad eyes then got to her feet and went to put the kettle on the stove.  

Adam watched her. He sat on the edge of the couch, fidgeting for something to say. "You still helping watch the Jessup's kids?"  

That gave his mother the necessary jumping off point at least, a safe topic, the little kids down the road she minded while their mother worked her two jobs. Then there was the rabid dog that was there three days ago that they had to call animal control for. And the unseasonably warm weather. And how Tommy Smith—he used to go to school with Adam—got busted growing pot in his shed.  

Mostly Adam let his mother talk, and he nodded, listening, and said nothing because he didn't have much to say anymore that she would relate to.  

"I was cleaning the other day," his mother said abruptly, after having fallen silent for a moment. "Found some stuff you left, d'you want it?" 

Adam frowned; he had been fairly certain he brought everything with him when he left, so whatever it was couldn't be very important. Still, he nodded and watched as his mother went to get a small, ratty box down off the top of a shelf. She brought it over and handed it to him. 

Inside Adam found a folded shirt, some papers, and on top of it all a model car. Adam stared down at it like he had never seen a toy car before. There was no way his mother could know the memory he associated with the car, but for Adam it stood for every minute he spent aware of how little his parents had actually wanted him. Now, appearing here, handed to him by his mother, it felt like a slap in the face.  

For the briefest fraction of a second Adam closed his eyes, breathed through his nose. 

_I regret the day I squirted him into you._  

_This isn't what I wanted._  

When he opened his eyes his mother was still sitting across from him, looking worn down. 

"Thanks," Adam said, closing the box. He tapped his fingers on the lid then said, "I should probably..." 

His mother got to her feet. "Was good to see you, Adam." 

"Uhuh." Adam stood awkwardly in front of her, unsure of how this goodbye should go. His mother was not the hugging type, nor the handshaking type.  

"You take care of yourself," she said, reaching out to put one hand on his shoulder. "And keep in touch." 

Adam felt ashamed at just how much relief welled up in him when he stepped back out into the sunny afternoon. He made it halfway down the walk before he stopped; his father's truck was parked in the driveway, and his father was sitting behind the wheel. He glanced at Adam, then back down, making no move to get out. Adam took a second to catch his breath, then purposefully continued on to his own car. 

It wasn't until he was part-way down the street that he looked in the rearview mirror and saw his father going inside. 

*** 

Adam did not go straight back to the Barns like he had originally planned. Instead he found himself, without really thinking, headed to 300 Fox Way. He felt half asleep from trying to think about too many things at once, and realized he needed to talk to someone about at least some of it. He parked on the street and left the shoe box in the backseat as he went to ring the bell. 

Maura Sargent answered, and she looked surprised to see him. "Adam," she said. "Blue and Gansey aren't here..." 

"That's all right," Adam said, sticking his hands in his pockets. "Could I...I actually wanted to talk to you, if that's okay." 

"Me?" Maura looked even more surprised, but she nodded and motioned Adam inside. "Is everything alright?" 

Adam frowned, following her down the hall and into the kitchen. "I don't...know, exactly." 

Maura waited for him to sit then she got a pitcher of lemonade from the refrigerator, pouring a glass for each of them. She pushed Adam's towards him and sat down, her long fingers wrapped around her own glass. "This is about the letter? Blue and Calla told me." 

"Yeah," Adam said. He spread his hand on the table. "Do you think it's real? I mean, do you think Niall Lynch actually wrote it for me?" 

"I think," Maura said slowly. "That you chose a very strange and impossible family to find a place in." 

Adam smiled a little. "I shouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth, right? Would you go look for it, if you were me?" 

"Yes," Maura said, smiling. "But I'm not known for my wise choices." 

"I'm not really one to judge." Adam took a sip of the lemonade. There was a faint hint of lavender in it. He took a deep breath, closing his eyes. A moment later he felt Maura's hands rest lightly on his arm in a comforting gesture, her fingers cool from holding her lemonade glass.  

"You have a choice," she said quietly. "Always. Your potential is your own. Your life, Adam Parrish, and I mean _you_ specifically, is built of your own choices. Your family is one you made yourself. Your home is one you chose yourself. This, I think, is also a choice, whether Niall Lynch left it or someone else is not entirely relevant. But what I sense now, Magician, is that you have a choice of whether you want to delve deeper or let your powers go." 

Adam looked at her. He wet his lips. "That doesn't sound like much of a choice." 

"You are allowed to want a normal life, Adam," she said.  

He was silent then, watching the beads of condensation roll down the side of his glass.  

It was a more difficult choice than he had thought. 


	4. Chapter 4

When Adam got back to the Barns early in the evening and slipped quietly into the house he could hear Ronan clattering around in the kitchen. And as Adam moved down the hall he smiled to himself because he could also hear Ronan singing, very quietly, which must mean Opal was outside or upstairs because Ronan never sang in front of anyone, period.  

Ronan had a very nice voice, Adam thought as he lingered just out of sight, a bit guiltily, trying to catch a few lines of whatever song it was. 

"... _when the evenings mist, over mountain and sea_ _is falling, oh turn a_ _stor_ _, and then you'll –_ Parrish? I know you're there." 

"Aw," Adam huffed, grinning a little as he stepped into the kitchen.  

Ronan shot him a scowl over his shoulder. "My own boyfriend, sneaking up on me. Fucking rude." 

"But I like hearing you sing," Adam said, coming up to wrap his arms around Ronan's waist and rest his chin on his shoulder.  

"Too bad." Ronan set down the knife he was using to cut tomatoes and turned to kiss Adam. "What took you so long?" 

Adam sighed, rubbing the back of his head. "I uh...well I stopped at 300 Fox Way after I saw my mom, to talk to Maura, then I just...drove around a bit." 

Ronan's lips found the corner of his mouth, and his arms tightened around Adam. He didn't ask if Adam was okay, he simply held him closer.  

_Ronan was Ronan was Ronan was Ronan..._ Adam closed his eyes, sinking into the embrace, clutching at the back of Ronan's shirt, face nestling perfectly in the crook of his neck. But what was he? What was Adam Parrish? Adam didn't know how long he stood clinging to his boyfriend before he asked, "If someone gave you a choice, if someone...if you could stop being a dreamer, like you are, do you think you ever would?" 

"What?" Ronan drew back a little and looked at him, frowning. 

"You were literally born with magical powers, Ronan," Adam said. "And Blue's dad was a tree spirit. And Gansey keeps coming back from the dead..." 

Ronan arched one eyebrow, clearly seeing where Adam was headed. "And you're a magician." 

"Only because I made a deal with your dream forest! And it's not like I've really done anything exceptional since Glendower..." 

"So fucking what?" 

Adam sighed, bringing his hands up to press the heels of his palms against his eyes. "Every little kid wants to find out that they're actually magic, or _something_. And me all I wanted...all I -" He was embarrassed to realize that his eyes were wet, and when he blinked two fat, warm tears rolled down his cheek. "My parent's don't love me, Ronan, they never did. I knew that, even when I was little. And all I ever wanted was to _matter_ , to _belong_  and now...now I just keep thinkin' that someone's gonna come along and say 'okay that's enough pretending, time to go back now' because I'm obviously just faking all of this!"  

That was a lot more than Adam had meant to say. He felt ashamed and embarrassed at the deluge, wondering what had prompted it, what had made him lose his carefully maintained hold. Maybe it was the letter. Maybe it was seeing his mother. Maybe it was all of it. 

"Jesus, Adam," Ronan whispered, his voice and his expression unimaginably soft. "No." 

That was too much. Adam let out a choked sob, squeezing his eyes shut as though trying to hold back the tears that were now falling steadily down his cheeks. He hated himself for breaking down like this, for absolutely losing it in front of the one person who really didn't deserve to have to put up with this kind of crap. 

Ronan cupped Adam's face in his hands, thumbs wiping the tears away. "Hey. Adam. Look at me." 

Taking a deep, tremulous breath, Adam opened his eyes.  

"Just cuz you _made_  something happen doesn't mean it isn't legit," Ronan said. He rested his forehead against Adam's. "Hey. You don't fake your way into Harvard. You can't fake near perfect SAT scores. You don't fake the kind of friends that you have. All of that is real and _you_  are real." 

"Then why do I feel like this?" Adam mumbled. The tears were abating, finally, but they left him feeling drained and raw. 

"I dunno," Ronan said. "But it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. It just means you're getting into something a lot different than what you were used to." 

Adam nodded, sniffling loudly. "I know...I was just...sometimes I just feel so sure I'm faking all of it." 

Ronan was quiet for a moment, his forehead still resting against Adam's. Even like that, however, Adam could see the faint smile starting as Ronan said, "Well, I _hope_  you're not faking _everything_..." 

It took a second, but a soft laugh bubbled up in Adam's throat and he lightly hit Ronan's shoulder. "Ass." 

"Ahuh," Ronan said, smiling.  

Adam let out one last heavy breath then leaned back a little. "I do love you. A lot."  

"Hey, I love you too." Ronan kissed him, then turned to lower the flame under the pot bubbling on the stove. "You gonna be okay, Parrish?" 

"I think so," Adam said, wiping his hands over his face one last time. He looked back over his shoulder and down the hall to the front door. In the faint light of the front hall he could see the shoebox his mother had given him, where it was sitting on the table. "I want to look for the thing your dad left me," he said then. "And I know what I'm going to use as the sacrifice." 

*** 

The following morning Adam, Ronan, Blue and Gansey ate breakfast together on the front porch of the farmhouse. It was a cool, sweet morning, the sun gentle for once as the summer heat broke, though that was not expected to last. Opal played in the dewy grass, a bagel held firmly in one hand. Blue and Gansey were sitting on the two porch chairs, Ronan and Adam on the steps. 

Adam cleared his throat. "So, I decided I'm definitely going to do it. The sacrifice. I know what I'm gonna use I just have to figure out _how_  we're going to do it." 

"The letter doesn't mention any specific kind of ritual, does it?" Blue asked. 

"No," Adam said, and his shoulders slumped a little. "It just says to offer something that's a part of you." 

"Gee, thanks Mr. Lynch," Blue breathed. 

Ronan, to everyone's surprise, laughed at that. When everyone looked at him he shook his head. "Nothing I was just – Nevermind. Look, I know where we gotta do this." 

"Are you going to share with the class?" Gansey asked. 

"Cabeswater," Ronan said, then clarified, "Cabeswater 2.0. Dad might not have made it but it's still a manifestation of dream space so I figure it should be able to match up with something he _did_ make, right?" 

Adam pondered that and nodded. He looked to the other two and they nodded as well. "Alright then," Adam said. "After breakfast we'll go...we'll go give this a shot." 

*** 

The new Cabeswater, though it was physically the same place as the old one, was still a work in progress. But it was beautiful, and clean, and untouched. Silver squirrels scampered up the trunks of the trees, and when Opal whistled, a chorus of birds answered back, at least until Chainsaw screeched at them and they fell silent. Every color was bright and wonderful and _alive_.  

"Oh, Ronan," Blue breathed, having to stop for a minute and take it all in. 

"It's not finished," Ronan said, shrugging and sticking his hands in his pockets.  

"It's beautiful," Gansey said.  

"Whatever," said Ronan, before plunging forward through the trees. 

As they walked, Adam could feel little places where it was more unfinished than others. Places where the dream world was stretched thin over the real world like a piece of gauze. He wondered just how hard it was for Ronan to construct such a complicated place, all on his own, and thought about his boyfriend dreaming day-after-day to bring this space to life.  

Suddenly Blue gasped and jumped a little, bumping into Gansey. "Ronan?" She said, pointing. "What's that?" 

They all looked. To their left was a rocky outcropping, the bare stones glittering with quartz and flecks of mica. But shining in the dark shadows between two rocks were two points of light that were unmistakably eyes.  

Ronan was smirking. "One of my guardians," he said. "I'm putting safeguards in this time. _This_  forest can protect itself." 

"But _we're_  safe, right?" 

"No shit," Ronan said. "I wouldn't make them to hurt people I _want_  in here." 

They continued on. Adam couldn't tell if time was actually slipping in this Cabeswater, or if he was losing track of it on his own. Either way, he didn't really care. It was Saturday, his new job didn’t start until Monday, he had no homework, no obligations - 

"Here. This is the middle," Ronan said. 

They had come to a stop in a small clearing. At their feet, impossibly soft, impossibly green grass was dotted with little blue flowers. A spring bubbled a little ways away, shining metallic fish flitting just below the surface of the crystal clear water. Blue bent to pick one of the flowers and held it up, then rolled her eyes. "Ronan you asshole." 

"Hey," Ronan said, but he was grinning. "I didn't actually do that on purpose, Sargent." 

Adam peered at the flower and laughed. It was a perfect, miniature blue lily. Then he took a deep breath and looked around. "Okay, so...how do we do this?" 

"You're the magician," Ronan said. 

Rolling his eyes a little, Adam slung off the backpack he had been wearing and bent over to take the model car out of it. After a moment of hesitation he spotted a tree stump a little ways away and walked over to it, the others trailing behind him. Adam looked down at the car, then set it on the stump. The others gathered around him. 

"Um, okay," Adam said. He looked around, up at the trees, at the forest. "Okay Cabeswater, connect me to whatever it was Niall Lynch wanted me connected to. I know you can, now do it!" 

Silence. 

Ronan snorted. "Good job, that really got it going." 

"Shush, Lynch," Gansey said. 

But the forest did nothing, no hidden paths revealed themselves, no flock of birds appeared to lead them to a hidden entrance. Then, just as everyone was starting to give up hope, Opal broke the silence, tugging on Adam's hand and whispering, "Look!" 

Adam looked at the stump. Vines had begun to grow out of the bark, impossibly fast, twining up over the top until they completely covered the car. Then they began to push skyward, braiding and winding around each other until they looked like one thick, green trunk shooting towards the blue above them. Adam threw his arms out, pushing the others back a few steps. 

For the next ten minutes the tree – or whatever it was – continued to grow. It was much larger now than the original stump it had started on, and the green vines were beginning to turn the brown grey color of bark, but still it grew, throwing out leaves and branches above their heads. The light in the clearing was starting to dim, but none of the group noticed until Opal spoke again, this time in a panicked voice. 

"No!" She gasped, grabbing Adam's hand again. "No make it stop it's too much!" 

Adam blinked, but he instantly could tell that she was right. Not only was the forest dimming around them, it was becoming...menacing. In the dark the trees looked angular and wicked, more eyes seemed to peer out from the shadows. The tree in front of them, which was still growing, apparently was leeching energy from the dream forest around it. Ronan swore. 

"We must leave!" Opal wailed, now trying to drag Adam back the way they had come. "Hurry!" 

The others were noticing the sudden wrongness of the forest as well and looking equally alarmed. Gansey instinctively put an arm around Blue as he said, "I think I'm with Opal on this one, we should get out..." 

"No argument from me," Ronan said. He bent down and scooped Opal into his arms, and then they all began to run. 

*** 

Nothing stopped them from leaving. In fact, other than the unsettling dark and sense of things being not quite right, they didn't see anything terrible on their way out. It wasn't like the corruption of the first Cabeswater, it was more like a draining of something essential from all the living things in the forest. Still, the group kept running until they burst, breathless, into the bright sunlight.

Then they stopped, dropping to their knees in the grass.  

Adam reached for Ronan's arm. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "I probably just ruined your dream forest." 

"Nah," Ronan said, shaking his head. "I think...it'll be alright, it just needs to recharge." He straightened and held his hand out to Adam.  

Nodding, Adam let Ronan pull him to his feet, and followed him back towards where the BMW was parked.  

No one spoke much on the drive back. When they came up the drive, however, Ronan stopped the car before he reached the end, frowning a little. Parked near the house was a silver Lexus. Adam didn't recognize it, and neither, apparently, did Ronan.

"That's not one of your family's is it?" Ronan asked, glancing in the rearview mirror at Gansey. 

Gansey shook his head. "No and they wouldn't just...show up." 

"Maybe Declan got a new car?" Blue said, but Ronan shook his head. 

Telling Opal to stay in the car, Ronan and the others got out, warily approaching the house. They could see someone standing on the front porch, but they were in shadow and it wasn't until they got closer that Adam saw who it was.

"Mr. Pearce?" Ronan said, frowning deeper.

Sure enough, Damien Pearce was just coming down the front steps. He smiled when he saw them. "Ah, Mr. Lynch! Mr. Parrish. Excellent, I was starting to worry that I had the wrong place. I apologize for not calling, Ronan, but I didn't have your phone number..." 

"He wouldn't have answered anyway," Adam said, moving to Ronan's side. "What can we do for you?" 

"Well here's the thing," Pearce said. "I'm on my way to Nashville for a meeting and I just completely forgot to swing by Declan's to drop something off, I was wondering if I could give it to you, Ronan..." He held out the thick envelope he had been carrying. 

"Sure," Ronan said, taking it. He raised an eyebrow. "You're driving all the way from D.C. to Nashville?" 

"I can't stand flying," Pearce said with a vaguely self-deprecating laugh. "If I can at all avoid it, I do. Long drives are far less detrimental on my nerves...Ah! This must be the youngest Gansey..." He turned to shake Gansey's hand. "Damien Pearce, I've done some work with your mother." 

"Pleasure," Gansey said, flashing his most charming smile. "Your name does sound familiar. This is my girlfriend, Blue Sargent," he added, noticing Pearce's gaze flick to the side. 

Pearce beamed and shook Blue's hand as well. "A pleasure, my dear. Now, everyone, I'm sorry but I must dash, I'm on a rather tight schedule." He turned to Ronan again. "If you could just get that to your brother before the end of the week, and tell him I'm terribly sorry, things just got away from me this morning." 

"Sure," Ronan said again, nodding.  

Giving a little wave, Pearce turned and went back to his Lexus. They all watched as he backed up, then turned around and started down the drive. Once the car had vanished around the bend, Ronan turned back to the others. 

"Declan's mentor," Adam explained, because it didn't look like Ronan was going to. "We met him the other night when we went to dinner – Ronan don't open that, it's not yours." 

Ronan had been thumbing at the sealed flap of the envelope. He rolled his eyes when Adam spoke. "Whatever. It's probably just boring paperwork anyway." 

*** 

The rest of the day was considerably less eventful. Blue and Gansey stayed, helping with some of the work around the Barns as well as helping to keep Opal occupied. They left after dinner, leaving Ronan and Adam to a quiet night at home. It was decided that Ronan would keep an eye on Cabeswater 2.0, and once it had recharged they would go back and see what was to be done with the weird tree, and if it did have something to do with the letter. 

Around midnight they went to bed and Adam fell asleep almost immediately. 

Around two a.m. Adam woke again. 

For a moment he couldn't figure out what had woken him. He was lying on his side, facing Ronan who was still very much asleep, hugging his pillow, mouth open. Then Adam felt someone lightly touch his back. He started a little and rolled over.  

"Opal?" 

The little girl was standing next to the bed, her white blond hair sticking up, her eyes wide. " _Timeo,_ " she whispered.  

"What are you afraid of?" Adam asked, reaching out to smooth her hair down. "Come on, let's go tuck you back in." He stood up and held out his hand to her. When Opal didn't take it, Adam scooped her up and started carrying her back to her room. 

" _Canis extra fenestra mea_ ," Opal said, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. " _Terret me._ "  

The dog outside my window. It is frightening me. 

Adam felt a shiver run down his spine. He wet his lips. "It's probably just a fox or something."  

He took Opal back into her room and tucked her in once more, decidedly not looking at her window. He kissed her forehead and was just drawing away when Opal reached out and grabbed his hand. 

"Please make sure it is gone, Adam," she whispered, her little brow furrowed. " _Imploro_   _te."_  

Adam did not want to look out the window. He tried to tell himself he was being silly, that they lived in the countryside and near the woods and mountains so the possibility of a random dog wandering through their yard was pretty high. There might even be wolves in this area, you never knew. But something about the way Opal said it made Adam feel nothing but cold dread.  

Still, he smoothed her hair back and said, "Okay. I'll check." 

He walked over to the window and put his hands on the windowsill. The yard was dimly lit by one of the yellow floodlights on the side of the nearest barn, and peering down Adam could see mostly shadows. Shadows and...a dog. 

A black dog was sitting just below the window. It was huge, a little larger than a german shepherd, and completely black except for where the orange light reflected in its eyes. It was looking directly at the window, directly at Adam. 

"Jesus," Adam whispered. He could feel his heart pounding. The dog didn't move. Adam took a deep breath and felt at the bottom of the window screen for the little plastic sliders and pulled, pushing the screen up so he could stick his head out the window. " _Hey! Go on, git!"_  he shouted at the dog.  

The dog raised its hackles at him, but it did not move. 

" _I said get out of here!_ " Adam shouted again.  

Footsteps behind him in the hall, then Ronan's voice, "What the fuck, Adam?" 

"There's a -" Adam had turned to Ronan, but when he glanced back the dog was gone. He sighed and closed the window screen. "There was a dog in the yard. It was scaring Opal." _And me,_ he thought lamely.  

Ronan rubbed his eyes and regarded them both blearily. "A dog?" He sounded annoyed. "It was probably just a fucking stray or something. Come on back to bed. And you," this was directed at Opal, "go to sleep." 

Opal pulled the sheet up to her chin. Her eyes were still worried. "Kerah give me a kiss," she said. 

"You're such a needy little punk," Ronan complained, but he shuffled over to the bed and sat, leaning over to kiss Opal's forehead. "There. You gonna sleep now?" 

"If there's no more dogs," Opal said, her eyes drooping a little. 

"There's no more dogs," Ronan promised. He rubbed his thumb over her forehead then stood, holding his hand out to Adam.  

Adam waited until they were in the hall to whisper, "It was a pretty fucking scary dog, Ronan. The way it was just sitting there and _looking_  at me..." 

"I believe you," Ronan said, yawning. "I'm just not worried about it. Animals do weird shit sometimes." 

Maybe he was right. Maybe Adam was just being silly. Still, as they returned to bed Adam was grateful for Ronan's solid, warm presence beside him.  

 


	5. Chapter 5

Sunday dawned yellow and  hazy, the air promising of a heat to follow the otherwise pleasant morning. Ronan woke first, as he usually did, and for a minute he lay basking in the sunlight that fell across the bed. Turning his head, he gazed at Adam, fast asleep next to him. Adam lay half on his side, his arms around his pillow. At some point in the night his shirt had ridden up and his underwear had ridden down just a little, revealing a patch of smooth skin and the sharp line of his hip.  

Sometimes, Ronan just couldn't help himself.  

Moving carefully, he scooted down and pressed a kiss to that little bit of exposed skin, taking in the smell of cotton and the faint, not unpleasant muskiness that was all Adam. 

His boyfriend shifted, letting out a drowsy sigh. " _Huh_. Ronan..." 

"You should come to church with me this morning," Ronan said. Now he was tracing Adam's hip with his fingertip. 

"Wha..." Adam rubbed his eyes and turned, propping himself up on his elbow so he could look down at Ronan in confusion. "What?" 

"Church this morning," Ronan repeated. "You should come with." 

Adam frowned, looking more awake. "Ronan, your mouth is literally three inches from my dick right now, can you see how it's a little weird that you're asking me to come to church? Or are you about to give me some really cheesy line about confessing my sins?" 

"I'm serious," Ronan said, resting his chin in his hand. "I haven't seen Declan since Thursday and he wasn't super happy with me and now I have to give him that thing from Pearce." 

"I thought church was neutral ground for you two." 

Ronan shrugged. "Yeah but—no, whatever. It's fine. I'm not gonna force you to come." 

"I mean...I can come if you really want, Ro," Adam said. "You don't think it'll be weird though?” 

“Not really.” Ronan scooted back up the bed to kiss him on the lips this time. “I'm gonna shower and get dressed.” 

Leaving Adam to take his time waking up, Ronan showered and changed then headed downstairs to throw together a quick breakfast for them and Opal. The little girl could just barely be trusted to take care of herself for the few hours they would be gone, though Ronan was sure she would spend almost all of that time watching cartoons. 

The envelope from Pearce was sitting on the kitchen counter, and Ronan kept shooting it sidelong looks as he started on eggs and toast for the three of them. Chainsaw watched him from her perch on the back of a chair, occasionally ducking her head to preen herself. Opal wandered in a minute later as Ronan set the plates of food out on the table. 

He bit his lip. What did it matter, really? He went over and picked up the envelope, pressing at the contents with his thumbs. It felt like paper, folded maybe, thick and soft. Either that or… Ronan frowned. He could hear Adam moving around upstairs, and Opal wasn't really paying attention. He turned the envelope over and deftly slid his thumb under the flap. 

“Kerah!” Chainsaw squawked at him. 

“Shush you,” Ronan hissed, peeking inside the envelope. He frowned then reached in and took out two crisp stacks of bills. There were two more still inside the envelope. 

“Hey sorry I—" Adam began as he came into the kitchen. Seeing what Ronan was doing, he sighed heavily. “Ronan.” 

“There's like two grand in here,” Ronan said. He shook the envelope to show Adam there was more than just what he had taken out. The most obvious question of course was why the hell would Pearce give his brother two thousand dollars in cash? And why would he trust Ronan, who he had only met once, to deliver it? Forget the fact that neither Lynch brother _needed_ two grand, but it wasn't like Pearce would know that. Pretending to fan himself with the bills, Ronan muttered, “I'm gonna kick Declan's ass.” 

Adam gave him a look then marched over and took both the stacks of bills and the envelope from Ronan, sticking the former back inside the latter. “See this is why you shouldn't have opened it.” 

“You know what this means right?” Ronan said. “Either Declan's still selling artifacts or he decided to not go into politics and is in fact now a cocaine dealer for rich old white dudes.” 

“Maybe…” Adam scratched the back of his head and yawned. “Maybe it's a donation for something?” 

Ronan snorted and dropped into the chair next to Opal. “For two grand? He would've written a fucking check, genius.” 

“Okay.” Adam said. The clipped tone was a clear indicator that he was done with this conversation for now as he poured himself some coffee and sat down to eat. 

Ronan sighed and looked at the envelope again. Whatever it was, he had the feeling that their Sunday just got a whole lot more complicated. 

*** 

Declan and Matthew were just getting out of Declan's car when Ronan and Adam pulled into the spot next to them in the St. Agnes parking lot. When Declan saw Adam he raised his eyebrows. "Parrish. Ronan finally convert you?" 

"He's here because he likes doing things with his boyfriend," Ronan said. "Where's _Ashley_?" 

"At home because she was up late finishing a grant proposal," Declan replied. "You sure bringing your boyfriend along to church is a good idea?" 

Ronan curled his lip, then produced the envelope of money from inside the car. "You sure accepting two grand in cash from your mentor is a good idea?" He asked lowly as he walked around the Volvo to hand Declan the envelope. "Pearce stopped by the Barns yesterday, said to tell you he was sorry he forgot to give this to you before he left." 

Declan's face did several complicated things that Ronan couldn't quite parse out. He held the envelope tightly, then gave Ronan a long, hard look. "It's a federal crime to open other people's mail, you know." 

"Bite me," Ronan said. "That's not mail." 

"It's also none of your business, Ronan," Declan said. He ducked back into the car, shoving the envelope into the glove compartment and locking it before getting back out again. 

"I dunno man, you're accepting cash from older gentlemen," Ronan sneered. "Maybe I'm just concerned about your wellbeing." 

"Don't be repulsive," Declan said. He straightened his tie and tilted his chin up to give the effect of looking down the length of his nose at Ronan.  

Ronan scowled defiantly back at him. "Are you still selling artifacts?" 

" _Jesus_ ," Declan said loudly, which attracted a few disapproving frowns from the group of old ladies passing them. "You're a nosey little shit, Ronan, you know that? Fine, not that it's any of your business but an friend of mine is doing some contracting work for Pearce while Pearce is out of town for a meeting. Architectural design shit. Pearce didn't want to just leave two grand sitting on the kitchen counter for the guy so he asked me to give it to him. Happy? Or did you _want_ me to be doing something illegal?" 

"If it's under the table then technically you _are_ doing something illegal," Ronan replied. 

Declan glared at him. "God, shut the hell up, Ronan," he hissed, before starting into the church. 

*** 

Ronan had to give Adam credit; he managed to sit through mass without looking bored out of his mind. And he had to give credit to the rest of the church, because no one seemed to bat an eye at the sudden addition to the usual Lynch trio. Even Father Taylor smiled and said he was always happy to see new faces when he shook Adam's hand on the way out.  

As they headed back out to the parking lot, Declan glanced at Ronan. "You still don't believe me about the money, do you." 

"Why should I? You're a fucking liar most of the time and this is one of the sketchier things I've seen you do," Ronan said. He stopped, leaning back against the BMW and looking at his brother with his arms folded over his chest. 

Declan regarded him coldly. "You do know that most of those sketchy things I did were to keep you and Matthew safe, right? I know it's hard for you to wrap your head around but I've probably kept you safer than Dad ever could." 

Hot anger exploded in Ronan's chest and he started to lunge forward but suddenly Matthew was between them, right in Ronan's face because he was one of two people in the world who could get away with doing that. "Don't," he said quietly, his blue eyes wide and angelic and worried. "Please." 

Ronan settled for giving Declan the middle finger, then he pulled his younger brother into a hug. "I'll see you next weekend, okay?" 

"Yep," Matthew was all smiles again, hugging Ronan tightly before he let go and went to get into the passenger seat of Declan's car for the two hour drive back to D.C. 

On the other side of the BMW Ronan could hear Adam talking to someone on the phone, but he kept his gaze on Declan. The eldest Lynch brother took a deep breath. 

"I need you to just let it go." 

"Fine, whatever man," Ronan said. Then he remembered what else had been bothering him about the whole thing and he asked, "How did Pearce know where I live?" 

"I probably mentioned it once in conversation," Declan said. "That man's got a near eidetic memory." 

Ronan eyed him, still not convinced. "I don't like random people knowing where I live." 

"He's not random people, Ronan, I've known him for two years and I trust him," Declan said, firmly, confidently. "I know that doesn't mean anything to you but...." He gestured vaguely, then shook his head and sighed. "Forget it. I'm too tired to deal with you right now. Parrish?" 

Adam, no longer on the phone, circled around to their side of the car. "Yeah?" 

"You're doing God's work putting up with him _,_ I just wanted you to know that.” Declan said. He patted Adam firmly on the shoulder then looked at both of them. "Take care, I'll see you around." 

"Asshole," Ronan muttered as Declan got into his car and started the engine.  

Still lingering at his side, Adam asked, "Did he tell you what the money was for?" 

"Some under the table contracting shit his friend's doing for Pearce. Or so he says." 

"You don't believe him?" Adam cocked his head to the side. "That...actually sounds like a pretty reasonable explanation to me." 

Ronan took out his keys and gave Adam a look. "Except it's Declan. He's _never_ reasonable." 

Adam merely shrugged, then gestured with his phone. "That was Gansey on the phone just now. The Pig broke down." He gave Ronan a look that was half curious, half teasing. "You'd have thought that whatever genius dreamed up this version would've done something about that." 

Ronan's smile was wide and self-congratulatory. "Look, that genius didn't make it perfect, he made it just like the Pig, big honking problems and everything." 

"Well, that genius better have jumper cables in his trunk, that's all I'm saying," Adam said, rolling his eyes as he circled back around to get into the car. 

"Yeah, yeah," Ronan said, waving his hand. "Let's go save their butts. Again." 

*** 

They found Blue and Gansey leaning against the side of the Camaro just outside the Henrietta city limits. Blue was wearing a wildly colored asymmetrical skirt and a crop top, looking far more comfortable under the hot sun than Gansey, who was fanning himself with a folded map. Ronan maneuvered the BMW so it was parked nose-to-nose with the Pig, then he and Adam got out. 

"Ah, my gallant magicians have arrived to rescue me!" Gansey said, spreading one arm when he saw them. 

Ronan raised an eyebrow and looked at Blue. "He get heat stroke already? What did I tell you about keeping him out of the sun, Sargent." 

"He's fine," Blue said, rolling her eyes. She waved to Adam, who was already popping the hood of the Pig to take a look. Turning back to Ronan she asked conversationally, "How was church?" 

"Very church like," Ronan said. He moved to lean next to her against the Camaro. "What the hell are you two doing out here anyway? Do _not_ tell me if it's a sex thing." 

Blue elbowed him. "We were collecting herbs for Jimi. Don't ask, it's really boring." 

"I wasn't going to."  

Both leaned in silence for a bit, watching Adam and Gansey connect the jumper cables to the batteries of both cars. Adam went to start up the BMW and Gansey wandered back over to Blue and Ronan. "You two playing nice?" 

"No," Ronan said. He wrapped an arm lightly around Blue's neck and ruffled her hair, which earned him an indignant shout and a light punch to the stomach. Laughing, Ronan let her go. "One day I'm gonna actually teach you how to fight, Sargent." 

Blue put her hands on her hips. "Do it. Then I can actually kick your ass." 

"Hah!" said Ronan, but he was grinning. 

Gansey rolled his eyes and looked at his watch. "Hey, we should all go get lunch when we're done here. I take it you two haven't eaten yet? What do you say, Nino's?" 

"Oh _no_ ," Blue groaned, giving him a dirty look. "Literally anywhere but there. Please." 

It didn't look like Gansey was going to back down on that one, however. Shaking his head, Ronan decided to go check on Adam, who was still sitting in the driver's seat of the BMW. As Ronan circled around, he saw that Adam had his legs out of the car, feet on the pavement. His back was straight and he was staring out across the field next to the road with an expression on his face that looked...frightened. 

"Hey." Ronan tapped the roof of the car. "What's the matter?" 

Adam jumped, then looked at him. "I uh...what?" 

Ronan raised an eyebrow at him. "Geeze, Parrish. You look like you just saw a ghost. Well, not really. I know what you look like when you've just seen a ghost."  

"I..." Adam stood then, craning his neck a little. "I thought I saw that dog again. The one from last night. The creepy black one." 

"For fuck's sake," Ronan muttered. "This is what I get for telling you to read _Harry Potter_ isn't it?" 

Adam frowned at him. "Ronan." 

Sighing, Ronan pulled Adam to him for a moment and kissed him in what he hoped came across as a reassuring way. "Why are you so freaked out?" 

"I'm not," Adam protested. "There's just been a lot of weird shit going on lately." He looped his arms around Ronan for a moment, then drew back and gave him a push. "Go tell Gansey to try the Pig again. And that he should get a new battery when we get back into town." 

*** 

Ultimately, Ronan agreed with Blue. Nino's was not his top choice for a lunch spot. It wasn't because he didn't have fond memories of the place, it was because even in the summer you could still find Aglionby boys there, and Ronan tried to avoid them at all costs. And his reasoning for _that_ was that thanks to Gansey they had all wormed their way from ‘notable alumni’ to ‘school legend.’ 

"If they don't stop staring at us I'm going to go flip their table over," Ronan muttered, glancing yet again at the group of boys sitting by the window. 

Blue looked as well. "Don't do that. First, they look like they're twelve years old and would probably cry and _two_ , the waitresses would have to clean it up and I wouldn't let you do that to them." 

"Blue Sargent, always the poster girl for social justice." 

"That's not social justice, asshole, it's human decency," she said, flicking her wadded up straw wrapper at him. "Though all things considered you _should_ maybe consider caring about social justice." 

Ronan sneered at her. "Why? Because I'm gay?" 

"I'm just saying—" 

"Cut it out you two," Gansey said, looking up from his phone. "Ronan, don't be a dick. Just ignore them." 

"Who?" Ronan said. "The baby ravens or your girlfriend?" 

Gansey sighed heavily. He folded his hands on the table and looked pointedly at Adam. "Did he get out on the wrong side of bed this morning or something?" 

"It's probably because of Declan," Adam said, shrugging. Under the table he put his hand on Ronan's leg, squeezing lightly.  

"Oh, right, it's Sunday isn't it," Gansey said a bit absently.  "Say did you ever find out what was in that envelope?" 

Ronan slid a bit lower in his seat, drumming his fingers against the table. "Drug money. Declan's a crack dealer now." Blue spluttered out a laugh at that and Ronan smirked.  

"You're the worst," Gansey said. "I'll just talk to Parrish until you see fit to act like a grown up. Adam?" 

"I mean, it _was_ two thousand dollars cash," Adam said. "Declan says it's to pay a contractor but Ronan thinks he's full of shit." 

Ronan sat up a little straighter. He could feel a familiar sort of anxious energy building up in him. It made him jiggle his leg uncomfortably and fidget around a bit more than usual. Finally he wrapped his arm around Adam. Adam leaned against his chest a little, rubbing his thumb against Ronan's arm. Gansey watched them expectantly.  

"Whatever," Ronan said, sighing. "I don't actually have the energy to care about whatever Declan's up to. I can only deal with one supernatural mystery at a time and we've got to figure out what to do next with Dad's mystery quest." 

Blue raised her eyebrows at him as though to say that she didn't believe that in the slightest, but she didn't say anything. 

*** 

After lunch Blue and Gansey had to take the herbs back to Jimi and Ronan and Adam started back to the Barns to make sure Opal hadn't eaten the house in their absence. Ronan was still uneasy, though he tried his best to let the whole thing with Declan and the money slip from his mind. Maybe it _was_ just something innocuous and he had gotten so used to being suspicious all the time that his mind was jumping to conclusions. 

Then again, it was Declan. 

It was coming up on two pm when Ronan turned the BMW up the drive of the Barns. He had been starting to zone out on the way back and didn't realize anything was particularly wrong until Adam leaned forward and said stiffly, “Déjà vu?” 

“What the shit…?” Ronan muttered.  

Parked at the end of the drive was a silver car. As they pulled up next to it, however, it became immediately apparent that it wasn't Pearce; the car was a Fisker, not a Lexus. Ronan concern turned to bemusement as he got out, slamming the door behind him and heading up to the porch. 

Henry Cheng sat on one of the chairs next to the front door, looking entirely at home with his feet propped up on the wicker table. He looked up when Ronan clomped up the stairs, then got to his feet with a wide grin. “Hello you two! Please forgive the unannounced arrival, I was trying to surprise my better two-thirds but they weren't at home so I thought they would be here.” He offered Ronan his fist. 

Ronan begrudgingly touched his knuckles to Cheng’s. “Well they're not. We were just at lunch with them.” 

“That's what I get for attempting spontaneity, I suppose,” Henry said with a deep, labored sigh. “Hello Parrish! Nice to see your face in person.” He exchanged a slightly more enthusiastic fist bump with Adam. Glancing at the two of them he said, “I should go track down Ganseyboy and Lady Blue but first may I avail myself of your facilities?” 

“Sure,” Ronan said, raising an eyebrow but deciding not to comment as he let them into the house. 

After Henry used the restroom he joined Adam and Ronan in the kitchen, where Ronan was cleaning up from Opal's adventures with making herself macaroni and cheese while they were gone.  

"So," Henry said, leaning on the back of one of the chairs. "Any new developments with the mysterious letter? I'm afraid I didn't hear anything useful on my end." 

Adam glanced at him. "Did Blue and Gansey tell you about what we did yesterday?" 

"They did, and I was sorry to have missed it!" Henry said. "It sounded exciting." 

"Well, we'll probably be going back once Cabeswater 2 has a chance to recharge," Adam said. "And maybe we'll figure out some more that way." 

Henry nodded slowly, distracted by Opal who was steering a little car made of legos around one of the counters. Then Henry said something that surprised all of them: "I met Niall Lynch once you know, in Vancouver." 

Ronan turned from the sink. "What?" 

"When he was selling RoboBee to my mother." Henry's smile faltered a little. "Well, giving it to her, I should say. He came out in person and Mother dragged me along to their lunch meeting." 

Ronan was quiet, looking at him. He tried to picture his father in Vancouver, having lunch with Cheng and Cheng's mother. It was a weird, juxtaposed image in his brain, like two parts of his life coming together that never should have, despite the fact that he'd known for quite a while now that Cheng's mother had been in the artifacts trade and had not only worked with Niall, but Declan too. 

"I liked him," Henry continued, watching Ronan carefully. "He spoke to me like I was his equal, he didn't dumb things down and didn't patronize. Being thirteen and not all that good with English, it meant a lot to me." 

"Yeah," Ronan said. He wrestled down the urge to snap 'Why the hell are you telling me this' and instead continued to frown at Cheng. Then he offered, "Declan got his charisma. And his problems." 

Cheng winked. "Not _all_ his problems, I don't think. But my point is, Lynch, I realized while I was sitting on your front porch, that your father is the whole reason why I'm here, in Henrietta. And I wouldn't have met you two, or Gansey and Blue if it weren't for him either.  I was very upset at first when my mother said I would be moving here but now—now I wish I could thank him." 

Something snapped deep inside Ronan's chest and he suddenly found it difficult to breathe. Half of him was furious, the other half couldn't tell where the anger was coming from. What Henry said was probably one of the nicest things anyone had said about Niall Lynch in a while, but for some reason it made Ronan furious. It brought back that urge to break things, that restless buzzing in the marrow of his bones. 

His jaw clenched as he looked at Cheng for a second longer before he turned and, without a word to either of the other boys, stormed out the back door. 


	6. Chapter 6

After Henry left to go track down Blue and Gansey, Adam took Opal into the living room and set her up with a coloring books and markers at the coffee table. He sat with her for a while, reading while she colored, until he heard the back door slam and Ronan's heavy footsteps in the kitchen. Setting the book aside Adam slipped down the hall.  

Seeing Ronan looking in the fridge, Adam walked over to stand behind him. He rested his hands on Ronan's waist and kissed the back of his shoulder. 

"I'm fine," Ronan grumbled, even as he leaned back into Adam a little. 

"I know." Adam kissed his shoulder again. "I didn't say anything."  

Ronan stepped away and Adam let him. He moved over to open the cupboard next to the stove and stare vacantly at the cans and boxes on the shelves inside. Closing it again he asked, "You're starting your thing at Aglionby tomorrow aren't you? Kick something there for me." 

"What." Adam failed to stifle an amused laugh. "Just...anything? Just pick some random object and kick it and say 'this is for Ronan'?" 

"Uhuh." There was a wry grin starting on Ronan's face when he glanced over his shoulder at Adam. He kicked one of the kitchen chairs. "Like that. Except do it like you mean it." 

Adam laughed. "Right. And that will accomplish what, exactly?" 

"It'll make me feel better," Ronan said with a shrug. "Speaking of, you can take the BMW tomorrow." 

"You don't need it?" 

"Where the hell am I going to go? You're only working until the afternoon, right?" Ronan gestured, trying to wave away any protests. "Just take the damn car, Parrish." 

Adam sighed but nodded, leaning back against the counter. "Fine, fine." 

"I'll get you your own car for your birthday. A not shitastic one." 

"Ronan." Adam rolled his eyes, then frowned a little. "One, what am I gonna do with a car in Boston besides pay out the ass to park it somewhere? _Two_ , when I decide to get a new car _I_ can buy it." 

"No you can't," Ronan said. "Not a good one." 

Adam stared at him. He knew Ronan was doing this because he was stressed, because of Declan and the money and Pearce and the letter and what Cheng had said, but that didn't make it any easier to deal with, and it didn't make it fair. But they'd had this discussion before; Ronan _knew_  Adam's feelings when it came to money. Apparently he was just deciding to ignore them. 

"Dude," Ronan continued. "Matthew's turning eighteen in a year, which means that all three of us are getting our three million bucks to dick around with. What the hell am I going to do with that? I'm not talking about getting you a platinum Rolex here, a car is practical." 

"Use it for your farm," Adam said. He couldn't quite wrap his head around the casual way that Ronan said 'three million bucks to dick around with.' "Donate it to charity. Open an investment account since you don't seem to care how much money you have. Did you ever think that maybe I _want_ to buy things for myself?" 

Ronan was giving Adam a sharp look at that point, not quite one of his dangerous sneers, though it was the sort of expression that meant he was fully prepared to keep pushing buttons. "What are you gonna do if we get married, Parrish? Keep separate bank accounts? Tally whose money is going towards what and make sure we're always paying exactly half so you're not mooching?" 

"Jesus Christ," Adam said, staring at him. "Only you could casually mention marriage and make it sound like you're trying to insult me. And that's awful cocky of you assuming I even _want_ to get married." He wished he hadn't said it, but it was unfair of Ronan to just bring it up like that. Breathing heavily through his nose Adam looked down at the linoleum floor and said, "Ronan, I need you to stop doing this. I need you to say that you're feeling sad or upset and not start treating me like shit." 

Ronan curled his lip. 

"I need you to stop being an asshole right now," Adam said. He looked up at Ronan again, watching him intently until Ronan's shoulders slumped a little and he nodded. Then Adam added, "If we get married someday we can talk about your disgusting amounts of money but right now I need to know that I can support myself. You know that. We've talked about that." 

Ronan held up his hands and nodded. "Fine, yeah. But am I allowed to get you presents?" 

"Yeah just, I'll be real pissed if I come home and there's a...a Bugatti Veyron sitting in the driveway or something," Adam said. He desperately wanted to lighten the mood, and smiled a little as he reached for Ronan's hand.  

"Jesus, now who's making assumptions?" Ronan said, giving him an exaggerated look of disgust. "You think I'd surprise you with a goddamn one-point-five million dollar car to go grocery shopping in? Fuck. I love you but I don't love you that much." 

Now Adam let out a sound of mock indignation. "Ouch? Thanks a lot, asshole. What if I specifically asked for one?" 

"I'd say you're fucking nuts, but what color do you want?" Now Ronan was smiling, then laughing at the look on Adam's face as he twined his arms around his waist and pulled him closer.  

Adam leaned in, letting his lips hover an inch from Ronan's. "Bright orange. Like, highlighter orange." 

"Jesus," Ronan sighed again, then kissed him, "Now we definitely aren't getting married. You can go marry Gansey if you want an orange car." 

"Bright orange," Adam insisted, before returning the kiss. Drawing back he smiled and said softly, "Hey. Ro. I love you." 

Ronan half closed his eyes. "I love you too." 

They stood together for a moment longer before drawing apart and heading outside to do some yard work before dinner. 

*** 

Monday morning Adam’s alarm went off at seven thirty and he opened his eyes to find Ronan’s side of the bed empty. He yawned, stretched and hauled himself to his feet. After a quick shower he changed into a pair of dark slacks and a button down shirt then headed downstairs. The kitchen was empty, meaning Ronan and Opal were probably outside.  

Adam poured himself some coffee then paused when he saw the note on the kitchen table. It read simply “ _Sorry for being such an ass last night._ _I love you._ ” Sitting on top of the note was a perfect matchbox model of a bright orange Bugatti Veyron. Adam held it in his palm for a minute, laughing softly before he went outside to find Ronan. 

*** 

Morning rush hour—if it could be called that—in the Henrietta area was nothing compared to Boston of course, and Adam was both amused and deeply annoyed by how worked up people still managed to get. He had switched the radio from Ronan’s ear-shattering music to NPR, mostly because he felt like that was what someone should do while driving in to their new job in an office, and the soothing voice of the announcer did make the drive more bearable.  

He made it to Henrietta proper in plenty of time and without any real trouble—that is until he went to get on the road that would take him to Aglionby. Adam was just taking the turn when a huge, black dog ran across the street in front of the BMW. 

Adam slammed on the breaks.  

He found himself frozen, sitting there, staring. The dog, upon reaching the other side, stopped on the sidewalk, sat down, and stared back at him.  

The person behind Adam leaned on their horn. It took him a second to react to the sound, giving himself a shake and looking around. When he glanced back at the sidewalk, the dog was gone. 

Adam stepped on the gas, his knuckles white as he gripped the steering wheel. Three times now he had seen a large black dog. Being friends with Gansey for so long meant that he had stopped believing in coincidences a long time ago, especially not when it came to things like this.  

By the time he turned off the street and into the Aglionby staff parking lot (how strange that was, passing the student lot), Adam had calmed down somewhat, though his mind was still whirling. He barely remembered to grab the papers off the passenger seat as he got out of the car, then headed down a paved path towards the main administrative building. 

Inside the building, a sleepy looking woman behind the front desk smiled and took the papers from him then told him how to get to Calla's office. Adam had only been in the administrative building a couple of times in his time at Aglionby, and usually that was just to go to the main office regarding absences or late slips. Now he turned down a little back hall lined with glass doors, most of which were still dark.  

An old clock on the wall said it wasn't even nine o'clock yet. Supernatural distractions aside, Adam had still made good time. 

Finally he came to a door next to which a sign read "Student Records." A smaller plaque underneath that said "Calla Johnson." The door was open, but Adam knocked lightly on the door frame as he stepped inside. 

The student records office was a large archival-looking room filled with metal shelves, all overflowing with boxes and folders and envelopes. File cabinets lined the walls, and everything seemed to be a depressing shade of taupe. Just looking around for a few seconds, Adam could understand why Calla was often so cranky after she got home from work. 

Calla herself was sitting at one of two desks just to the left of the door. She held a steaming mug in one hand and had been looking at her computer screen until Adam knocked, at which point she glanced up at him. 

"You look like shit," she said, in lieu of a traditional greeting. 

Adam stepped in front of the desk and rubbed the back of his head. "Correct me if I'm wrong but seeing a big, black dog isn't a good sign, is it?" 

"You sure know how to start out a week don't you?" Calla said. She motioned for Adam to come around and sit down at the other desk, which was roughly perpendicular to hers. "Have you been seeing a big, black dog?" 

"Three times now," Adam said, fidgeting. "There was one outside Opal's window in the middle of the night, then again in a field when we were helping Blue and Gansey, and then on my way here one ran across the street in front of me. It's looked like the same one and every time it's stopped to look at me." 

Calla let out a sort of humph and leaned back in her chair, regarding him with a slight frown. Then again, her face was usually set in a slight frown, so that didn't necessarily mean anything. "Well you know they're usually an omen of death. Normally I'd tell someone in your position to be concerned except..." 

"Except what?" 

"Except we're on the middle of a damned ley line," Calla said, looking at him like he should have realized this already. "A ley line that you, magician, are deeply tied to. You _and_ your dreamer boyfriend. If you want my professional opinion it's an omen or an echo of _something_ , but your own personal death? Not very likely." 

Strangely enough, that did make Adam feel better. He took a deep breath and nodded. 

"Now," Calla said, getting up and going over to one of the waist-high file cabinets, on top of which stood a few clean mugs and an electric tea kettle. "I'm going to make you some tea then we can get started on the most boring job you'll probably ever have in your life..." 

*** 

It _was_ a fairly boring job, though Adam wouldn't say he hated it. Mostly he was scanning in documents from the shelves, uploading them to an internal server, copying information. Sometimes he would email someone. Calla had a radio going most of the time and every now and then they would pause to talk about something, and Adam decided that he did actually like Calla. She could be blunt to a fault at times, but then again so could Ronan. 

At two p.m. Adam was allowed to go home for the day. His drive back was, blissfully, devoid of any black dogs. 

*** 

When Adam got back to the Barns he found Ronan scraping the old, chipped paint from the front porch and stairs. At the sound of the car, Ronan stood up and pulled the dust mask he wore down so it hung around his neck, wiped his hands on his pants and dropped the scraper onto the porch before walking over to Adam. 

"Hey handsome," Adam said, kissing him. He was in a surprisingly good mood and wondered if the dog had been worrying him more than he realized. 

Ronan arched one eyebrow. "Really?" he said, wrinkling his nose a little.  

"What?" Adam folded his arms and gave him a bemused look. "You _are_ handsome." 

"Don't get all mushy on me, Parrish," Ronan said, but the way his eyes crinkled just a little told Adam he was mostly joking. "How was work?" 

"Fine," Adam said, wrapping an arm around Ronan as they started towards the house. "It's easy. Kinda boring but Calla's an interesting person to talk to." 

Ronan snorted. "If she doesn't hate you." 

"She doesn't _hate_ you," Adam said, rolling his eyes. 

They found Opal at the kitchen table making little crowns out of construction paper and trying to get a fairly recalcitrant Chainsaw to wear one. The raven was hopping between perches letting out little indignant squawks, and when Ronan appeared she flew to his shoulder, giving Opal a haughty look down the length of her beak. 

"I saw the black dog again when I was driving in," Adam said, in what he hoped was an offhanded way as he went to get sandwich things out of the fridge. "So I asked Calla about it." 

"And what did she say?" Ronan asked, leaning on the counter. 

Adam shrugged. "That it probably was just a symptom of the ley line and not an omen of my death." When he glanced over at Ronan he was a little surprised to see a look of genuine worry cross his boyfriend's face for the briefest second.  

"Jesus, it better fucking not be," Ronan hissed. Then he sniffed. "Or it could just be a _dog_ , you know. Sometimes strays follow you around." 

"The whole way to Henrietta though?" Adam said. 

"Look I don't know!" Ronan said, making a face.  

Adam held his hands up. "Whatever. Calla said not to worry about it so I'm not going to worry about it. And you shouldn't either." 

"Okay." Ronan leaned over to kiss him. "I'm gonna go finish up the porch, then I'll be back in." 

*** 

Later that night Ronan let Adam put Opal to bed while he cleaned up from dinner. After finishing with the dishes he went out to sit on the back steps, leaning against one of the porch columns. Across the field, he could faintly make out the silhouttes of deer darting for the forest in the blackening twilight. 

The door opened behind him and a second later he felt Adam's arms around his shoulders. "She's asleep," Adam said, kissing Ronan's jaw.  

"Cool." Ronan closed his eyes, tipping his head back. Adam rested his chin on Ronan's shoulder, pressing their cheeks together, and Ronan could feel him smiling. Then he could feel Adam's hand slipping under the neckline of is tank top, fingers splaying against his chest. Ronan let out a breath. "Parrish..." 

"Couldn't help myself," Adam said, and he was letting his Henrietta drawl color his words, opening every vowel and sliding off each liquid syllable. "You just look real nice like this." 

"That's not fair," Ronan muttered. 

"What? You do," Adam said, but he was also grinning. "Think you'd look nicer if you came to bed though." He paused, then said in a slow, sing-song way, " _Ronan_..." 

Ronan inhaled, heavy through the nose, light through his clenched teeth. The night suddenly felt warmer and more real. Adam's hand slid up from his chest to his jaw, turning Ronan's head to the side. The first kiss was light; the next kiss was not.  

"You said bed..." Ronan mumbled against his lips. His neck ached a little from the angle, but there were other more pressing sensations happening. 

"Uhuh." 

"We should...before we get distracted." 

"Uhuh." 

" _Parrish_." 

Adam laughed and got to his feet, holding both hands out to Ronan who accepted the help up because maybe, just maybe he needed it. A little bit. He kissed Adam again before pulling him back into the house, then quietly up the back stairs and down the hall to their room.   

Once in their room, Ronan kicked the door shut and nudged Adam towards the bed. Adam pulled Ronan along, their kisses becoming more and more heated until the back of Adam's knees hit the bed and both he and Ronan fell onto the mattress, breaking apart in breathless laughter. Adam scooted back, leaning against the pillows and reaching down to grab at Ronan, though all he succeeded in doing was pulling Ronan's black tank top off over his head. 

"C'mere," Adam huffed, tossing the shirt aside.  

Obligingly Ronan crawled up the bed to Adam, settling against him, cupping one hand to the curve of his neck while he kissed his jaw and cheek. Letting his head loll back with a sigh, Adam ran his hands down Ronan's spine then back up again. He spread his legs a little, letting Ronan settle between them as he gave a lazy, upward thrust of his hips that elicited a sigh from both of them. 

The next sound Ronan heard was Adam fumbling on the nightstand for something, trying to lean over without tipping them both off the bed.  

"Adam..." Ronan breathed against his skin. 

"Shh." Adam said. There came the soft pop of him opening something, and a few more seconds passed until Ronan felt the heel of Adam's palm resting on his lower back once again. "This is okay, yeah?"  

Ronan grunted, pushing his hips forward a little. "Fucking yes, Parrish." 

"Just checkin'. Scoot up a little more." 

Again he obliged, anticipating Adam's next request and reaching down to push his sweatpants lower, off his hips. Adam wrapped his free arm around Ronan's shoulders, his other hand creeping lower. Then with a soft sigh eased one lube-slicked finger into Ronan. 

Ronan closed his eyes, pressing his forehead into the pillow that supported Adam's neck. He swore softly, giving a slow thrust against Adam. 

"Easy," Adam murmured, and Ronan could _feel_ his voice as he lowered his lips to Adam's throat again. Adam was curling his finger, moving it inside Ronan, waiting for Ronan to relax around him before he slid another in. 

" _Fuck_ ," Ronan breathed, twitching a little as Adam pressed two fingers into him, sliding them in, and out, in, and out, then started to carefully and slowly work him open.  

He could feel Adam's lips touching light, slow kisses to the side of his face. He wanted a bit desperately to get his own hand between them to relieve some of the ache in his cock but that would mean moving his hips away from Adam's. Ronan let out a low grunt as he felt Adam pressing a third finger in, his movements still slow, and careful, and gentle. 

But Ronan needed more than that. "I'm good," he rasped after a little bit. "Adam— _fuck—_ I'm good." 

"Then get on your back," Adam murmured, turning them over.  

Ronan slid down, lying flat on the mattress. He let Adam pull his pants and boxers the rest of the way off, then waited patiently as Adam stripped out of his own clothes. As he listened to Adam open a condom he hadn't even realized he grabbed, Ronan closed his eyes, putting his hands on his forehead and breathing heavily. He grinned weakly when Adam lifted his hips a little to slide a pillow under them. "You're so fu- _uh-_ cking considerate, Parrish." 

" _Huh_ ," Adam breathed in reply, kneeling and drawing Ronan's legs around his hips. He leaned over, one hand braced on the bed as he used the other to guide himself into Ronan. 

" _Jesus_ ," Ronan moved his hands from his forehead, one clutching at the sheets, the other grabbing  Adam's forearm. 

Adam let out a strained laugh. "Aren't you— _ah—_ not supposed to take the lord's name in vain? Or when your boyfriend's fucking you?" 

Ronan made a feeble attempt to slap Adam's shoulder, but any retort was lost in a low moan. Neither said much for the next minute or two, Adam focused, Ronan lost in the feeling of Adam filling him, stretching him, and then a second later also the feeling of Adam's hand wrapping around his dick, warm and perfectly rough as he gave it an experimental stroke. 

"You feel so good," Adam murmured. He started to pull back, then pushed in again, all the way in, and if that didn't send a shock down Ronan's spine the sound that Adam let out did; an open-mouthed, uncontrolled gasp that might have been Ronan's name. 

It only took another one or two of those painstakingly careful thrusts before Adam began to move in earnest, rolling his hips a bit harder and faster as soon as he was sure he wasn't hurting Ronan. And Ronan pushed up to meet him, gasping or cursing softly whenever he hit one of those perfect angles that was all friction and heat.  

Ronan had let himself imagine this before, forever ago, but the real thing had unsurprisingly proven to be so much better; the feeling of Adam Parrish thrusting into him, the room filled with the slight creaking of the bed and the not so slight gasps of the two boys in it, Adam's skin shining even in the faint light, Ronan's overstimulated nerves aching for release. What it felt like to find that release seconds later with Adam buried inside him, and Adam's hand still on his cock and Ronan arching his back as he spilled across his stomach. 

And, of course, what Adam looked like as he came, eyes squeezed shut, mouth open, body straining through a few last, desperate thrusts before he collapsed against Ronan. 

"Jesus," Ronan sighed, again, when Adam drew out of him. 

This time Adam let out a soft laugh. "Yeah. Yeah." He flopped back onto the bed with a sigh. 

Ronan felt around until he grabbed his discarded tank top from the edge of the bed, and used it to wipe himself off, feeling too wonderfully worn out to get up and get a washcloth from the bathroom. When he was done, Adam curled close to him again, wrapping an arm around Ronan's waist. 

Ronan closed his eyes. He rested his hand on Adam's arm, brushing his thumb lightly against his skin. 

Sleep came, easily and quickly. 

*** 

The forest looked like Cabeswater.  

The old Cabeswater that is, back when it could be wild and dark and dangerous. Ronan could not tell what time of day or night it was; a dreamish blue-grey light diffused through the forest, making shadows both softer and more threatening. Every now and then a branch cracked loud and sharp somewhere deeper in the trees.  

Ronan looked around, then he saw Adam just ahead of him, his back turned.  

"Parrish!" Ronan shouted, cupping his hands around his mouth. The shout was muffled, like Ronan was surrounded by fog. Another branch broke somewhere and the sound echoed off the trees. Ronan took a few steps forward. "Adam!" 

Adam turned around. For a split second Ronan's stomach lurched as he thought that Adam's face was missing—then he realized that Adam was wearing a stag's skull pulled down over his face like a mask. In the twilight of the woods the bare bone shone white, and the antlers curling above his head looked almost silver.  

"Adam!" Ronan said again. "What are you—" 

A loud noise sounded just behind Ronan and the bark of a nearby tree exploded as the bullet struck it. Ronan's cheek burned and when he touched it, his fingers came away bloodied. He swore just as another shot sounded. 

Adam turned and ran. Letting out a wordless shout Ronan ran after him. 

They charged through the undergrowth, dodging fallen trees and rocks and leaping over small, sickly little streams. Ronan was amazed at how he managed to keep his footing as the ground beneath the greenery was slick and muddy. Adam ran ahead of him, never quite out of sight but with incredible grace and nimbleness, occasionally ducking his head so as not to catch his antlers on a low hanging branch. 

More shots fired. Adam sped up, and now Ronan could no longer see him, he could only hear the cracking of gunshots that did not sound all that different from the snapping of branches. 

Then all at once the trees ended. Ronan skidded to a halt in a foggy little clearing, looking around. Something in the tall grass ahead of him shifted and he heard a weak groan. 

"Adam!" Ronan shouted, plunging forward again. 

Adam lay on his back, blood soaking through his shirt from a shot that had apparently gone right through his chest. The grass beneath him was also impossibly dark and drenched. Ronan dropped to his knees beside him, fingers fumbling for the edges of the skull, remembering another nightmare, another mask... 

But the stag skull came away cleanly, and there was Adam's face, but he was clearly fading.  

"No," Ronan ground out. "No, you bastard you can't—you can't do this to me, Adam come on, _fuck_!" He cupped Adam's face in his hands, pulling him up, leaning over to kiss Adam's cooling lips again and again. 

A sharp click. Something pressed to the back of Ronan's head. Slowly he straightened, Adam still in his arms. Glancing down he could see Adam's eyes wide, and glossy, and dead. Somehow he could just make out a faint reflection of their attacker; a man, wearing a suit and wire rimmed glasses. He thought he might recognize him. 

The next bang did not stop echoing. 

*** 

Ronan woke to the sound of Adam shouting. The genuine terror in his voice was heart wrenching, and worse still Ronan could not move to reassure him. He had brought something back with him from the dream and did not want to think about what it was. 

" _RONAN_! Jesus Christ, fuck, _fuck_ —Ronan please move, baby _please_ please oh god—" 

"Adam!" Finally Ronan's body responded to his brain's frantic commands and he sat bolt upright. Adam had turned on the bedside lamp but Ronan’s first instinct was to pull his boyfriend into a tight, fierce embrace. He could figure out what the matter was later. 

“Oh god,” Adam moaned unhappily, clutching at Ronan. “Oh god, you're okay. God. _God,_ I think I'm gonna be sick.” 

Ronan drew back, and only then did he finally look down at the bed. 

It was awful. 

It reminded him instantly of when he found his father's body: blood soaked his pillow and the sheet on his side of the bed, blood and little bits of red and white and grey stuff that Ronan did not want to think about too much. Remembering the feel of the gun pressed to his skull Ronan raised one hand to touch the back of his head. His fingers shook; he was afraid of what he might find. Other than being covered in sticky blood, however, he seemed to be fine. 

Small footsteps sounded in the hall then the door flew open as Opal burst in. Letting out a wordless gasp, Adam sprang off the bed and scooped her up, putting one hand over her eyes, though Opal didn't like that very much. 

“Kerah!!” she wailed, grabbing at Adams hand and trying to pry it off her face. “ _Kerah!”_  

“Shh Jesus I'm fine,” Ronan said, getting to his feet and going to put a hand on her arm. “I'm ok, squirt, I'm right here.” 

Opal tried to tip back in Adam’s arms, letting out another piteous wail. Sighing, Adam uncovered her eyes. There was no way she could miss the blood that had gotten everywhere, but despite that her crying stopped and she simply looked at Ronan with wide eyes. 

“I had a bad dream,” Ronan said, lamely. “I'm okay. I'm lucky I just brought the splatter back and not the actual injury.” 

Adam closed his eyes, letting out a harsh breath. “Jesus,” he muttered again. “I thought you had that's why I lost it.” 

“It's okay,” Ronan said. Forgetting that he was covered in gore, he pulled Adam and Opal into a hug. Adam was shaking, which made Ronan hug them even tighter, sighing again, "It's okay."  

They stood in the slightly messy embrace for a good minute before Ronan drew away. He reluctantly looked at the bed. "I guess we should, uh, clean up...we can sleep in my parent's room tonight, I'm pretty sure this mattress is ruined now..." 

Still holding Opal, Adam nodded, but his face was still blanched and his expression strained. 

Ronan was fairly sure that things were not, in fact, okay. 


	7. Chapter 7

The following morning  Ronan and Opal were in the kitchen when Adam came downstairs, Opal sitting at the table while Ronan wrestled her hooves into the boots he had dreamed up for her. Hearing Adam’s footsteps, Ronan turned. “Hey. There’s food and coffee.” 

“Thanks,” Adam said. “What are you two doing?" 

Opal bounced a little in her seat. "Taking you to work, Adam!" 

Ronan looked up again and saw the look on his boyfriend's face. "Don’t," he said. "I was gonna stop by and see Gansey and them anyway." 

"Uhuh." Adam took the slice of toast waiting for him in the toaster and a scoop of eggs from the pan on the stove, then sat down. He looked pointedly at Ronan. "I can take myself to work, Ronan, you don't _have_ to—" 

"I know I don't fucking _have_ to do anything," Ronan said, and even he thought he sounded suspiciously defensive.  

Adam raised an eyebrow. "Is this about your nightmare?" 

Ronan stood, having finished with Opal's shoes finally. He shrugged and slid into the chair across from Adam's. He wasn't about to admit it but the lingering anxiety from the dream _was_ part of the reason that he wanted to keep Adam close; somehow he couldn't shake that image of the deer skull mask coming away to reveal Adam's fading eyes. 

And Adam, he was fairly sure, knew that. 

*** 

The drive into town was fast and uneventful. Ronan did his best to look thoroughly disgusted with being on Aglionby property again, but he kissed Adam goodbye and watched as he walked from the car to the admin building, waiting until Adam had disappeared through the doors before he started to turn the car around. 

"I'm hungry!" Opal shouted. 

Ronan paused, glaring at her in the rearview mirror. "I asked you if you wanted something before we left and you said no." 

"Wasn’t hungry then, I am now," she said, her eyes wide. "Keraaaaaah. I want an egg McMuffin." 

" _God_. Why. That's barely even food," Ronan said, but he was already thinking of the easiest way to swing by McDonald's on the way to 300 Fox Way. "Ms. Sargent probably has eggs and shit at her place she'd make you—" 

Opal keeled sideways, wailing, "I'm _dyyyyyyiiiiiinnnngggg_...." 

Ronan shook his head, tuning her out as he pulled the car back onto the main road. 

*** 

Fifteen minutes later Ronan rang the bell at 300 Fox Way. It was answered by Orla who for a long minute leaned on the door frame, taking in the sight of Ronan with Opal on one hip and a McDonald's bag clutched in his hand. "You are just one pleasing enigma after another aren't you?" 

"He's got a boyfriend, Orla, leave him alone," came Blue Sargent's voice as she elbowed her cousin out of the way. "Hey Ronan, I didn't know you were coming over." 

Opal waved at Blue. "We took Adam to work then Kerah got me breakfast." 

"Reluctantly," Ronan said, because he did have an image to maintain. Casting Orla the flatest look imaginable, he stepped around her into the front hall, then followed Blue through to the kitchen. There they found Maura doing something at one of the counters with what were either unusual spices or teas (or possibly both), though she turned to greet Ronan and Opal. 

Opal wiggled down out of Ronan's arms and took her food over to the table. 

Blue watched her with a wide grin. "You're such a good dad, Ronan." 

"Bite me, Maggot," Ronan said, dropping into a seat. "Where's Cheng and Gansey?" 

"Asleep," Blue said, rolling her eyes. She sat down across from Ronan. "We weren't even up that late. Speaking of, you look exhausted." 

Ronan made a dismissive sound, but it can't have been very convincing because even Maura glanced over from where she was standing to raise an eyebrow at him. Unconsciously Ronan rubbed the back of his head. Letting himself think too much about what _could_ have happened was dangerous; he could have brought the injury with him, which would have meant death and then he, Opal, Matthew...they all would have been gone, just like that. And that wasn't even counting what it would do to Adam, to Gansey, even to Blue and Cheng... 

"Ronan?" Blue sounded surprised. Surprised and genuinely concerned. "Did...did something happen?" 

It was only then that Ronan realized he had let his face go a bit slack. "I'm fine," he snapped. 

"Kerah had a nightmare," Opal said, helpfully. "There was blood." 

Blue gazed silently at Ronan, waiting. 

"It was just a _dream_ ," Ronan said, but the question in Blue's expression did not lessen, so he sighed loudly before recounting the dream to her, and to Maura, who had paused what she was doing to turn and listen. Blue's eyebrows rose as he spoke, and by the time he got to the part about waking up covered in blood, her mouth was hanging open. "So...yeah," he finished. "I think I'm allowed to be a little on edge today." 

"You're always on edge," Blue said, which was only slightly true. 

"I'm gonna have to burn the fucking mattress though," Ronan said, looking down and tracing a stain on the table with his thumb. "I don't need anyone thinking I murdered someone on it." 

"The head does bleed quite a bit," Maura said absently. She was still leaning back against the counter, her expression glazed. When both teens turned to look at her she gave a little start, then shook her head. "That does sound prophetic to me." 

Blue looked horrified. "Mom!" 

"Prophetic dreams are rarely literal, Blue," Maura said. She cast a look to Ronan. "I don't mean you're going to get shot in the head. But that does seem laden with symbols, don't you think?" 

Ronan raised an eyebrow. "I'm not a psychic. I take things out of my dreams, I don't predict the future with them." 

"Were you doing anything remotely ritualistic before you had the dream?" Maura asked. "Or was Adam scrying?" 

"Or did you two have sex before you went to sleep?"  

Everyone, including Opal, turned to stare at Orla, who had apparently been standing in the doorway long enough to hear the last part of the conversation. 

Ronan was so taken aback by the question that he gaped at her for several seconds before managing a gruff, "The _fuck..._?" 

"Well?" Orla said. 

Maura was starting to look as dangerous as Ronan felt. "Orla." 

"It's a legitimate question," Orla said, looking at her aunt for a second before turning her gaze back to Ronan. Across the table Blue had her hands over her face. Orla rolled her eyes. "Sex magic is an actual, real thing." Apparently she mistook the looks she was getting for interest, as she walked over to the table and continued, “It's all about bolstering energy, you know? And yes you can absolutely do it by accident, especially if you're a magician and a dream creature who happen to live on a ley line.” 

There were several things Ronan wanted to say at that moment. On a good day he found Orla obnoxious; at times like now the feeling was more like repellent. “I'm not a fucking _creature_ ,” was what Ronan did say. What he didn't say was that he wasn't too thrilled with his sex life being the topic of a group discussion. 

“You know what I mean,” Orla said, waving her hand. “Maura back me up, you know I'm not wrong.” 

Maura sighed heavily and leaned back against the counter. “I think you could have been a little more tactful in your delivery but no, you're not wrong.” 

“Wait,” Blue said. “So does this mean that every time Ronan and Adam have—” 

“ _Jesus,_ ” Ronan hissed. “I'm not talking about the sex I have with my boyfriend, I don't care how fucking magical it is.” 

“…what on earth did we just walk in on.” This was Gansey, as he and Henry stepped into the kitchen, both wide-eyed and deeply amused. 

Ronan closed his eyes, rubbing his forehead with his fingertips. He wondered if he fell asleep right then if he could dream up some way to just _not_ be in the middle of whatever it was. Opal patted his arm reassuringly, her fingers a little greasy from the food she'd been eating.  

“Ronan and Adam accidentally did some sex magic and then Ronan had a dream that ended with him getting shot in the head,” Blue said, then yelped when Ronan kicked her under the table. 

Gansey walked over to stand behind Blue, putting his hands on her shoulders. “Ronan be nice to Jane. Jane, I think Ronan is uncomfortable with this course of discussion.” Even as he said it his eyes were turned up in a slight smile, which meant that he didn't actually want to stop anything but felt that he should be diplomatic. 

“If it _was_ prophetic,” Ronan said, looking at Maura, “What the hell does it mean?” 

“Well,” Maura said slowly. “If we want to go with the Occam’s Razor of dream interpretations I would say it's got something to do with your father’s letter and the fact that someone or something is hunting for it as well and plans to destroy you and Adam along the way.” 

Blue stiffened, the mirth fading from her face. “I thought you said it wasn't literal.” 

“I meant it might not literally be a gunshot,” Maura said, turning back to whatever she had been working on. 

Ronan rested his elbows on the table, letting out a long sigh. He found himself thinking about Adam’s black dog; there was no way that could be a coincidence. If someone else _had_ found out about the letter it would mean that their leisurely quest had just turned into a race. 

_In the wrong hands it will be dangerous at best, catastrophic at worst._  

That was what the letter had said. It made him think that his father had suspected that whatever the thing was, other people might try to go after it. Great, just great, Ronan thought, squeezing his eyes shut again. He heard footsteps that sounded like Maura’s and Orla’s leaving the kitchen. A hand settled on Ronan's shoulder briefly. 

Henry winked at Ronan when he looked up. “There he is! So what do you think?” 

Ronan must have missed a chunk of conversation. “About what?” 

“The next course of action,” said Gansey, who had taken a seat on Blue’s other side. “Of course, if we were smart we would stop looking for this thing.” 

“If…we…were…smart…” Henry said slowly. “That doesn't sound like us.” 

Despite himself, Ronan smirked. “Cheng’s right.”  

Henry put a hand to his chest and beamed. 

“I guess the next step would be to go back and see what happened to the forest,” Blue suggested. “We don't know if it was able to recharge or whatever, or if that weird tree that started growing destroyed it.” 

“I'll check on it,” Ronan said. “If that thing set off any of the safeguards it'll be safer if it's me poking around.” 

Gansey, who was absently folding up the empty McDonald’s bag from Opal's breakfast, nodded, though he still didn't look very pleased. “All of this just keeps striking me as a lot of unnecessary risk.” 

“Party pooper,” Ronan said. “Since when are you such a wet blanket? And don't talk to me about unnecessary risk, we all know that's bullshit. Why are you really worried? I'm the one who woke up covered in blood—I'm the one who should be worried.” 

“That's just it,” Gansey said. He looked up, focusing on Ronan as he murmured, “You've finally got something good going on, why would you risk it on the possibility that your father left some new magic toy for Adam?” 

If Ronan had been in a better mood he would have reminded them of the part of the letter that said the thing would be dangerous if someone other than Adam found it. But he had been tense before he even got to 300 Fox Way and Orla and Maura and everyone else had just made it worse. So instead of saying anything reassuring, Ronan curled his lip, smirking as he said, “Hey it's just what I do.” 

*** 

Ronan and Opal spent the day with the others, first at 300 Fox Way for a while then moving to the park so Opal (and Blue and Henry) could burn off some excess energy. When lunchtime rolled around they went to Nino's, and Ronan got a couple slices wrapped up to bring to Adam when he and Opal finally went to pick him up from Aglionby. 

On the way home Ronan took advantage of Adam being occupied with eating to say, "I'm going to check up on the forest tomorrow while you're at work." 

"Mmph?" Adam mumbled, looking at him. 

"To see if your giant tree stopped growing and try to figure out what we need to do next." 

Adam's brow furrowed deeply and Ronan had no trouble telling what that was about.  

"I'll be careful, I promise." 

"You're not gonna do anything, right?" Adam asked. "You're just going to go check on things?" 

Ronan rolled his eyes. " _Yes_. And to make sure no one else has been there." 

"I thought you said you'd put safeguards in." 

"I did," Ronan said. "But they're not 100% foolproof. And they're more to protect against magical corruption than to keep some random dude from wandering into the forest while on a nature hike." 

Adam sighed. He didn't sound happy with the idea of Ronan going by himself, but he didn't sound like he was going to try and stop him either. He looked down at the empty take out box in his lap, then reached over to brush his fingers against Ronan's arm. " _Please_ be careful." 

"I'll bring Opal and Chainsaw with me," Ronan said.  

In the backseat Opal nodded emphatically. "Yes. I'll fight anything. I'll punch it." She made two small fists and a very determined face.  

At that, Adam rolled his eyes, then let out a quiet laugh. "Right." 

*** 

With the BMW in Adam's possession, Ronan was left with the Hondoyota to take himself, Opal, and Chainsaw to Cabeswater 2.0 the following morning. This, he thought, was actually a more nerve wracking prospect than thinking about whatever might be waiting for them in the dream forest. Despite Adam's assurances that the battered old Frankenstein's monster of a car would be fine over short distances, Ronan still didn't quite trust it. 

Still, after Adam had gone off to work and breakfast had been finished and morning chores checked off the list, Ronan convinced Opal to put on her shoes and Chainsaw to abandon the pile of things she was sorting through in the corner so they could all go pile into the car. Opal tried, sneakily, to get into the passenger seat but Ronan glared at her until she crawled into the back.  

Ronan said nothing the whole way to the forest, choosing instead to drown out his thoughts in bass-heavy music that Opal, thankfully, didn't seem to mind. 

When they arrived at the woods it looked, from the outside, exactly as it always did; slightly shimmery, but otherwise an unremarkable stretch of thick growth. Chainsaw settled on Ronan's shoulder, unusually quiet, and Opal clutched at his hand as they stood at the tree line.  

Ronan held his breath, wondering if Opal's tight hold on his hand was a warning. Then all at once the little girl let out a laugh and released his hand before plunging forward into the woods. Ronan sighed and followed her. 

For all appearances, the forest had regained whatever energy it had lost. The sunlight filtering through the trees was bright and clear once more, birds could be heard singing, a faint breeze stirred the leaves above their heads and when Ronan peered into the shadows of the first rocky crag they came upon, he caught a glimpse of one of the guardian creatures. He breathed a sigh of relief. 

Upon reaching the clearing however he saw that Adam's tree was very, very much still there. In fact the clearing could no longer actually be described as a _clearing_ ; the tree, hundreds and hundreds of feet tall and so wide that Ronan doubted even the five of them holding each other's hands could wrap all the way around it. 

He was reminded of an animated movie he'd walked in on Matthew watching with their mother some years ago, something anime thing involving two children meeting a giant mouse-bear-creature that lived in the woods behind their house. 

"Wow," Opal breathed, trying to look up at the thick canopy the tree's branches created. 

Ronan grunted. "Wow is right," he said, walking up to it. When he reached out to touch the tree, the bark felt warm under his hand like it had been sitting in the sun all day. The thought that the tree was comforting crossed Ronan's mind, though he had no idea where that idea had come from.  

Opal grabbed his arm and tugged on it, then proceeded to chatter out something in that strange language of hers. The only word Ronan caught was ' _tir e e'lintes._ ' 

"I have no idea what you just said, were you talking about whatever those things Blue's dad is?" Ronan asked. 

"She could talk to it," Opal said, pointing at the tree. 

That was a fair point, and probably a better plan than any Ronan would have come up with. (Most of his involved climbing the tree but the lowest branches were at least twenty feet above his head.) He nodded, patting Opal on the head, then whistling to Chainsaw who was sitting on a rock some feet away. The bird seemed reluctant to come closer to the gargantuan tree, however, and spread her wings a little, letting out a disgruntled _caw_.  

"You big baby," Ronan told her as he turned around and walked over to the rock. Only once he was far from the trunk of the tree did Chainsaw leave her perch, though she chose to land on Opal's arm instead. Ronan made a face at both of them. "Don't get too far ahead!" he called, when Opal took off skipping back the way they had come. 

Ronan followed at a slower pace, not worried as long as he could still hear Opal, even when she turned around a bend ahead of him. Everything around him felt vibrant and alive, so awake. Even as a faint haze drifted through the sunbeams, Ronan felt like everything had returned to the way it was supposed to be, the way he had intended it as he was dreaming up this new version of Cabeswater. 

Then he realized it had gotten too quiet. Opal's steady chatter and laughter had stopped, and as he slowed and listened, Ronan couldn't hear birds singing anymore either. Then his vision jolted, like someone had hit him suddenly across the back of the head. Ronan came to an abrupt stop. "Opal?!" he called, craning his neck and looking towards the bend in the road that Opal had disappeared around. Something looked...wrong. 

A figure came around the bend, but it was not Opal. It was a man, tall and dressed a little too nicely to just be walking in the woods. He spotted Ronan immediately and froze some dozen yards away snapping a startled sounding, "Who the fuck are you?" 

Ronan stared. He knew that voice. He hadn't heard that voice outside of dreams once in the past few years but he would always, always know it. Lips parting in shock it was a few seconds before Ronan managed to stutter out, "...Dad?" 

Niall Lynch jerked his head back, clearly as startled as Ronan was. He took another step forward, and another, but it wasn't until he had closed all but three feet of space between him that he said hoarsely, "...Ronan?"  

It sounded like he meant to say 'Impossible.' 

He looked just like Ronan had remembered him. Just like he had the year he died but here he was alive and vibrant and, yes, impossible. Ronan must have thought of him. His mind must have dredged a copy of Niall Lynch up from somewhere. Except...when Ronan tore his eyes from his father and looked to the trees he realized suddenly why the forest seemed wrong. Parts of it now looked like a double exposure photograph, or a crosshatch of two forests; here a cedar and a birch tree blended together, there a bush and a stone. 

Time worked strangely on the ley line, and deep down Ronan knew that's what was happening.  

"Yeah," Ronan said, finding his voice again. "Yeah it's _me_ , Dad, it's—" It's me but I'm nineteen years old and you've been dead for years. 

" _Jaysus_ ," Niall breathed. He rubbed his jaw with one hand, blue eyes wide. He shook his head. "Christ." Then he laughed. "Sure but I just saw ya not two hours ago—it's this place. You're not _my_ Ronan. You're from some other _when_." 

Ronan inhaled sharply through his nose. "I'm nineteen." 

"Ah." Niall started to reach out to him, then hesitated. "What's happened to you then? You look..."  

"I don't know if I should tell you," Ronan said. He wanted to run to his father, to be pulled into one of Niall's fierce embraces once again but he didn't.  

Niall closed his eyes. He knew. "Then it's better you don't say." He stood there for a minute, then he opened his eyes and gave Ronan one of his wide, perfect smiles. 

And only then did Ronan close the space between them to wrap his arms around his father, pressing his face to Niall's shoulder. For just a second, he let himself slip. Here was his father alive again, smelling of cotton and open fields and something else Ronan couldn't name but made him think of dreaming. Here was his father, hugging him the same way he always did when he would come back from a long trip and Ronan would be waiting up at the bottom of the stairs to see him. 

"Come now," Niall said, when Ronan tried to breathe but it came out as a shuddering pre-sob sort of sound. "You're too old for that, Ronan." He stepped back, though he kept his hands on Ronan's shoulders and looked him over. "I can't believe you shaved your fucking head." 

For some reason, Ronan felt laughter rising in his chest at that, though he grinned sheepishly and tugged at the collar of his tank top so Niall could see more of the tattoo on his back. "Look, it's even worse." 

"Ya damn hooligan," Niall said, sighing heavily, though a second later he let out another short laugh. "Suppose next you'll tell me Declan's joined a rock band and Matthew dyed his hair blue." 

The very idea of that made Ronan snort. "No. God. Matthew's still a little fucking angel and Declan's still a fucking asshole." 

Niall arched an eyebrow at him. 

"He _is_ ," Ronan protested. "He's always wearing a goddamn suit and him and his girlfriend own a townhouse in D.C. now..." His voice trailed off and he bit his lip and said, "But they're good. Matt and Declan. They're doing good." 

"Nineteen. _Nineteen._ " Niall rolled the word around as he looked Ronan over again. "So you finished at Aglionby then?" 

Ronan stuck his hands in his pockets. "Gansey dragged me kicking and screaming but I finished." 

"Ah, you're still friends with him,” Niall said, nodding a little. He cracked a small grin. "Did he find his king yet?" 

Ronan smiled. 

*** 

They talked for hours. Or at least it felt like hours to Ronan. Partway through a heavily censored recount of the search for Glendower, they sat down on a fallen log. Ronan told Niall as much as he could about the search without giving away anything too important, and Niall listened with a  rapt and fascinated expression. 

And when Ronan finished, they sat in silence for a moment, Ronan staring at his father's hands and Niall staring up at the strange trees. When Ronan looked at his father again, one of the questions he'd always meant to ask floated to the surface of his mind. "Why did you _make_ Mom?" 

Niall was quiet for a long time before he murmured, " _But I, being poor, have only my dreams; I have spread my dreams under your feet._ " 

"That's not a fucking answer." 

"Don't fucking swear at your father," Niall said with a distinct note of humor. "But that _is_ an answer. That's _my_ answer. Besides, you think it would be easy for a regular flesh born person to handle loving a man like me?" 

Ronan stared at him. "You...you made her because you thought you were too much for a normal person to handle?" 

"Well, that's not quite it, no. There was less intent involved.”  Niall waved one hand. "No your mother appeared in my dream and then I fell in love with her. But the idea remains the same." 

"Declan has a pretty normal girlfriend. They seem...fine." 

Niall snorted. "Declan is not like me. Or you, for that matter." 

Ronan continued to frown at him then said, quietly, “ _I_ have a boyfriend. He’s the best goddamn thing that's happened to me.” When his father said nothing Ronan elaborated, “He was one of the group I told you about. Adam Parrish.” 

“The magician,” Niall murmured. Then very slowly he said, “Adam…Parrish…” He said it the way someone would say ‘wind’ or ‘trees’ or ‘soft grass’ when describing the sort of summer day that lay beyond the border of the forest. He leaned forward and took Ronan's jaw in one of his hands. “You're in love with this boy.” 

It wasn't a question, but Ronan nodded anyway. 

"Good. That is good," Niall let his hand fall. There was an odd look on his face, an uncertainty that Ronan had never seen before. Then he cocked his head, as though listening to something that Ronan couldn't hear. He sighed. “Ronan, I have to go.” 

“But…” 

“No, we can't stay here forever,” Niall said, getting to his feet. “Dreams are all well and good but even we must return to our lives eventually. But look at me a moment.” He waited until Ronan was on his feet as well and facing him. Niall put his hand on Ronan's chest. "You know you and your brothers are the world to me, ay?" 

"I know," Ronan said. 

That strange, raw uncertainty had returned to Niall's face then. "All I want..." he began, paused, then said quieter, "Don't fuck up like I did, you hear? Don't waste what you've been given." 

That startled Ronan beyond anything, beyond even the fact that he was standing here talking to his dead father. Niall Lynch was, if anything, unapologetic about all he did. Unapologetic, and never admitting to failure. 

"You didn’t fuck up," Ronan said, desperately. The thought of parting with Niall like this was unbearable. "Dad..." 

Niall smiled, then pulled Ronan close and murmured his name, but it really sounded like he meant to say _I love you_ _so much_.  Ronan closed his eyes. He felt his father's lips touch his forehead.  

When he opened his eyes again, the forest was once more only one forest, and Niall Lynch was gone. 

*** 

Ronan found Opal and Chainsaw waiting for him outside the forest's edge. Though Ronan had thought hours had passed, it was still only late morning. He was certain Opal knew something had happened but the little girl did not say anything if she did; she simply took Ronan's hand and offered him one of the flowers she had picked.  

Ronan took the flower and looked down at it for a minute. It was a perfect, tiny blue lily. His eyes stung.  

"C'mon," he said hoarsely. "Let's go home." 

 


	8. Chapter 8

Ronan had a memory from when he was eight or nine of running down the stairs to greet his father when Niall returned late one night from a trip. Niall had been standing down in the front hall, visible from the top of the stairs and in his excitement to reach his father Ronan had missed a step going down. He remembered with acute clarity that gut dropping feeling of finding open air when his foot had expected a step. 

Finding his father's ruined body had felt a lot like that. Except in the memory of tripping on the stairs, Ronan had grabbed the handrail at the last minute, wrenching his shoulder a little but arresting his fall.  

The day his father died, the fall did not stop.  

_That_ memory had also seared itself in aching detail across Ronan's mind, no matter how many times he tried to erase it. He still remembered the little flare of elation when he peered through the living room curtains to see the BMW in the drive, and how he had smiled as he ran outside. 

The missed step was when Ronan didn't see his father in the driver's seat, or bent over the trunk, or coming around from the other side. It had not crossed his mind yet that something was wrong. The fall was when he circled around the car and saw his father sprawled out on the ground.Everyone always said that dead bodies often looked like the person was just sleeping. Niall Lynch had not looked asleep; he had looked very, very dead.  

Something had broken inside Ronan as he stood there staring, trying to find his voice to scream for his mother, for Declan, for someone to catch him before he hit the ground.  

No one had. When Declan did finally come running he found his younger brother kneeling in the driveway, their father's blood soaking through the knees of his otherwise neat Aglionby uniform trousers. 

*** 

When Adam got back to the Barns that afternoon he could hear music thumping out behind the house. Circling around he found Ronan attacking the tired shed beside the vegetable garden with a paint scraper, kept company by a white-splattered boom box and several beer bottles, all but one of which were empty. Looking past Ronan to the fields, Adam saw Opal prancing around collecting wildflowers. 

"Honey, I'm home!" Adam called jovially.  

Ronan looked over at him, tugging the dust mask down off his face. 

Any humor Adam had felt died immediately. He walked over to Ronan. "Jesus, Ro, what's wrong?" 

"It's..." Ronan shrugged. He pulled Adam close to kiss him, but there was a slight listlessness in the gesture.  

"What happened?" Adam asked, wrapping his arms around Ronan to keep him from pulling away. A faint, acrid odor of paint stripper and beer hung in the air. When Ronan didn't immediately respond, Adam kneaded his knuckles against his spine lightly. "Hey?" 

Ronan's expression strained. He sniffed harshly, then looked down and said, "I saw my _dad_." 

"What?" Adam stared at him. 

"My dad. I was...when I went to check on the forest. He was there. I think it was the fucking ley line or something, it crossed back on itself and we somehow ended up there at the exact same time." Ronan closed his eyes and let out a hissing breath, then looked at Adam again. "We...talked, though." 

Adam hugged him closer. "Jesus, Ronan." 

"Whatever," Ronan said, but it was clearly not just 'whatever.' He half closed his eyes. "I told him about you. I told him you were the best thing that ever happened to me." Then he let out a sad little breath of laughter. "You know, I really do think he would've liked you." 

Something unfurled in Adam's chest, some strange feeling he couldn't name. It was both aching and wonderful at the same time, and he realized that it was a longing for a life that never was or never could be. A life where he would tell people that it was ok that his parents hated him because his boyfriend's mom and dad loved him. A thousand and one imaginary scenarios flooded his mind; joining the Lynch family for dinner, Ronan telling him 'Dad said you should just come stay with us,' Niall teaching him how to do things around the farm...Was it possible to miss someone you'd never met? 

Then Adam realized he was being selfish and gave himself a shake. "Oh, Ronan," he said. "God, I'm sorry." 

"Don't be," Ronan said. He lifted a hand and rubbed his eyes, then nudged Adam off of him so he could put the dust mask and the paint scraper in the shed and shut off the music he'd been playing. He took a deep breath and let it out with a shrug. "I got to hug him again. I got to—" He stopped abruptly, a strange, thoughtful look coming over his face. 

"Ronan?" Adam said, tilting his head. 

"Jesus," Ronan whispered. "It's how he knew." 

Adam still wasn't following. "How he knew what?" 

"How he knew your name!" Ronan said. "How he knew that you were the magician—he knew because I told him! Shit, I should've realized..." 

"So you were in the forest and ran into your dad because of a letter that your dad wrote because you ran into him in the forest—" 

"—where I was because of the letter that he wrote, yeah," Ronan let out another disbelieving sound. "I know, it's some crazy time paradox shit." 

Adam rubbed his cheek and shook his head. Then he laughed. "Gansey's gonna love that." 

"God," Ronan groaned, before he smiled a little softer and pulled Adam close, kissing his temple. "Let's go inside so I can wash up." 

*** 

Adam should have known that Ronan—master of dwelling on difficult feelings—wouldn't have recovered from his encounter that easily. While Adam made dinner, Ronan went to take a shower, but by the time Adam finished cooking, Ronan still hadn't come back downstairs. Leaving Opal with a strict warning not to touch anything, Adam headed up to see where Ronan was. 

"Ro?" he called as he jogged up the stairs. The bathroom and their bedroom were both dark, but looking down the hall Adam could see the door to the master bedroom was open and the light on inside. He walked down to stand in the doorway. "Ronan?" 

Ronan was sitting on the end of his parents' bed, clean and dressed, his brow furrowed. "I thought we should probably move in here," he said. "But like...all _their_ shit is still here. I can't just get rid of it. But I've just been ignoring it for the past two years because like a fucking idiot I keep pretending like they're going to come back." 

"Ronan..." Adam wasn't sure what to do. It was a strange thing, having Ronan starting to feel comfortable enough to open up to him. On one hand it was what he'd wanted since they started dating and he realized that having a boyfriend who didn't like to talk about what went on in his head was worse than it sounded, but on the other, it meant that Adam still had to figure out what to _do_ with Ronan's feelings now that he had them. Biting his lip, Adam crossed over to stand in front of Ronan. He held out his hand. "Why don't you come downstairs and eat and then we can talk about it?" 

"Don't patronize me, Parrish," Ronan said. "I'm not having a breakdown." 

"Really?" Adam said. "Because your eyes are all red and I can tell you have one of your dad's ties bunched up in your hands there." 

Ronan glared at him. 

"If you're about to cuss at me, don't you dare," Adam said lowly. "I just made you dinner and I'm trying to help." 

Ronan closed his eyes. When he opened them again he nodded, then looked at Adam's outstretched hand. Adam had meant for Ronan to take it, but instead Ronan handed him the tie he had been clutching. It was beautiful, silky and grey with a faint, elegant embroidered pattern. It probably cost more than anything Adam owned (assuming it wasn't also a dream object as so many things in the house were). He ran his thumb over it, thinking how it matched his mental image of Niall Lynch perfectly, wondering what it would be like to own things this nice without thinking. 

"You can have it, if you want," Ronan said, pushing himself up off the bed.  

"Oh, Ronan, I can't—"  

Ronan waved his hand. "Seriously, you can have it. He's got a bunch and I don't fucking wear ties." 

"Oh." Adam wrapped the tie around his fingers for a moment. "Declan does though." 

"Declan has his own. Just take it, Parrish, it'll look nice with that suit you have." 

Adam leaned over to kiss Ronan's cheek. "Thank you. It's really nice." 

Ronan grunted and put his hand on Adam's back. "Come on, let's go eat before Opal devours it all." 

*** 

Adam had been right; Gansey did very much enjoy mulling over the strange paradoxical loop that Ronan and Niall had inadvertently created with the letter and the meeting in the forest. Of course this was tempered with his surprise at the fact that the meeting had taken place at all, and for once he seemed to be having difficulties taking Ronan's clear and obvious feelings into account. 

“I just, I can't believe it,” Gansey said for about the tenth time as the group sat around their usual table at Nino’s the following day. “I mean I suppose it makes about as much sense as anything else that's happened but still…you got to see your dad!” 

Ronan was simmering across from him, slouched in his seat. Behind his pursed lips he was running his tongue over his teeth. 

“Gansey I think maybe we should talk about if we want to go try something with the forest this afternoon,” Adam said. Though his tone was a bit stiff it was the politest way he could say ‘let's maybe stop talking about Ronan's dead father.’ 

Gansey blinked at him. “Hmm? Oh! Yes. We probably should. I would say let's do it.” 

“Do what, exactly, though?” This was Blue, seated on Ronan's other side. “Ronan said there was a gigantic tree but what are we supposed to do with that?” 

“Opal seemed to think you should try talking to it,” Ronan said. His hand had found Adam’s leg under the table and he gave it a grateful squeeze.  

Blue arched an eyebrow. “ _Talking_ to it?” 

“Yeah, seeing how you're like a fucking wood nymph or something.” 

"If I'm a wood nymph I'm not sure what that makes you," Blue said, refusing to rise to any baiting. "Now I'll be happy to see what I can do if you can be civil." 

Ronan grinned at her. "Sorry, am I forgetting my magical being privilege by imposing an identity on you?" 

"Ha. Ha." said Blue, but it was obvious that she was trying not to laugh. After a second or two of that she waved her hand and said, "Ok. Yes. Let's go there after we eat and see what we can do." 

"Maybe we'll even—" Gansey began, but stopped himself. 

Ronan looked up and met Gansey's gaze. He knew what he was about to say, and secretly he wondered the same thing, but he couldn't let himself hope. That would be too painful. 

*** 

The forest was, expectedly, just as they had left it. The entire group was still respectfully quiet as they made their way back to where the clearing had once been, and Adam’s tree was now. That might have been for Ronan’s benefit and if it was he resented every minute of it. He showed the resentment through a sullen silence that fooled no one. 

When they reached the tree there was a few minutes of Blue and Adam and Henry and Gansey _oooh_ ing and _ahhh_ ing over the sheer size of it before Ronan loudly cleared his throat. 

“Okay,” Blue said, craning her head back to look up at the branches high above their head. “So…” 

Ronan curled his lip a little. “You definitely can’t climb it, Maggot.” 

“Shush,” said Blue, flapping a hand at him. “I'm trying to think.” She laced her fingers behind her head for a minute, then let her hands fall to her sides. Cautiously she approached the tree, tilting her head from side to side like she was trying to see around the massive trunk.  

After a bit she stepped close enough to touch the tree. The bark was all grooves and ridges, and Ronan remembered from last time that a close examination would reveal faint evidence of where all the stalks had fused together to form the massive trunk. Blue was running her hand up and down as far as she could reach, using the same sort of reverent touch one might use when feeling the musculature of a prize winning racehorse. Her face was a picture of oddly rapt attention.  

The rest of the group held their breath. 

Blue’s hands stopped wandering and rested over a deep, long groove in the trunk. Pursing her lips a little she braced her feet, heavy black boots making it a more impressive gesture, and started to press her thumbs into the groove almost like she was splitting orange sections. She whispered something that might have been “Please.” 

And to everyone's surprise, the tree began to split. The two halves of the trunk arched smoothly away from Blue’s hands, creaking and groaning a bit as they parted, remaining joined up above everyone's heads. When they parted far enough Blue slid her palms flat against the inside, continuing to gently push as she stepped into the still widening arch that they formed. Everyone could see the split continuing into the tree’s trunk, but it had not broken through the other side yet. 

“Jane…” Gansey said, worriedly, but that was all he said. 

There was a funny sort of pop, and then light spilled through the split from the other side. Blue let her hands fall. The arch stopped growing; it was now seven feet high and wide enough for two people to walk abreast. The light coming in from the other side was silver-blue, not the soft gold of the afternoon on their side. 

Ronan was the first to speak. “Wow, did Sargent just fucking split a tree with her bare hands...?” 

Blue turned to look at him, her expression was surprised, but she flexed her biceps and winked before turning to look at the strange archway. 

“Tally ho?” Henry said. 

“Tally ho,” Gansey agreed, then because it didn't look like anyone else was going to, he started forward, leading the way through the arch. After a split second Blue and Henry followed, with Ronan and Adam bringing up the rear. 

The blue light on the other side was that of twilight in late August—surreal, heavy, frighteningly magical. And yet when Ronan craned his head back and looked up through the silvery foliage above them, he could see the sun high in the sky, the same place it had been on the other side of the tree. He looked down again. A path wound away from them, paved with mossy stones. It looked exactly like the cover of a book of Irish fairytales that Ronan remembered from his childhood, right down to the little white flowers that dotted the undergrowth on either side.  

"A dream within a dream," Henry observed, looking around. He met Ronan's gaze and wiggled his eyebrows. "Guess we have to go deeper then, hm?" 

Ronan scoffed. "Really? _Inception_?" 

"You do have some things in common with Cillian Murphy," Henry said, grinning. "Irish. Startling blue eyes. Cheekbones." 

Gansey glanced at them and said absently, "Ronan looks about as much like Cillian Murphy as you look like Leonardo DiCaprio, which is to say not at all." 

"It's true," Henry sighed. "I'm much cuter." 

"Are we going or are you two just going to stay here and flirt the whole time?" Ronan asked.  

"Actually I was admiring your father's handywork," Gansey said. He bowed then and gestured at the path. "Adam? Your show." 

Adam glanced around, his gaze finally settling on Ronan. To say he looked nervous would have been an understatement. Ronan gave him an encouraging little nod, stepping forward to follow right behind him.  

The internal dream forest wasn't completely silent, but it was so quiet that whenever a bird did suddenly sing out, at least half the group jumped. If Cabeswater had felt surreal, this forest felt artificial, but in an uncanny valley kind of way. 

They had not been walking far when they turned a bend and Adam came to an abrupt stop: something very large and very furry lay blocking the path ahead of them. On either side rose up sheer rock faces. The thing itself appeared to be a sleeping animal of some sort, its back to them, limbs all curled up. The thing was huge enough that not even Ronan could see over the top of the massive lump it created.  

"Is that a bear?" Gansey asked uncertainly.  

They stood staring at the thing. Its side was moving with gentle breaths as it slept.  

"If it was a creature Ronan's dad made....maybe it's like the cows?" Adam said, though he eyed the lump warily.  

Behind him, Blue shook her head. "Then what about the birds we've heard and seen since we got to this side? I think it's like Cabeswater, things inside this place can stay awake.” 

"I think you should poke it with a stick," Ronan said.  

Adam glared at him. Then he looked back at the animal. Very cautiously, he stepped forward, edging closer to it and finally pressing one palm flat against the coarse brown fur. Nothing happened. Adam cleared his throat and said, "Uh, hello?" 

Ronan started laughing. The laughter died a second later, however, when the whole massive creature stirred, letting out a disgruntled growling sound. Adam immediately leaped backwards to the others, and they all shuffled away from the furry mass as it continued to move, rolling over and pushing itself up. 

It turned out that it _was_ a bear, huge and shaggy with paws the size of Adam's head. Black beady eyes blinked tiredly at them as the thing sat down, looking oddly human. It yawned, showing a mouth full of massive teeth.  

"Hello."  

It sounded just like one would expect a bear to sound if a bear could talk. 

Blue gave Ronan's arm a light pinch and whispered, "Your dad made a talking bear? Seriously?" 

"I wish I could say I was surprised," Ronan whispered back.  

At the front of the group, Adam watched the bear for a second longer then when it seemed to just be content to sit there he asked, "Um...can we go past?" 

The bear used one paw to scratch behind its ear before it said slowly, "This thing all things devours: birds, beasts, trees, flowers; gnaws iron, bites steel, grinds hard stone to meal; slays kings, ruins towns, and beats high mountains down." 

"What?" said Adam, blinking. 

The bear sighed heavily and started to say again, "This thing all things devo—" 

"No no I heard you I just..." Adam turned to look at the others. He raised an eyebrow. "...Cheng?" 

"Oh I _know_ this!" Henry said, lowering the hand he had been waving in the air. "It's ' _time_ _._ ' That's a riddle and the answer is ‘time.’” 

"Nerd." Ronan whispered. 

Henry waved his hand. "No no, it's just from _The Hobbit._ You know, when Gollum and Bilbo are—" 

" _Nerd_ ," Ronan said louder. Then he shrugged and added, "He's right though." 

Adam shook his head at both of them, then turned back to the bear and said, "The answer is 'time.'" 

"Correct." said the bear, before it went back to preening its fur. 

The group waited expectantly. The bear continued preening. Adam cleared his throat. "Um...we answered the riddle, can we go past?" 

"I never said that you could pass if you answered it," rumbled the bear. 

Several members of the group groaned loudly. If the bear registered that sound, it didn't care. Cursing softly under his breath, Ronan tried simply  squeezing between the bear and the rock wall. The creature let out another sigh and threw one massive paw out, nudging Ronan back down the path with a shake of its big head.  

Gansey rubbed his chin. "I had almost forgotten," he said to Ronan, "that your dad could be as much of an asshole as you are sometimes." 

"I think making the world's most fucking useless bear takes him a step beyond being an asshole," Ronan said.  

Blue tried then, stepping up next to Adam. "Excuse me," she said to the bear. "Will you move if we like...bring you some salmon or something?" 

"No," the bear said. It was now scratching its rear end. 

"I got nothing," Blue said, shrugging and returning to her spot between Henry and Gansey.  

Adam remained standing in front of the bear. Just as the others were starting to get restless he turned and said suddenly, "Gansey, do that thing you do." 

"What thing?" Gansey asked, raising his eyebrows. 

"The kingly commanding thing," Adam said. "I know that's probably not what Ronan's dad _meant_ for us to do to get past this, but it might save us time if it works." 

"I'll give you five bucks if you say 'move bitch, get out the way,'" Henry offered, grinning. 

Gansey gave him a look. "I am _not_ doing that. But I'll try Adam's suggestion." Flexing his hands a little, he stepped forward to take Adam's place in front of the bear. The bear looked at him. He held one fist briefly to his mouth as he cleared his throat then said with all the force and compulsion he could muster, " _Move_. Out. Of. Our. Way." 

For a second it looked like the bear wasn't about to do anything, then it slowly leaned forward and got up so it was standing on all fours. Shouldering past Gansey and Adam and Ronan, it walked over to sit off to one side of the path, leaning back against the rocks. Its eyes started drooping shut. 

"Good job," Ronan said, giving Gansey a slap on the back. "That was easy." 

"Is anyone else wondering what we were _supposed_ to do there?" Gansey asked. 

"No," said Ronan and Blue in unison. 

They continued on. 

*** 

The path ended, finally, when they came to a thirty or forty foot high wall made of some impossibly smooth sandstone like material. It extended off to either side, and the only way through it was the thick iron door that the path led them to. While Henry and Gansey went out in either direction to see if they could walk the perimeter of the wall, Adam, Blue and Ronan stayed to examine the door, or pair of doors as it turned out to be, though the seam between them was so neat and narrow that it was only visible up close.  

The even more remarkable thing about the doors, however, was the huge circular medallion holding them together. Blue guessed that it was a lock, and on closer examination they found that what they thought was a decorative pattern was in fact gears and levers and little bits of metal constructed with the fine mechanical precision of a watch. The center of the lock was another circle, this one containing a seemingly random pattern of oddly shaped holes. 

"It's gonna take one hell of a key to open that," Adam said, watching as Ronan probed the thing with his fingers.  

The three of them looked up a minute or two later as Gansey and Henry returned, each coming from the opposite direction of the one they had left in. When the two boys saw each other they stopped, both looking equally confused.  

"You went all the way around, didn't you?" Henry asked. When Gansey nodded, Henry looked to the others, shaking his head. "We definitely didn't pass each other. The whole back side of this...wall thing is a two foot wide ledge over a cliff, we couldn't have passed each other without noticing." 

"Here I am, not being surprised by anything anymore," Ronan said. 

Gansey scratched the back of his head. "Strange physics aside, I'd say the area this wall encompasses is about the size of a small city block. But there's no way through, and no way over short of bringing a forty-foot ladder with us next time. How's the door looking?" 

"Just like you'd expect a dream door to look," Adam said. "So, strange and impossible." 

Ronan, who had gone back to examining the strange lock, looked over his shoulder. "I can get it open." 

Adam cracked a half smile. "I don't think kicking it is gonna work, Ro." 

"Whatever, Parrish, that was one fucking time," Ronan said, rolling his eyes. "No, what I meant was this is a dream lock so obviously it needs a dream key. Which means, I've got some work to do tonight..." 

*** 

In the fading evening light, Adam sat in the hammock that Ronan had put up on the back porch, slung between the side of the house and one of the porch columns. From the hammock Adam could see out across the fields, which were lit with a damp, blue light that reminded him of the path through the dream forest. Ronan lay with him, between Adam's legs, his back against Adam's stomach and head on his chest. Ronan was asleep, and dreaming. 

Adam looked down at him and couldn't help but smile a little. There were only two ways that Ronan let his face slip into a completely natural expression; when he was sleeping and when he was absolutely certain no one was looking. It wasn't until Adam had started spending more time at the Barns than away that he realized just how much Ronan scowled when other people were around. Even when he wasn't angry there was usually a hard set to his brow and the corners of his mouth, except for now.  

Adam wondered if this was what Ronan Lynch had looked like all the time before his life went to shit. Absently, Adam brushed his fingertips over Ronan's head, feeling the stubble of his hair starting to come in. He'd casually brought up the idea of Ronan growing his hair out a few times, but Ronan would usually just shrug and make some joke about saving money on shampoo. 

Ronan's breathing changed. Adam felt it, then he looked down and could see that there was something under Ronan's hands which had been resting folded on his stomach. Shifting a little in the hammock Adam brought his hand up to rub Ronan's cheek reassuringly until Ronan finally regained control of his muscles.  

"Bingo," Ronan whispered. He held up the thing he had brought back: it was round, the size of his palm, and had a number of metal pieces protruding from one side. Ronan turned the object over in his hands, and from the angle  he was sitting Adam could just make out the bemused frown on his boyfriend's face. "What the fuck kind of European-electrical-plug-looking shit is this?" Ronan said. 

"Ronan." Adam had to stifle a fit of giggles in Ronan's shoulder. "Is that it? Is that the key?" 

"It's _supposed_ to be the key," Ronan said, still turning the strange thing over in his hands. “I'm pretty positive it's the key.” 

Adam wrapped his arms around Ronan's shoulders. "So what, your dad made a lock that he knew only you would be able to make a key for?" 

"Apparently. I mean that's basically what he did with his will and the Barns, remember?" Ronan said. He let one arm hang over the side of the hammock, and a moment later there was a _thunk_ as he let the key fall to the wooden floor of the porch. "What if we get through the door and he's left you like, _An Idiot's Guide to Magic Tricks_?" He craned his head back to look up at Adam with a grin. 

"Is that something your dad would do?" Adam asked, arching an eyebrow. He lightly rubbed his fingers over Ronan's forehead.  

Ronan shrugged. "Dunno, I never had a boyfriend before to find out. But I didn't just learn how to be a jackass all on my own, you know. I wouldn't put it past him." 

"Well, if that is the case," Adam said, wrapping his arms around Ronan's shoulder's once again and hugging him tightly. "Guess I'll start spending my Friday nights doing card tricks in Harvard Square." 

Ronan laughed, then he abruptly turned over and stood up so suddenly that the hammock tipped and Ronan had to grab it so Adam wouldn't fall out. Leaning over, Ronan took the opportunity to steal a long, slow kiss. “C’mon,” he murmured against Adam’s lips a second later. “Let's go to bed.” 

“Didn't you just basically take a twenty minute nap?” Adam asked, frowning a little. 

“I'm not suggesting we _sleep_ , I'm suggesting we go to _bed._ ” Ronan made a face. “Way to kill the mood.” 

“Oh. _Oh._ ” Feeling his cheeks heat up, Adam let Ronan help him out of the hammock and to his feet. “Right, let's go do that.” 

“Nut,” Ronan muttered, grinning as he bent to grab the key before he slung an arm around Adam's shoulders and steered him inside. 


	9. Chapter 9

Adam did not know how he had done it, how any of them had done it, all through their time at Aglionby, jumping between their adventures with the ley line and their relatively normal school lives. He couldn't remember how they'd been able to spend one night searching for Glendower, then wake up the next morning and go to class. The worst had been after Gansey died and came back, of course; but as Gansey had reasoned, they didn't have much choice than to show up at school the following Monday.  

But here Adam was again; a strange adventure in a dream forest, then up early the next morning, showering, dressing, having breakfast, kissing Ronan goodbye, and getting in the car.  

When he arrived at Aglionby and made his way to the student records office he found Calla's desk empty, though her computer was on and the mug next to it still had a few dregs of tea left in the bottom. Figuring she had gone to get food or to chat with one of the mysterious other employees of the main office, Adam settled at his own desk and started pushing papers around to figure out where he had left off the day before.  

As he collected a stack of files and carried them over to the bulky scanner in the corner, Adam's mind wandered back to the previous day. He found himself thinking for the millionth time about Ronan's encounter with Niall. Other than the sheer strangeness of the meeting, Adam couldn't quite put his finger on why he couldn't stop thinking about it.  

Then, as he watched papers feeding through the scanner, it struck him; he was jealous. Jealous that he hadn't been with Ronan for it, jealous that despite all the tragedies surrounding them, Ronan once had a father who loved him.  

Adam pressed the heel of his palms against his eyes for a moment. He couldn't think like that. He certainly didn't have the right to hop on the coattails of his boyfriend's grief. 

Someone knocked on the open door of the office. 

Turning, Adam expected to see one of the other staff members. Instead the person he saw was none other than Declan's mentor, Damien Pearce. Adam was so surprised that all he could do for a moment was stare. 

Pearce gave him an apologetic smile. "Mr. Parrish. Goodness I hope I didn't startle you." 

"No, sir," Adam said. He set the papers he'd been holding down and took a few steps closer to the door. "Sorry, I just wasn't expecting..." He tried to remember if Pearce had mentioned some connection to Aglionby, but he wasn't coming up with any. Giving himself a shake, Adam smiled and said, "Did you need something?" 

"Well, in a way," Pearce said. He stepped into the room and absently removed his glasses, pulling what looked like a handkerchief from his pocket. "I'd heard you were working here so I thought I would stop in and say hello..."  

Something felt _off_ to Adam, just enough to set off little warning bells in the back of his head. Except Pearce hadn't _done_ anything yet so Adam didn't know why he was suddenly praying that Calla would get back from wherever she had gone off to. 

Expression shifting to concern, Pearce took another step towards Adam. "Are you all right?" 

"Yeah uh," Adam frowned a bit. "Sorry, not really awake yet. Why did you say you're in the—" 

Pearce lifted his hand and pressed the cloth over Adam's nose and mouth. Adam tried to pull away, holding his breath as much as he could, but Pearce somehow had his other arm wrapped around Adam's shoulders. Adam's eyes went wide; he was still holding his breath, but even so a faint whiff of chemical sweetness seeped into his nose.  

His vision was starting to go fuzzy and he realized vaguely beyond the panic that he was either going to have to inhale or he would pass out anyway from lack of oxygen. His body made the decision for him, however, and Adam let out an involuntary gasp, sucking part of the cloth into his mouth as he inhaled.  

There was a moment of wooziness, of his whole body becoming sluggish, then Adam sank into a deep, dreamless dark. 

*** 

When Adam woke the ground beneath him was shaking. No. That wasn't it. He was lying on the back seat of a moving car, his wrists and ankles bound, a piece of fabric in his mouth. Someone had used both seatbelts to keep him from rolling onto the floor or, as he discovered, from properly sitting up.  

In the front seat someone cleared their throat, and a moment later Pearce's voice drifted back to him. "Don't fret too much, Mr. Parrish. I know what I'm doing, you won't sustain any lasting damage from that chloroform but you may feel a bit out of it for a while. That's all right, we still have some time before we reach our destination." He let out a little laugh. "You could even take a short nap if you wanted, that might not be a bad idea. We do have a few things to talk about when we get where we're going." 

Adam made as much of a frustrated noise as he could while gagged. Even with the woozy after effects of the drug, in his panic everything sped towards acute clarity. Sleep was the last thing on his mind. 

*** 

They drove for a long time. Over an hour, if Adam could guess, though he couldn't see a clock from where he lay. Pearce said nothing else for the duration of the ride, either, though he would occasionally hum to himself.  

Finally the car slowed and turned, and Adam heard the crunch of gravel under the tires. The car stopped. Pearce got out and opened the back door by Adam's feet, leaning in to first undo the seatbelts, then to untie Adam's legs and haul him to his feet.  

Once outside the car Adam looked around. They were in the driveway of a large house, one that looked to Adam like someone had taken an english cottage and expanded it to the size of a mansion. Though there was a paved road behind them, he saw only thick forest on either side and no sign of any close neighbors.  

"Here we are, home sweet home," Pearce said.  

Adam looked at him. Then Adam looked at the front door of the house and jumped back; sitting on the front step, its eyes fixed on him, was an enormous black dog. 

"You met my faithful friend here already, I think," Pearce murmured. He put one hand on either of Adam's arms then, steering him forcefully towards the front door and the dog. The dog did not make a sound, but it raised its hackles as they drew closer. "I left him at the Barns that day I left the money with your boyfriend." He shifted his hold, one arm wrapped around Adam's shoulders so he could unlock the front door. 

Once inside Adam found himself being steered down a narrow hall towards the back of the house. He caught brief glimpses of lavishly decorated rooms, then finally a sparklingly clean kitchen before Pearce urged him next down a rickety flight of stairs into the unfinished basement. The black dog followed them, silent and huge.  

Pearce steered Adam around the corner at the bottom of the stairs and into the laundry room, where he made sure Adam was securely tied to a wooden chair before finally removing the gag. 

"I know what you're going to ask," he said. "Why the laundry room? It has a drain in the floor." 

What Adam _actually_ asked was, "What the fuck do you want?!"  

"Language, Mr. Parrish," Pearce said. "I'm not your foul-mouthed boyfriend. Now, you're going to have to be quiet for a bit while I explain why you're here, so if you have any other pressing questions you had better ask them now." 

"Who are you?" Adam asked. "Why did you give Declan two thousand dollars? Are you one of his clients?" 

Pearce laughed at that. "You make Declan Lynch sound like a prostitute. Then again he sort of is. No, I gave Declan that money because a friend of his redid my kitchen." 

Adam blinked. "You're lying." 

"I'm not, actually. Didn't you look when we were walking down? It's gorgeous. Imported granite countertops and all." Pearce said. "What I find hilarious is that you all apparently saw nothing strange with the idea of me trusting Ronan Lynch to give that much cash over to his brother and didn't think I had an ulterior motive." 

"We _did_ ," Adam said. "But Declan told us—" He stopped, because Declan had, it seemed, told them the truth for once.  

Pearce made a simpering face at him. "Well. Now that we've got that all out of our system...I am, in fact, one of Niall Lynch's former customers, so you weren't far off there. But here's the thing; he's dead. He's dead, and thanks to this rumor about the Greywaren we know that most of what he sold were dream objects. But that doesn't make them any less desirable and in fact, his creations are experiencing a posthumous rise in value." 

"You...want something that Ronan's dad made?" Adam asked.  

"Not just anything, I want what Niall Lynch made for _you_ ," Pearce said, walking over to stand directly in front of him. "I want this...powerful, magical gift that he crafted you." 

Adam swallowed and looked up at him, his jaw tensed. "I don't know what you're talking about." 

"You're a terrible liar, Mr. Parrish," Pearce said. "I know about the letter, I heard Ronan telling Declan about it. And that day I left the dog and the money with you, I slipped into the house before you all got home and read it for myself. I figured I would let you do the footwork, being the youngsters that you are, however my pair of eyes..." he turned to nod at the dog, which was sitting in the corner, "...leads me to believe that you have just about found it." 

Looking down, Adam tried to will his heart to stop racing. He could see just between his feet the drain in the floor, and wondered if that really was the reason that Pearce had tied him up down here. The drain looked like some strange insect eye, and Adam found himself wishing desperately that he could still call Cabeswater to his aid. He could imagine vines creeping up out of the drain, pulling him from the chair... 

"The key, Mr. Parrish," Pearce said. 

"I don't have it." Adam looked up at him. 

Pearce sighed. "I know _you_ don't have it. But one thing I've learned, it's easier to threaten the Lynch boys into doing something than to fight them. So let's give your boyfriend a call, shall we?" 

"Ronan won't answer his phone." 

"He will if you're the one calling." Pearce straightened then and slid his hand into his pocket, drawing out Adam's cell phone. He waved it and winked, then tapped at the screen before holding it to his ear. While he waited for Ronan to answer, Pearce wandered over and took something off the utility shelf against the wall. The something turned out to be a gun, which Pearce checked over for a second before he smiled. "Actually no," he said into the phone. "It's Damien Pearce. You remember, we met at your brother's—yes, he is here, would you like to say hello?" 

Adam leaned forward in his seat as Pearce held the phone to his ear. "Ronan?!" 

" _Adam!_ " Ronan sounded frantic. " _Are you_ _al_ _l_ _right_ _?"_  

"Yeah I'm fine I'm—"  

Pearce took the phone back before Adam could finish. "He's fine, _for now_ , Lynch. But he won't stay that way. So here's what you're going to—no, you need to listen to me—you're going to come to my house, I'll give you the address momentarily, and you are going to bring that key with you..." he was quiet for a moment. "Because otherwise I will kill Adam Parrish, do you understand?" There was a long pause, but whatever Ronan was saying made Pearce smile then say, "Good boy."  

He hung up the phone then texted something, the address probably, before returning the phone to his pocket and aiming the gun at Adam. "He caved faster than I thought." 

"Course he did," Adam said, frowning. "I mean more to him than anything his dad could've left me." 

"Isn't it nice to have such a devoted significant other?" Pearce said with a fond smile. "My wife would do the same. She _has_ done similar things for me in the past." 

Adam tried to glare at him, but he was worried that the fear he felt was starting to seep through. He gave his wrists an experimental tug, but Pearce clearly knew what he was doing.  

"And now we wait," Pearce said, moving to lean against the washing machine. "It's nearly a two hour drive here from Henrietta, but I expect your boyfriend will push the limits, so who knows..." 

*** 

Ronan made the drive in an hour and a half. Pearce did not say a word to Adam the whole time they waited, leaving Adam to fret and worry in silence. Pearce remained standing in front of the chair the whole time. He had the gun in one hand, but kept it hanging at his side rather than pointing at Adam. It felt like the longest hour and a half of Adam's life. 

Then, somewhere upstairs a door slammed and there were footsteps accompanied by Ronan's voice calling out. Pearce shouted a response of "In the basement!" and a second later Adam recognized the sound of Ronan's boots clomping down the stairs.  

The first thing Ronan did when he reached the basement was attempt to run to Adam, but Pearce threw an arm out to stop him. "Ah. The key first." 

"Fuck you," Ronan said, but he held out a drawstring bag to Pearce. "It's in there." His gaze returned to Adam, and Adam tried to give a little nod to show that he was all right. 

Still holding the gun, Pearce checked inside the bag. "Wonderful. You're so much more cooperative than your father ever was." 

"Don't fucking talk to me about my dad," Ronan hissed.  

"Or not." Pearce set the bag down. Then he raised the gun. "Now, I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to say goodbye to your boyfriend." 

"What?!" Ronan and Adam shouted in unison. Ronan made a movement forward, "What the _fuck,_ I gave you the goddamn key, you said you'd—" 

"What I said, Mr. Lynch," Pearce said, calmly and evenly, "was that if you _didn't_ bring the key, I would hurt Mr. Parrish. I made no promises about what would happen if you did bring the key." 

Adam's whole body had gone cold, and he could feel himself shaking, his eyes fixed on the black barrel of the gun pointed at his face. There was a noise from somewhere upstairs that made him jump a little, but he couldn't find his voice or the will to struggle. All he managed to do was drag his gaze to  Ronan.  

The only other time Adam had seen such raw emotion on his face was when Gansey had died, and then it had been deep, furious grief. Now Ronan wore a look of abject fear. Somehow it made him appear much smaller and younger.  

"You can't do this, man," Ronan said to Pearce. "You can't fucking do this." 

"I have to," Pearce said. "I am, truly, sorry. But you must understand, I can't risk leaving the intended wielder of this item alive. Now say goodbye, I'm being very patient with both of you." 

Ronan looked at Adam and the second their eyes met, Adam realized with a sickening feeling that Ronan had no idea what to do. There was no secret plan, no magic, nothing. Just two frightened boys and a man with a gun. Adam was so consumed by his own dead shock that he did not hear the sound of hurried footsteps on the basement stairs. 

He did, however, hear Declan Lynch's voice shout, " _Pearce!_ Put the gun down. Now." 

They all looked to the doorway. There stood Declan, dressed in a neat suit, his expression cold and a gun in his hand.  

"Well this is interesting," Pearce said, and now there was an edge to his voice. 

"I've already called the police," Declan said. "I mean it: drop the gun." 

Pearce did not. He started to turn  back to face Adam, but there was a deafening _bang_ and Pearce let out a howl of pain, dropping to his knees as he clamped a hand to the side of his now bloody thigh. His gun clattered to the ground, and Declan stepped forward, kicking the other weapon away as he kept his trained on the man before him. 

"I was not fucking around," Declan said lowly. Then he looked at his brother and said, "Ronan, untie Adam and take him upstairs. When the police get here—Ronan, listen to me—when the police get here send them down here. I need to make sure Pearce doesn't bleed out." 

For a heavy second Ronan stared at his older brother, then he shook himself and jumped forward to untie Adam and roughly haul him to his feet. "C'mon, c'mon..." he muttered, pulling Adam towards the stairs.   

When they got upstairs two police officers were already rushing inside. Ronan said something to them that Adam didn't catch—his good ear was still ringing from the gunshot and his head was spinning. He slumped against Ronan, and as the police hurried downstairs the two of them sank to the kitchen floor to wait for Declan. 

*** 

At some point more police arrived, and an ambulance, and there were a lot of questions that the very dazed Adam could barely answer, and a paramedic who said he was in shock though no immediate danger. He and Ronan were moved to a sitting room to wait somewhere more quiet and comfortable than the kitchen floor. 

Adam wondered vaguely if anyone else saw the black dog. If it was even still there. 

And then, finally, Declan came into the room where they were sitting. "Are you guys okay?" 

"I think...so," Adam said slowly.  

Ronan said nothing, but he did stand up and walk over to his brother. For a long moment the two of them looked at each other, then abruptly Ronan pulled Declan into a fierce, tight embrace, his arms around Declan's shoulders.  

Declan looked utterly shocked for a second before brought his arms up, returning the embrace just as fiercely. "You're okay," he muttered.  

"Fuck, man," Ronan said, and his voice shook. " _Fuck_." 

Eventually they drew apart, but Declan kept a hand on Ronan's arm.  

Ronan wiped his hand over his eyes. "How did you know to come here?" 

"I suspected Pearce was up to something the day you brought me that money," Declan said. "He wanted me to know that he had been to the Barns. I'm not entirely sure why but..." He shook his head, running a hand through his hair. "I trusted him. I didn't think..." 

Both Lynch brothers wore complicated expressions. As Declan trailed off they once again fell back to simply staring at each other.  

Adam found his voice again. "Hey, Declan...thanks. For, um, you definitely saved my life." 

"Of course," Declan said, looking his way. Like Ronan, he had a very intense stare. "I'm responsible for you little shits, especially when...Jesus, I didn't think he was actually after Dad's stuff. I shouldn't have asked you to come to that dinner." 

"You didn't know," Adam said, shaking his head. 

Declan shrugged, then turned back to Ronan, who was still staring at him with a look that bordered on wide-eyed wonder. Declan moved his hand from Ronan's arm to the side of his head. "Now do you believe me?" he asked. "I know we have a shitty relationship, Ronan, and that we hurt each other, but I _need_ you to believe that all I've wanted after Dad died was to keep you and Matthew safe. And it's not because I want to control your life, it's because I just need you to be okay." 

Adam looked between the two of them. He knew under any normal circumstances this would be where Ronan shot back with a sharp retort, but this was different.  

"I know this probably won't change much between us," Declan said. "But I just, _really_ need to know that you understand, Ronan. Please."  

"Yeah," Ronan said quietly. "I know." 

Declan nodded. Then he leaned forward to rest his forehead lightly against Ronan's for a moment. Still sitting on the couch, Adam stared at them. It was so deeply unlike either of them to show affection for one another that this single gesture said more than if they had sat down and poured out their feelings.  

"I saw Dad," Ronan whispered.  

Declan drew back from him. "What?" 

"I saw Dad," Ronan said again. "The ley line, it...fucks with time. Something happened and Dad and I ended up in the same place." 

"Jesus, Ronan..." Declan sighed.  

"I'm not making this up!" Frustration bit back into Ronan's voice again, and he struggled to keep in under control. "That letter was real and I really saw him. And you know what, I know you're convinced that the only reason he wanted you around was to protect me but he loved you just as much, man. You were important to him." 

Declan's face hardened, and Adam could tell that whatever moment had passed between them was over. "Ronan," he said, letting his hand fall and moving to straighten his jacket and sleeves. "I know you want to believe that. And I will always look out for you until the day I die, but no. Dad didn't love me the way he loved you." 

Ronan frowned at him, his lips a thin, hard line. 

"Are you okay to drive?" Declan asked. "Will you come stay with me at least for tonight?" 

"Yes and _hell no_ ," Ronan snapped. He started to hold his hand out to Adam, then let it fall, turning to Declan once more, "You know what I don't get? You're only a year older than me, why do you keep acting like you have some deep inside knowledge about Dad that I don’t?" 

"Because I was his colleague, not his son," Declan said coldly. "Ronan, I appreciate what you're trying to do, but that's how things were. I worked with Dad, I was part of his little scheme, I wasn't his favorite child. Do you understand what Greenmantle was trying to do by having Dad killed in our driveway? He wanted _me_ to find the body. He wanted to threaten _me_ into giving him the Greywaren. Dad died because someone wanted something _from me_." 

Ronan stared. "It wasn't your fault," he muttered. 

"I was sixteen," Declan said. "I didn't fucking know that. Now come on, we need to go." 

*** 

Adam was not entirely certain that Ronan _was_ okay to drive all the way back to Henrietta, but neither was he, and he thought staying with Declan was an even worse idea. So he didn't argue as they got into the BMW and sat in Pearce's driveway while the last of the police cars and then Declan's Volvo pulled away.  

"He's not going to get in trouble, is he?" Adam asked finally, because he couldn't think of anything else to say. "Declan, I mean. For shooting Pearce." 

Ronan's hands were resting on the steering wheel but he still hadn't started up the car. "I don't fucking know. Probably not. Declan's licensed to carry a sidearm and he shot him to disarm and out of self-defence. He's also good at sliding out of situations like that." 

"Right." Adam nodded, then reached over and squeezed Ronan's leg. He said quietly, "Declan cares about you." 

"I know." Ronan let out a harsh breath. "I know that. Doesn't mean he isn't an asshole." 

They fell into silence for a moment. Ronan closed his eyes. Outside, cicadas shrilled and somewhere far away a lawn mower started up. Finally Adam shifted in his seat, leaning closer to Ronan. "I should've gotten a picture," he said. 

Ronan opened his eyes and looked at him. "Huh? Of what?" 

"You and Declan hugging." Adam looked at him. "There's no way anyone will believe that happened." 

"You tell anyone about that and you're sleeping on the couch, Parrish," Ronan said, making a face and finally starting the car. 

Adam found himself laughing quietly, some of the tension of the day finally ebbing away. "Whatever, Lynch. Let's go home." 


	10. Chapter 10

It is a funny thing, how stress and shock affect one's mind. Never once during the whole event with Pearce did the words "kidnapped" or "hostage" or "held at gunpoint" cross Adam's mind, not until the next day when a police officer showed up at the Barns to take Adam and Ronan's statements about what had happened. The officer used words like that, and by the time he left, Adam was starting to feel an awful, sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. It was not unlike the one he had felt after being admitted to the hospital the night he left his parents' house.  

Stepping back into the room after seeing the police officer out, Ronan hovered for a minute, looking at Adam with a frown. "You okay?" 

Adam opened his mouth to say something, but he found he didn't have enough breath to speak. Gasping in a lungful he began. "I...I ah..." Another sharp breath. "I don't—" Why was it suddenly so difficult to get oxygen into his lungs? It was like someone had injected them with adrenaline, he _knew_ he was breathing too fast and too hard but he couldn't get himself to stop. And why were his hands shaking so much? He gritted his teeth like he could force the flow of air to cease, but all that happened were tears springing to his eyes. "R-ronan..." he managed to wheeze. 

And then Ronan was kneeling in front of him, hands on Adam's arms. "Hey. Hey, Parrish, look at me," he said and his voice was so much lower and calmer than Adam had ever heard it. "Look at me. Deep breaths, okay? _Slooow_..." Ronan inhaled noisily and slowly, then let it out just as slowly.  

"I can't..." Adam shook his head. He was starting to feel dizzy, and his throat was choking up like he had been crying.  

Ronan took Adam's hands, putting one on his own chest and one on Adam's. "With me, Adam," he murmured, taking another deep, even, careful breath. 

Adam closed his eyes. He felt Ronan's chest rise and fall under his hand. He could feel the beat of Ronan's pulse as well. After a minute of fighting with himself, he thought only about that, and let himself inhale just as slow and careful as Ronan, and then exhale the same. And again, and again. 

"There, you ok now?" Ronan asked, once Adam had managed to do it on his own a few times. 

"Yeah," Adam said weakly. "Jesus Christ. I'm a mess." 

"You're fine," Ronan said. He moved to sit on the couch, sprawling back into the corner of it. 

After a second Adam moved to lie against Ronan's chest, one arm around his waist, head tucked under his chin. "I love you," he whispered. 

"I love you too," Ronan said, wrapping his arms around Adam.  

Adam rubbed his thumb in light circles against Ronan's side. "I don't even know what that was," he mumbled. "I'm sorry." 

"Pretty sure that was the start of a panic attack," Ronan said. "You sure as hell don't have anything to be sorry for. They're hell." 

Somehow knowing that just made Adam feel worse. He sighed, holding Ronan tighter. "Did you ever..." 

"Man, I found my dad's body after he was murdered," Ronan said. "That fucked me up big time. And the shitty thing is I'm only just starting to realize just how much. So yeah, I had fucking panic attacks and flashbacks and all that crap." 

Adam sat up and looked at him. "Did you ever see a therapist about it?" he asked, raising an eyebrow. 

"Yeah," Ronan said. "I had mandated counseling after Dad died, and I had to go see someone after everyone thought I tried to kill myself too. Except I didn't think I needed it either time so there was only so much it did." 

"Okay but like those are both _real_ reasons to—" 

"Bullshit," Ronan said. "There's no such thing as a 'real reason,' Parrish. If your brain's out of whack and fucking you up, then your brain's out of whack and fucking you up. But you have had to deal with way more than anyone should. Don't feel bad about how you're reacting." 

Adam closed his eyes. He lay his head back down on Ronan's chest. "I just wanna sleep forever," he mumbled.  

Beneath him, Ronan shifted so he could stretch out on the couch with Adam on top of him. "You can sleep if you want," Ronan said. "But I'm gonna put the TV on okay? And we should take Opal for a walk later." 

"Okay," Adam said. The TV clicked on quietly, and the soft murmur of voices and music filled the room. Adam turned his head a little so he could see the TV if he opened his eyes, but also so more of his cheek was pressed to Ronan's chest. Warmth seeped through him, but he still felt exhausted and heavy and so for now let himself sink into a premature sleep. 

*** 

To Adam's intense relief, Gansey, Blue and Henry did not make a big deal out of the news when it was relayed to them the next day. They knew Adam had gone missing, obviously, because Calla was the one to find out and immediately tell Ronan. And Adam had no doubts that they had been worried about him, though they had been in the dark about specifics however until they showed up at the Barns the following day with food and sympathetic ears. Maybe Ronan had warned them ahead of time, or maybe they could just tell how much it had shaken Adam, because thankfully there was no fawning or fussing over him. 

"So let me get this straight," Blue said. "Declan _shot_ someone? Is he in trouble now?" 

"Declan isn't, Pearce is," Ronan said. "He's going to prison probably, hopefully. After he gets out of the hospital." 

They were all sitting on the back porch at the Barns, watching insects dance over the fields in the early afternoon sun. Adam was sitting on a step below Ronan, leaning back against his boyfriend. "That's not even the weirdest thing that happened," he said. He still wanted, desperately, not to linger on anything that could potentially lead to pity. "Declan and Ronan hugged each other without being told to." 

Gansey adopted an exaggerated look of shock. " _Ronan Niall Lynch,_ is this _true_?" 

"God." Ronan rolled his eyes. "Fuck off, Dick." 

"You _hugged_ your older brother?" 

"Your middle name is 'Niall'?" That was Henry, looking over from where he and Blue were reclining on the porch swing. 

Ronan let out a loud and deeply put upon sigh.  

Blue giggled. "We're very proud of you, Ronan. But we can talk about something else." 

"We could talk about finishing our quest," Adam suggested. "Ronan dreamed up the key, so we should be able to get through that door finally. We could even go today." 

Henry was the only one who didn't hesitate to respond. "I must admit I _have_ been dying of curiosity to find out what Papa Lynch left for Parrish. Assuming it lives up to all this hype and trouble he's put us through." 

Adam looked around at the others. He could see wariness in their gazes, or rather, in Gansey and Ronan's gazes. Blue looked about as curious as Henry did. "Come on," he said. "I can't be the only one who wants this to be over with." 

"Yeah but...right now?" Gansey said. "Adam, I'm just thinking that you probably should take another day to just kind of...you know, recover from what happened, shouldn't you? You're still looking a bit..." He trailed off because he finally caught the frown Adam had fixed him with.  

"A bit what, Gansey?" Adam said, bitingly. His nostrils flared and he let out a little huff that was far more Ronan-like than Adam realized. Then he continued, "Yeah what happened sucked big time. But I don't want to keep thinking about it. I want to focus on something else. I want to finish this stupid quest and see what we've gone to all this trouble to get. Besides, the longer we wait the more chance there is of something going wrong." 

Ronan had one arm around Adam still, though he had been looking at the fingernails of his other hand with exaggerated disinterest in the brewing argument. Still he added, "I have to agree with Parrish on this one." 

Gansey rounded on him, speaking in an absolutely infuriating tone of forced Richard-Campbell-Gansey-III brand calm. "Ronan, your boyfriend just went through a fairly traumatic experience; you should be trying to encourage him to _rest_." 

"Excuse me?!" Adam said. The conversation had rapidly deteriorated into everything that he had been afraid of. "Ronan isn't my fucking keeper, you can't just go around me and get him to control me like I'm a child! I'd think that after everything we went through you could trust me to know my own goddamn limits." 

For a second it looked like Gansey was about to press the issue, but Blue stretched out one leg as far as it would go and pushed her toes against the small of his back, clearing her throat. Gansey took a deep breath, let it out and held his hands up. "Adam, I'm sorry. You're right. That was out of line and I apologize." 

Ronan's fingers were moving in small circles on Adam's back. Adam took a deep breath and nodded. "Thank you." 

"Well, if you want to go open the door today," Gansey continued, looking over his shoulder to Blue and Henry, "We don't have anything else planned." 

Adam looked to Ronan, who gave a little shrug. Adam nodded. "Yeah. Let's go do it. Let's finish this." 

*** 

Though Niall Lynch's dream forest hadn't changed, the group walking through it moved with almost ceremonial precision and slowness. They walked down the path in single file: first Ronan, expression hard; then Adam, carrying the strange key; then Blue, tilting her head back to look at the trees; then Henry, bright-eyed; and finally Gansey bringing up the rear, his chin high. To him, this was more the way he had imagined their final descent to Glendower _should_ have been, rather than the frantic flight that it actually was. 

This time, nothing stood in their way. In fact when they got to the pass between the rock faces, there was no sign of the giant talking bear. For some reason this worried Adam, but he said nothing, closely following Ronan as they continued on until they reached the wall and the strange door. 

"Here goes nothing," Adam said, stepping forward with the key. He hesitated a moment, trying to line it up correctly. There was a brief second when he thought it wasn't going to fit, and even heard Ronan let out a frustrated sigh, but with a click the key finally slid home. 

From inside the door there came a few strange, mechanical sounds, followed by another loud click. Adam waited. When nothing else happened, he put both hands on the door and pushed it open. 

" _Oh_ ," gasped Blue as the group stepped through.  

And "oh" was right. Adam had expected a closed room on the other side, so when he stepped through into sunlight so bright he had to shield his eyes for a moment, he was surprised. And when his eyes adjusted, he saw plainly why Blue had gasped. They were standing in a field, an acre or so in all, the grass at their feet as soft as silk and so vibrantly green it looked like strands of peacock feathers. Silver-leaved poplars dotted the area, and dust motes floated like flecks of gold leaf through the air. Everything was perfectly, impossibly still. 

"Is this the present?" Henry asked, awestruck. 

"I don't think so," Ronan said, and pointed at something that was walking towards them from the other side of the field.  

Adam stared. The creature approaching them was a stag, but it was unlike any creature Adam had ever seen before: its silken coat was so tawny that it shone like molten gold in the sunlight, the collar of thicker fur around its shoulders shifting and shining with each slow, methodical step of its slender legs. Antlers that looked like vines curled up from its head, the same deep gold color as its hooves. Where it stepped, tiny jewel bright flowers flashed into life, though it was hard to say if they were new or if the creature's hooves merely parted the grass to reveal them. 

Behind Adam, one of the boys gasped, and Blue whispered, "Holy fuck." 

When the stag was close enough, it extended its head towards Adam, nose twitching a little. Adam reached up, holding his hand out to touch first the stag's snout, then slide his palm up to rest against its forehead. The creature peered at him with eyes the color of sunlight falling through amber.  

The stag was not just a dream thing; beneath Adam's palm it pulsed with the life of the ley line. Adam could feel it seeping though his veins and into his very bones, in a way he hadn't felt since...well, ever. Even the day he woke the ley line he hadn't felt so deeply rooted to it as he did now. 

He felt like he could do anything.  

"It's like...it's like an amplifier," Adam breathed. 

Gansey stepped closer, but no one else reached out to touch the stag just yet. "You mean like Blue?" 

"No it's...different than Blue it's like...touching it is like closing a circuit or...or...I don’t know." Adam couldn't describe it, he didn't want to describe it. "I think...I think I might be able to use my powers again, like I could back—" 

He stopped because the stag abruptly lifted its head, ears twitching anxiously. Its nostrils flared and it let out a deep, unsettled snort.  

And then they heard it: from the other side of the cracked door came an eerie, howling bark.  

"The fuck is that..." Ronan breathed, striding back over to the door. He looked out for only a second before letting out a panicked, " _Fuck!_ " and hurling himself against the door, slamming it closed as much as the heavy door could be slammed closed. Gansey jumped forward to help him and the two were still pressed against it when there was a _bang_ as something slammed into the other side. "It's a fucking dog or some shit!" Ronan shouted, looking back over at Adam. "It's a black dog but it's the size of a goddamn tiger." 

Pearce's black dog. Though it sounded like it had about doubled in size since they last saw it. Adam had one hand tangled in the thick fur of the stag's collar, holding it tight though he could feel the creature's desire to turn and bolt. His mind raced though, where would it go? There was only so far it could run inside the enclosure, and the only way out was the door where the dog was. 

The door shook again, though it was holding on its own as Ronan and Gansey had stepped away from it. 

"What the fuck do we do, Adam?" Ronan asked, looking at him. 

Adam bit his lip. "Open the door." 

" _What_?!" Henry exclaimed. 

"It's got us trapped in here," Adam said. "And I doubt it's going anywhere soon. If we open the door we at least have a chance of us and or the stag getting out past it. I'm sure it's here for the stag, Pearce created it to track down whatever Ronan's dad had left me." 

Ronan had grabbed a handle-like protrusion on their side of the door. He looked at Adam, his eyes narrowed in a hard expression. "Are you absolutely sure?" 

"I don't know what else we can do," Adam said. He looked at the stag, which was still standing beside him but shifting nervously from side to side. Looking back at Ronan, Adam nodded. "Do it. Now." 

Ronan pulled the door open, and all of them stepped to the side. 

The black dog stepped through the open doorway, its massive head lowered, rows of white teeth bared. It stalked slowly forward, muscles tense and ready to spring, a low growl rising in its throat. The stag saw it and watched it warily, the two magical creatures completely ignoring all humans in the vicinity.  

Adam held his breath. The dog was circling to the side, just as he had hoped, moving away from the open door. When there was a good yard between the dog and the door, Adam shouted, "Run!" and gave the stag a hard slap on the rump. 

The stag ran, but it ran the wrong way.  

"No!" Adam shouted, watching with wide eyes as both stag and dog sprinted away from them, away from the door, towards the enclosed other end of the paddock. Adam shouted again, gesturing at the open door but the stag, while magical, did not appear to possess much intelligence. Still letting out panicked snorts it ran towards the back of the enclosure, then turned, running back towards them with the dog still on its heels, though now at least it seemed to have finally recognized the open door as a means of escape. 

It was not fast enough. 

At the last moment the dog summoned some final burst of supernatural strength and sprang onto the stag's back, closing its jaws around the creature's throat. Blood as jewel bright as the flowers sprayed in great gouts across the emerald grass as the stag's knees buckled and it fell to the ground while the dog held on, shaking its head to try and break the larger creature's neck. 

Someone let out an angry scream, and through his own shock Adam realized that it was Ronan. 

When the stag stopped moving the dog jumped back, backing away from them, one of its legs moving a little more gingerly than the others. 

"No!" Adam whispered. "Oh, no no no..." He started walking briskly to where the stag lay in the grass. 

In the short time it took Adam to reach the stag the creature had already begun to decay; blood dried up, its body caved in, like a stop motion film from a nature documentary the body decomposed rapidly before their very eyes, eventually leaving only the glistening white skeleton.  

Adam dropped to his knees beside it, shaking his head in disbelief. "No," he said again. 

A few yards away, the dog had recovered, growling once again as it turned its attention to the humans finally.  

"Uh, guys," Henry said, voice shaking. "I think we might want to...do something..." 

Ronan had walked over to crouch next to Adam. He grabbed one of the stag's bones and hurled it spinning end over end at the dog, but the dog just jumped out of the way, snarling before it began padding towards them, blood still dripping from its jaws.  

"Guys!" Blue said more urgently.  

Adam was still looking down. This wasn't over. This couldn't be it. He had to be missing something.  

"I know what you need to do," Ronan whispered. He looked up and held Adam's gaze as he reached down to lift the top half of the stag's skull from the ground and hold it out to his boyfriend. 

"What?" Adam said, staring at it. He could hear the dog getting closer.  

"Trust me." Ronan said.  

Adam took the skull. He turned it over in his hands; it was lighter than he had expected, considering the size of the antlers. When he had turned it over he saw that the back of the skull was hollowed and open. Adam bit his lip and put the skull on over his face like a mask. He was not all that surprised when it stayed, even after he lowered his hands. 

"Adam look out!" Blue shouted.  

He looked up and saw the dog was only a foot or so away. Letting out a startled cry Adam fell backwards and threw his hands out in a vain attempt to ward off the dog. 

Energy surged through him. The grass between him and the dog whipped into the air, turning into sinuous green vines that lashed at the creature, grabbing it and throwing it a good twenty yards away from them. The dog landed on its side then sprang to its feet, running at Adam again. 

This time, Adam had time to get to his feet. 

"Kick his ass, baby," Ronan muttered. 

Adam tried the same motion, pushing his hand forward and watching as the vines shot up out of the ground again. This time he closed his hand and raised his fist in the air, watching as the vines held the dog fast, lifting it a few inches from the ground. The creature snarled and barked, trying to snap at the vines holding it but they were too tight. 

The strangest thing about it was that Adam could _feel_ every bit of energy involved, he could feel it pulsing from the ground up through the vines, and he could even feel it in the dog, though that felt like a slick oil spill in an otherwise pristine lake. He knew, somehow, that Pearce had created the dog from the energy of the ley line, albeit by tainting it somehow. 

Which meant that it could return to the ley line. 

Closing his eyes so he could focus better, Adam let his hands go slack, though he still held them up in front of his face. Fingers twitching, he felt by means of the vines the entirety of the dog's energy. It felt the way his lips did after eating spicy food, tingly, hot, bordering on painful.  

Little by little, Adam let the energy of the dog trickle back through the vines and down into the earth, like the grounding wire on a lightning rod. It felt very slow to him, but some outside sense told him that the whole thing only took five minutes or so. When Adam opened his eyes he saw the vines were still there, but they were now waving in open air. 

"What...the...shit..." Ronan said. 

"It's gone," Adam replied. He reached up and took the skull off of his face. The vines fell back down and became grass once again. Holding the mask in one hand, Adam let his arm fall to his side, then slowly turned to look at the others. They were all staring at him, jaws slack.  

Then Gansey began to laugh, quietly, disbelievingly. "You magnificent creature," he said to Adam, repeating a phrase he had once said to Ronan what felt like a lifetime ago. "Welcome back, magician." 

*** 

Epilogue 

In the dusky twilight the sleeping cows that dotted the fields of the Barns looked more like massive boulders than living creatures. Ronan had said that he had spent several days trying to figure out how to move them, but the only solution was a forklift and that had proven inefficient at best. So he had left them where they were, figuring they would be fine just as they had been for the years he wasn't there. 

Adam and Ronan walked past the shapes of the cows, heading towards the barn closest to the house. It was still light enough to see by, but Ronan carried a lantern with them, just in case. Adam carried the stag mask.  

Once inside the barn, Ronan switched the lantern on so they could see better as he led the way to the very back, past rows of farm machinery that had long ago rusted from disuse.  

"Here," Ronan said finally. He set the lantern on top of a barrel, then stood on his tiptoes to scoop something off one of the crossbeams on the wall. When he turned, Adam saw that Ronan had a blue jay cupped in his hands. Like the cows, the bird was asleep, and had been asleep since the day Niall Lynch had died. 

"Right," Adam said. "Start small."  

He put the mask on. Somehow, though he was sure the eye holes couldn't possibly line up with his eyes that neatly, Adam could still see Ronan standing in front of him.  

"That's creepy as fuck, I hope you realize that," Ronan said. 

Adam shrugged. "Creepy. Badass. There's some overlap." 

"Fair." Ronan held his hands out, offering the bird to Adam. 

"Okay..." Adam cupped his hands and took the bird. It was warm against his palms, its feathers impossibly soft. It also felt impossibly small, though blue jays were not a particularly tiny species. Adam held it up to his face. He could feel the energy rushing through it. _Come on,_ he thought. _Wake up. You've been asleep for too long_. 

Nothing happened. Ronan let out a disappointed sigh. 

Adam bit his lip and squeezed his eyes shut. _Come on._  

Then all at once the bird began to struggle in Adam's hands, it's heart now racing in its breast, wings trying to tug free of Adam's fingers. 

"Oh!" Adam gasped, and opened his hands. The disgruntled blue jay flew up into the rafters of the barn, letting out several angry sounds as it did.  

Ronan was smiling. He walked over and took the mask off Adam's face, letting it fall to the hay strewn floor. Then he cupped Adam's face in his hands and kissed him, long and slow and deep. "You're fucking amazing, you know that?" he murmured as he drew back. "I love you." 

"I love you too," Adam said quietly, smiling. 

Tomorrow, he thought, he would start helping Ronan wake Niall Lynch's dream creatures. They would bring life back to the sleeping Barns, and probably spend the whole rest of the summer at it as well. 

But that was for tomorrow.  

Adam picked up the mask and wrapped his free arm around Ronan, holding close to him as they started back out of the barn and up to the house, sharing the soft, companionable, awe-filled silence as the world settled down for night and stars winked into existence in the inky blue sky above. 

 


End file.
